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Straight 4 Jesus! (Back Door Christians) At LBC, we will cure your perversion of choice (even if we have to stone you).

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Mary Etheldreda's Avatar
Mary Etheldreda Mary Etheldreda is offline
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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 04:17 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
Reverend Waynetta Kerr,


Thank God, finally someone in this forum that I can agree with.


This entire forum is so repressive I don't know what to do.



Basically I feel like they have locked me in the public pillory in the public square for open ridicule and are using humiliation as a method to punish me.


Rev Kerry may I say that you are indeed a breath of fresh air.


Thank You
Figures. You gays like to stick together.



... <---- You gays in Hell
. <---- Satan
<--- Happy Jesus


Glory!


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 04:24 PM

Incredible, unbelievable, this is totally absurd.



You can't possibly be serious.


You have all be convinced me that I am homosexual, seems like the objective of this forum where I am concerned.



Now you are saying that I will not only burn in hell for being gay, but that you are happy about it and somehow celebrating the fact that I am condemned to eternal hell fire punishment.


Are you serious? Would my eternal punishment in hell really make you happy and be something to celebrate?







Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
Figures. You gays like to stick together.



... <---- You gays in Hell
. <---- Satan
<--- Happy Jesus


Glory!
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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 04:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
Would my eternal punishment in hell really make you happy and be something to celebrate?
A lifelong Baptist would know that Jesus is glorified in Justice, and we celebrate that Glory. Besides, a lifelong Baptist would have read the Bible and known God Almighty Himself tells us He will laugh at those who rebel against Him (Psalm 2:4).


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 05:17 PM

Mary,


But my question was does that make YOU happy?


My perception now is that YOU want me to be homosexual so that I will go to hell, or at least YOU can condemn me to hell and apparently find some kind of sadistic pleasure in my suffering.


Now you are saying that I will not only burn in hell for being gay, but that you are happy about it and somehow celebrating the fact that I am condemned to eternal punishment.


Are you serious?


Do you have any idea what hell would be like?


But again, does that make YOU happy?













Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
A lifelong Baptist would know that Jesus is glorified in Justice, and we celebrate that Glory. Besides, a lifelong Baptist would have read the Bible and known God Almighty Himself tells us He will laugh at those who rebel against Him (Psalm 2:4).
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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 05:23 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
My perception now is that YOU want me to be homosexual so that I will go to hell, or at least YOU can condemn me to hell and apparently find some kind of sadistic pleasure in my suffering.
Yes, that is not surprising. Had you actually read the replies people have offered you, had you actually taken any time to read the Holy Bible, had you ever realistically gone to church, you'd have a more appropriate perception.

Perhaps you should read a simpler book for now:




Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 07:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
Basically I feel like they have locked me in the public pillory in the public square for open ridicule and are using humiliation as a method to punish me.
I would just want to politely remind you, sweetie, that you came here out of your free will and you have posted excruciating details of your sinful life, again out of your free will.

I am not sure what else you expected from us? This is a Christian forum, we stick to the Bible. If you are offended by what the Bible says, please take your grievances directly to the Author. We're just messengers here.
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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 07:24 PM

Yes I wish I had kept my secret sins secret.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Basilissa View Post
I would just want to politely remind you, sweetie, that you came here out of your free will and you have posted excruciating details of your sinful life, again out of your free will.

I am not sure what else you expected from us? This is a Christian forum, we stick to the Bible. If you are offended by what the Bible says, please take your grievances directly to the Author. We're just messengers here.
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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 07:27 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
Yes I wish I had kept my secret sins secret.
Never gonna get Saved™ that way.


James 5:16 "Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much."



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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 07:30 PM

So I have to stand up in front of the church and tell all my secret sins now?


I guess now this forum wants to know all about it.







Quote:
Originally Posted by Didymus Much View Post
Never gonna get Saved™ that way.


James 5:16 "Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much."
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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 07:43 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
So I have to stand up in front of the church and tell all my secret sins now?


I guess now this forum wants to know all about it.
Talking about your fapping adventures is your fetish, dear. Not ours.



Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 07:49 PM

"fapping adventures"


What do you mean? This is not an adventure. I am doing my best to avoid the hell you want to send me to.


"fetish"


Now I am clueless.



Every young man faces the same issues I have been discussing here, only I have been driven insane by all this guilt, condemnation and hell talk.



I honestly came here for counsel, therapy, seeking answers, something to help me deal with my sexual issues.



Considering what I could have told you I don't think I have been graphic at all.



Considering the quick condemnation to hell that I have received I just wish I had never disclosed my secret life.


Spiritual sadists, that's what You are. A bunch of Religious Sadists who would enjoy seeing someone like me burn in hell.



And what did you crazy people do to my profile picture?





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Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
Talking about your fapping adventures is your fetish, dear. Not ours.

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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 08:01 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
Considering what I could have told you I don't think I have been graphic at all.
I don't think you've had time to be graphic, what with wiping off your keyboard just long enough to post a comment that shows the blood has all but left your brain to take care of other... shall we say, organs.

Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
And what did you crazy people do to my profile picture?
I don't see any picture. Maybe all that Gay Raping of Jesus has starved your brain of much needed oxygen and you're hallucinating.


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 08:05 PM

I deleted the picture, someone put up a photo on my profile of a transvestite guy in lipstick, sickening...sorry I took it down but I did not put it up there.



Who did?


You are crazy if you think that I am jacking off to this stupid forum, you have to be kidding me.



And you are wrong again if you think all I do is masturbate....it is actually very rare and it is something I endeavor to keep under control.





Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
I don't think you've had time to be graphic, what with wiping off your keyboard just long enough to post a comment that shows the blood has all but left your brain to take care of other... shall we say, organs.



I don't see any picture. Maybe all that Gay Raping of Jesus has starved your brain of much needed oxygen and you're hallucinating.
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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 08:09 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
And you are wrong again if you think all I do is masturbate....it is actually very rare and it is something I endeavor to keep under control.
If you say so dear. Sure.



Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
Pastor, I admit that I have a problem and need help. I have a serious problem with compulsive masturbation and fear I could become a fag.
.
.
.
I am tempted to also do this terrible act in public as well. I am at a lose as what to do. I fear that I might be masturbating in public like the sinner in the news article you quoted.


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 08:16 PM

Would it shock you to know that I am single and I am a virgin.


Yes, it's true.....I have never had sex with a woman.


I fear I have trusted this forum too much and should have never told you of my secret sins.





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If you say so dear. Sure.

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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-14-2018, 10:50 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
I deleted the picture, someone put up a photo on my profile of a transvestite guy in lipstick, sickening...sorry I took it down but I did not put it up there.



Who did?


You are crazy if you think that I am jacking off to this stupid forum, you have to be kidding me.



And you are wrong again if you think all I do is masturbate....it is actually very rare and it is something I endeavor to keep under control.
It looks quite okay to me...are you seeing something we're not? And I'm very confused...you came on the forum, told everyone you masturbated, and then accused the loving Christians who tried to help you of...well, I'm not sure what you are accusing them of because I can't make head nor tails of your posts.


Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered?
1 Corinthians 11:13
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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-16-2018, 04:24 PM

Someone was replacing my profile picture with a strange looking guy in lipstick with his or hers fingernails painted or something. I deleted it, but someone keeps changing stuff on my profile.



Someone removed my details and replaced it with "is a chronic masturbator with a public masturbation business" or something equally as horrible.



Then I have awardes for being a "Pervert" and a "Homer" it says that I am a Sodomite, none of this is true!!!!!
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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-16-2018, 04:31 PM

How soon the blood-thirsty brain forgets. My dear, you confessed to all these things the other day.



Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-16-2018, 04:37 PM

I never said I was a homosexual and I am not.



I never said I was a Sodomite and I am not.



I never said I was a public masturbator and I am not.



I never said that I grabbed another man's pud or whatever...that is not true.



Why am I branded so cruelly and humiliated with these infractions, fake awards and whatever the hell these "Reputation" points or thingies are.


All wrong, all lies, not true.


What positive counsel I have got from the forum I am doing right now, but this other nonesense has to stop!!!!!


Why do you hate me?


Why do you condemn me to hell and try and humiliate me here and now?






Quote:
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How soon the blood-thirsty brain forgets. My dear, you confessed to all these things the other day.

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Default Re: If you masturbate it means you're gay... - 08-16-2018, 05:21 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bchas77 View Post
Why do you hate me?
I don't think anyone here hates you, dear. From the tone of people's replies, I'd guess that (like me) they are mostly just rather bored by your endless, repetitive whining.

For someone who claims to be an adult male with two imaginary jobs and a practically full-time masturbation habit, you seem to have a lot of time to waste. When do you go back to school?


Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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