[Jim C. Lombardo]

Jesus-ween is almost upon us, and I'm in the middle of converting our RV Park into a bonafide Hell-house this year. Now I don't wish to brag, but friends have told me I bear some resemblance to Our Lord and Savior which of course, I'm just tickled to accept. As tradition now, I will come out, dressed as our Lord at the end of the Hell-house walk. Visitors get a choice of which exit they may wish to leave from. I will be waiting at one exit to hand out chick-tracts and give a 24-minute Scripture reading. Our park manager, Mr. Timmons, will be waiting at the back door exit dressed as Satan to splash pigs blood on the sinners trying to leave.

At precisely 20:30:25, we will be hosting a Jesus look-a-like contest. The Winner will receive 30 KJV1611 Holy Bibles for their friends and family, a tray of fresh snickerdoodles and a family coupon for all-you-can eat pork at Smith Sanderson's Famous Spit Roast.


Here is me in 1984 when I was younger, and looked a bit more Jesus-y than I might now.

[BrotherLarry]

Brother Jim,

Have you considered asking Jesus - He DOES read and participate in this forum - mostly around Christmas - to be a judge? I mean, He IS a judge, or will be when Judgment Day rolls around, but He loves to be asked to do things, especially when you put the request in the form of a prayer. Don't forget to hallow His Name and ask Him to let His will be done (even though it will be anyway) because He will be more likely to hear and answer you.

The thing is, you look like man's interpretation of our Savior - not necessarily like the real, honest, genuine item. Our Lord is indeed handsome, manly, virile, and oh, so Godly. He is beyond perfect in every way. He loves me, because the Bible tells me so. He is the Rose of Sharon and the bright and morning star. He is such a wonderful and beautiful Savior that I can't describe Him adequately with words.

But I digress. I would send Him a message, if I were you. On the night that is normally dedicated to the devil, I can't imagine that He would refuse being the center of attention at your event. Be sure Fox News is going to be there. You might ask Pastor Zeke, also, but he tends to throw a party of his own that night with his Asian boytoys - I mean, pool boys and praise facilitators.

BrotherLarry

[GaleWhoring the Boring (On Moderation)]

This sounds like a fun contest Jim. Here's me as Jesus in 2002 at Mr. Hoaring's company party. (I blurred him out a little, because I don't really want to discuss him.)

[Elmer G. White]

It is totally irrelevant who looks a bit like Jesus. The thing that matters is who Jesus loves.



John 15:9
As the Father hath loved me, so have I loved you: continue ye in my love.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[GaleWhoring the Boring (On Moderation)]

Maybe it should be a Donald Trump and Jesus look-a-like contest.

[Elmer G. White]

Originally Posted by GaleWhoring

Maybe it should be a Donald Trump and Jesus look-a-like contest.

The only contest that is going on is the strive for a permanent, secure position in Heaven and you're losing big time. It's not about looking like Jesus. It is about looking for Jesus in your heart and soul. That is where President Trump remains our beacon with the luminosity and spectral class of a K-type main sequence star on the Firmament (Genesis 1:6).

Mark 10:47
And when he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to cry out, and say, Jesus, thou Son of David, have mercy on me.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[GaleWhoring the Boring (On Moderation)]

Well good luck with that, because he only gets eight years tops (That is if our country is dense enough to vote him in a second term). Who will be your beacon then? Kid Rock? Kayne West?

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Originally Posted by GaleWhoring

This sounds like a fun contest Jim. Here's me as Jesus in 2002 at Mr. Hoaring's company party. (I blurred him out a little, because I don't really want to discuss him.)

Looks like you were in a little better shape back then Ms. Whoring. Perhaps mocking Jesus has resulted in your being set back presently in the thigh department.

[GaleWhoring the Boring (On Moderation)]

Originally Posted by WilliamJenningsBryan

Looks like you were in a little better shape back then Ms. Whoring. Perhaps mocking Jesus has resulted in your being set back presently in the thigh department.

That's very mean, Bill. Age hits us all eventually.

[Jim C. Lombardo]

Originally Posted by BrotherLarry

Brother Jim,

Have you considered asking Jesus - He DOES read and participate in this forum - mostly around Christmas - to be a judge? I mean, He IS a judge, or will be when Judgment Day rolls around, but He loves to be asked to do things, especially when you put the request in the form of a prayer. Don't forget to hallow His Name and ask Him to let His will be done (even though it will be anyway) because He will be more likely to hear and answer you.

The thing is, you look like man's interpretation of our Savior - not necessarily like the real, honest, genuine item. Our Lord is indeed handsome, manly, virile, and oh, so Godly. He is beyond perfect in every way. He loves me, because the Bible tells me so. He is the Rose of Sharon and the bright and morning star. He is such a wonderful and beautiful Savior that I can't describe Him adequately with words.

But I digress. I would send Him a message, if I were you. On the night that is normally dedicated to the devil, I can't imagine that He would refuse being the center of attention at your event. Be sure Fox News is going to be there. You might ask Pastor Zeke, also, but he tends to throw a party of his own that night with his Asian boytoys - I mean, pool boys and praise facilitators.

BrotherLarry

Praise Brother, for the excellent suggestion. I talk to Jesus regularly and will ask Him next time I'm deep in prayer if he would grace us with being the Judge of all judges for this costume contest.

No question here, I don't dispute that my efforts to capture His Likeness does not compare to the majesty of our Savior's beauty. Nor would I wish for Him to be slighted by some of the more questionable submissions which is why we have security and dog-sniffers at the entrance to check every costume prior, and stifle any suspicious, juvenile intent to disrupt the evening.

[Megan1993]

Originally Posted by Jim C. Lombardo

Jesus-ween is almost upon us, and I'm in the middle of converting our RV Park into a bonafide Hell-house this year. Now I don't wish to brag, but friends have told me I bear some resemblance to Our Lord and Savior which of course, I'm just tickled to accept. As tradition now, I will come out, dressed as our Lord at the end of the Hell-house walk. Visitors get a choice of which exit they may wish to leave from. I will be waiting at one exit to hand out chick-tracts and give a 24-minute Scripture reading. Our park manager, Mr. Timmons, will be waiting at the back door exit dressed as Satan to splash pigs blood on the sinners trying to leave.

At precisely 20:30:25, we will be hosting a Jesus look-a-like contest. The Winner will receive 30 KJV1611 Holy Bibles for their friends and family, a tray of fresh snickerdoodles and a family coupon for all-you-can eat pork at Smith Sanderson's Famous Spit Roast.


Here is me in 1984 when I was younger, and looked a bit more Jesus-y than I might now.

I could not resist.....

[Jim C. Lombardo]

Originally Posted by Megan1993

I could not resist.....

What kind of demonic slang banner is that? It should just say Jesus, or Lord Jesus Christ or Jesus4Trump or if you must use hip abbreviations, WWJD?