WEDDING BELLS! - Christian Wedding Forum A seasonal forum hosted by cyber Bridesmaids, Daisy Mae Johnson, Sister Mary Etheldreda and Sister Talitha . Groomly advice is also offered from Best Man, Pastor Zeke! |
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-01-2008, 01:01 PM
Oh my GOD Mother Glynndie, it's June. IT'S JUNE!!!!!
Will I be Married in a Minute?!
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Unruly True Christian™ Maverick
Forum Member
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Posts: 342
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-02-2008, 01:12 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alex_B
Heat doesn't really bother me much.
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According to the good pastors there won't be any lube in Hell, fudge packer!!! You faggots think Hell is going to be another day of playing hide the sausage with your boyfriend, but you'll find no perverse enjoyment in Hell. The friction caused by Satan's gynormous tallywhacker alone is estimated to produce temperatures of 11 billion degrees fahrenheit.
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Spiritual Mother of LBC
True Christian™
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Posts: 6,341
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, IA
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-02-2008, 01:47 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SUV
That's a nice recipe, Brother Regal. Mother Glynndie, does this meet with your approval?
Brother, might I ask: Do you ever put any of.... yourself, so to speak....into your Baking?
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I would use half the amount of fat and I never use Crisco in cookies. The recipe resembles a commercial bakery recipe intended to make cookies that can be frozen and kept in the display but will still be soft. Of course, all of this fat might get you to see Jesus sooner.
Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 225
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Washington
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-02-2008, 04:38 AM
Vayhr: Oh, yeah, I'm totally a "fudge-packer". That's why I made a thread in the singles section asking for girls. And I bet you would know what it's like to be screwed by satan, now wouldn't you?
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Unruly True Christian™ Maverick
Forum Member
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Posts: 342
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-02-2008, 12:15 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alex_B
Vayhr: Oh, yeah, I'm totally a "fudge-packer". That's why I made a thread in the singles section asking for girls.
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Right, the 18 year old who lives with his mommy and daddy and manages a restaurant that does not exist... Right. Making fake threads in that section make you look even more gay than you are.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alex_B
And I bet you would know what it's like to be screwed by satan, now wouldn't you?
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Quote:
According to the good pastors there won't be any[...]
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I got my info from them during a sermon held a couple of weeks ago. So you are saying the pastors of this church have firsthand experience with Satan's member? That's a very tasteless accusation.
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-02-2008, 01:39 PM
What, "gay" "people" now in our Wedding thread?
That is just so.... GAY!!!!!! Now I'll never get Married!
With goings-on like this, no wonder our Government is beginning to slip the bounds of Propriety in these matters.
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Senior Usher True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom A very nice young man
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-02-2008, 02:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by DogSpitAsshat
No I don't. I do not believe in him so how would I owe him an apology?
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That just means you owe Him an even more contrite apology, for adding the insult of not believing in Him to the injury of whatever sin you committed against Him in the first place! Why do you hate Him so much if you don't even believe in Him?
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Unruly True Christian™ Maverick
Forum Member
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Posts: 342
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-02-2008, 04:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SUV
What, "gay" "people" now in our Wedding thread?
That is just so.... GAY!!!!!! Now I'll never get Married!
With goings-on like this, no wonder our Government is beginning to slip the bounds of Propriety in these matters.
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These are sad times, Sister Sue.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alex_B
Oh, yeah, I'm totally a "fudge-packer".
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Right out of the horse's mouth. He actually had the unmitigated gall to go into the True Christian Singles forum and demand a pure virgin woman so that he could give her HIV. He truly disgusts me.
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-02-2008, 05:10 PM
Being a "fudge packer" must be horrible indeed.
Recall a Mr Jeffrey Dahmer, a worker for the Ambrosia Candy Co.
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 225
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Washington
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-02-2008, 11:43 PM
Did you not notice the after i said that? How conveniently dismissed from your quote.
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
True Christian™
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-03-2008, 03:29 AM
NO GAY WEDDINGS! OK??? That's all I have to say about that.
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-03-2008, 01:11 PM
Well I myself like a nice "gay" Wedding - just one that doesn't include homer!s.
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 9
Join Date: May 2008
Location: In an apartment
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-03-2008, 03:19 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SUV
That's a nice recipe, Brother Regal. Mother Glynndie, does this meet with your approval?
Brother, might I ask: Do you ever put any of.... yourself, so to speak....into your Baking?
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Oh Sister Su! I am a lady.. erm.. not a man. *blush* I have always loved the name, I do realize now that it does sound kind of manly. Hmm, maybe I should change it to something else? I am terribly sorry for the confusion.
*hugs*
Praise be to God!
Matthew 6:24 No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-03-2008, 03:25 PM
No problem at all, Sister!
Our Mens are going to just love your Baking - I can tell!
And perhaps with you around we can get the Christmas Eggnog going a little earlier this Season! Snap, Snap, SNAP!
(I just gave you a "Three snaps up in a 'Z' formation)
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 9
Join Date: May 2008
Location: In an apartment
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-03-2008, 03:40 PM
Oh Christmas baking is so fun! I love it, we can make fudge to go with the eggnog!
Glory to God
Matthew 6:24 No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 51
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Massachusetts
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-11-2009, 03:26 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde
I'm soooooo excited!
I LOVE anything WEDDING!!! Here is a vid I took last year at my cousin Velma's wedding.
I was baffled that her son was born 8 months early and still weighed 6 1/2 lbs. See!! JESUS really does provide miracles for his Chosen.
GLORY!!!!!
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It is physically impossible for a baby to be born 8 months early and be 6.5 lbs. At 1 month, a fetus is only 0.25 inches long.
But I would have you know, that the head of every woman is Christ; and the head of the man is the woman; and the head of Christ is God. - Corinthians 11:3
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 66
Join Date: Jul 2014
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
07-11-2014, 08:20 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Daisy Mae Johnson
I'm soooooo excited!
I LOVE anything WEDDING!!! Here is a vid I took last year at my cousin Velma's wedding.
I was baffled that her son was born 8 months early and still weighed 6 1/2 lbs. See!! JESUS really does provide miracles for his Chosen.
GLORY!!!!!
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your cousin is a bad woman it looks like she's already 8 months pregnant
I would beat her every day because she misbehaves
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Forum Member
Forum Member
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Posts: 1,330
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: In the kitchen
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
06-27-2015, 07:35 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King
NO GAY WEDDINGS! OK??? That's all I have to say about that.
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Brother, I'm sure you've heard the atrocity of the "Supreme" Court Justice. Our church compounds have doubled security with all these "marriages" . I pray that Jesus comes soon!
"Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 16
Join Date: Jul 2015
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
07-24-2015, 11:16 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson
Brother, I'm sure you've heard the atrocity of the "Supreme" Court Justice. Our church compounds have doubled security with all these "marriages" . I pray that Jesus comes soon!
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I think it's something good, everyone should have the opportunity to marry the person they love, as long as the two of them agree with getting married
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
07-25-2015, 02:31 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by AroundTheLooneyBin
I think it's something good, everyone should have the opportunity to marry the person they love, as long as the two of them agree with getting married
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So you think a man should be allowed to "marry" a camel or a goat?
People like you make Jesus and me want to puke.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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