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Default Should we forgive Boris Johnson? - 11-24-2021, 08:27 PM

I watched Boris's fascinating business speech last week to leaders of the business's business bureau of business. He was in full flow when - I believe - Jesus struck him with the certain knowledge that the one true religion is the Baptist Church and not Anglicanism.

Quote:
Johnson lost his place during the speech and spent 20 seconds repeating “forgive me” as he shuffled the printed pages on his podium.
If you watch closely, you can almost feel the presence of the antichrist in the room. Should we forgive him?



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Default Re: Should we forgive Boris Johnson? - 11-24-2021, 09:35 PM

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Originally Posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole View Post
I watched Boris's fascinating business speech last week to leaders of the business's business bureau of business. He was in full flow when - I believe - Jesus struck him with the certain knowledge that the one true religion is the Baptist Church and not Anglicanism.
I think BoJo may indeed be ripe to discover The Truth™, something hitherto unknown to him. At the time of his recent (third) marriage, we learned that although he was originally a catlick, he abandoned this false religion, along with his original name, Al, at the age of 13 and took on Anglicanism (the false religion of convenience in Godless England).

This enabled him to marry (and divorce) and remarry (and divorce again). So far, so good. However, wife #3 turned out to be a cataholic and insisted on being married in that vile so-called church. Problem: they don't marry divorced people. Solution? Well, the Boris suddenly remembered that he was a catolick too and everyone agreed that his first two marriages therefore didn't count as they weren't in the "right" church.

Problems will of course arise when the next Mrs J (#4) appears on the scene and at that time he will be looking for some more sympathetic church. The question is, of course, do we want him? He has excellent hair, but I can report from personal experience that his table manners leave a lot to be desired, which made me think of 1 Corinthians 10:31 - Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God.


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Default Re: Should we forgive Boris Johnson? - 11-25-2021, 03:08 AM

Very few politicians live a good, Christian life like President Trump does, so it is not unexpected that Prime Minister Johnson occasionally stumbles. Nevertheless, as Christians, we believe above all in redemption. So I say we accept the Prime Minister, but only on the condition that he caps his number of lifetime divorces at 7 or so, and that none of his spouses have been (or will be) men. After all, forgiveness or not, we have standards to maintain.


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Default Re: Should we forgive Boris Johnson? - 11-26-2021, 07:34 AM

Quote:
he abandoned this false religion, along with his original name, Al, at the age of 13 and took on Anglicanism (the false religion of convenience in Godless England)
Poor Mr Johnson has been smitten with God's current plague and, like Paul when smitten with blindness, may be expected to stumble for a few days after such a life-changing event. In Boris's case these may be prophetic days (or weeks) but I'm encouraged that he unloaded the "Al" moniker, quite likely to mistaken for a very different "al-" component of another set of names nobody can really pronounce. Let's hope he doesn't ditch the "Boris" and go on to the third option available to him!

invokes Picasso @ 0:39 54s clip




Travel from where he was speaking to the theme park is probably least stressful by boat, via the River Tyne, North Sea and The Solent. The blue arrow route would be approx. the same distance as half the circumference of the yellow circle so it's an easy distance to work out and the result is 510 miles. Helicopter would be a better option but I doubt if many helicopter owners would make this particular journey, even for a Picassoesque hair dryer. I believe one hand was raised.

Paul rejected the misinterpretation of God's message running amok all around him. When God smote him he was just as deluded as the rest of them but after a stumbling interlude undertook a mission ultimately sending a message to Rome which turned that wretched city away from the pagan cults leading to a Christian Europe and eventually a Christian America. Without the smiting, where would we be today? Dancing around totem poles constructed in ignorance or (worse) imported Maypoles constructed for the very purpose of mocking God and summoning fertility demons? And we all know what happens next! Boris has rejected the misinterpretation of harmonious trade and the free movement of people running amok all around him. When God smote him he was just as deluded as the rest of them but after a stumbling interlude undertook a mission to free his nation from the Treaty of Rome and the gilded reins of Belgium.

To me the more significant question is: does he really use Picasso's hair dryer?
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Default Re: Should we forgive Boris Johnson? - 11-26-2021, 08:20 PM

Are there any translations available for these videos? I can't understand this guy.
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Default Re: Should we forgive Boris Johnson? - 11-27-2021, 02:34 AM

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Originally Posted by Unfalsifiable View Post
Are there any translations available for these videos? I can't understand this guy.
Boris is fluent not only in his native Latin, but also English. Alas his American is almost gone despite being a citizen until it became inconvenient.


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Default Re: Should we forgive Boris Johnson? - 12-03-2021, 02:19 AM

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Originally Posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole View Post
Boris is fluent not only in his native Latin, but also English. Alas his American is almost gone despite being a citizen until it became inconvenient.
Sister Joanna might know this one - which part of Merrie Olde England do the de Pfeffels hail from? Probably one of those places with a crazy name like Wusstashur.


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Default Re: Should we forgive Boris Johnson? - 12-03-2021, 07:37 AM

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Originally Posted by Dennis Lukes View Post
Sister Joanna might know this one - which part of Merrie Olde England do the de Pfeffels hail from? Probably one of those places with a crazy name like Wusstashur.
I think it's pronounced Woos-cester-chester-Shester-Shur Shire.


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Default Re: Should we forgive Boris Johnson? - 12-03-2021, 08:17 AM

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Originally Posted by Dennis Lukes View Post
Sister Joanna might know this one - which part of Merrie Olde England do the de Pfeffels hail from? Probably one of those places with a crazy name like Wusstashur.
I think the de Pfeffel name comes from one of his paternal (insert appropriate number of greats-) grandmothers who was probably French, though the name's German so should be von und zu und vielleicht bei Piffle. He's also descended from Turks, which explains his ample girth.

(Oh, and nobody knows how to pronounce Worcestershire, so people generally call it Lea & Perrins.)


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Default Re: Should we forgive Boris Johnson? - 12-03-2021, 09:01 AM

When I see Mr Johnson I sometimes wonder whether the "Official Raving Monster Loony Party" has finally succeeded in getting an elected member. And then to become Prime Minister.

It's a shame that Screaming Lord Sutch did not get to see the success of his protégé.


Phil


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Default Re: Should we forgive Boris Johnson? - 12-03-2021, 01:15 PM

To what extent are the pronouncements of catholicism thought to be valid? Baptism by a pope or one of his proxies is about on par with baptism by the tooth fairy. A bit lower down, ok, but in the same ballpark. Well, on the same continent. Probably.

For example if an Anglican vicar escape-pods out of the Church of England he can become a Romish priest and, get this, if he was a married vicar (most of them are) then he remains married. Thus there are married priests. I neither know nor care what the connubial arrangements are but surely if an Anglican who is NOT a vicar escape-pods out, likewise his Church of England foibles would remain intact? If you can have a married priest I don't see why you can't have a protestant catholic.
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