General Church Fellowship A place for True Christians to join in praise, faith and fellowship. |
#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
|
|
Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-15-2010, 07:50 PM
Pastor Ezekiel
I saw the Plastic Jesus business opportunity that Mayor JJ Hold reported on. I got to thinking about stones.
I have a idea. With the Stoning festival coming in a month. What would you think of say importing rocks from Mt. Sinai? I would think that all True Christians from all over the world would want to have actual stones from the very Mountain where Moses stood and God spoke to him. Could we market them as Holy Stones?
|
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 1,424
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: In the sky
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-15-2010, 08:16 PM
Let's not forget that our lovely LOL's are making stoning buckets.
Put up your ideas on what kind of bucket you want: Camo is populair amongst True Christian™ males, so those are keepers. I wonder if the LOL's will try something new this year.
|
|
Mayor of Freehold
|
|
Posts: 12,176
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: City Hall, Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 02:00 AM
Sometimes I can't believe the people one encounters in life. Like this week.
Here we are in Freehold working hard to make the Freehold Summer Stoning Festival a success, and what do I get? Complaints.
Several so called "Christians" in and around Des Moines have been calling and saying things like, "What you are doing is barbaric! Stoning is not Christian! Jesus loved people, he didn't stone them....", blah blah blah.
To each one of them I say, "Read the Bible. Stoning is there." I mean, if they would spend their time learning what the Bible says about stoning, instead of calling me, they'd get somewhere in life.
Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
|
|
Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 02:12 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold
Sometimes I can't believe the people one encounters in life. Like this week.
Here we are in Freehold working hard to make the Freehold Summer Stoning Festival a success, and what do I get? Complaints.
Several so called "Christians" in and around Des Moines have been calling and saying things like, "What you are doing is barbaric! Stoning is not Christian! Jesus loved people, he didn't stone them....", blah blah blah.
To each one of them I say, "Read the Bible. Stoning is there." I mean, if they would spend their time learning what the Bible says about stoning, instead of calling me, they'd get somewhere in life.
|
Deuteronomy 13:10 KJV1611 "And thou shalt stone him with stones, that he die; because he hath sought to thrust thee away from the LORD thy God..."
Sounds like we ought to throw those false Christians in the mix, for trying to keep you from doing God's will.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
|
|
Unsaved trash, Repulsive pervert Investigation Ongoing
|
|
Posts: 153
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: in a valley ,under some trees
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 02:31 AM
i don't know who you're planning to throw these stones at but if you hurt anyone i'm calling the police
Dog's are mans best friend .
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 184
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: In the first row at Church
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 02:49 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dirk
Let's not forget that our lovely LOL's are making stoning buckets.
Put up your ideas on what kind of bucket you want: Camo is populair amongst True Christian™ males, so those are keepers. I wonder if the LOL's will try something new this year.
|
I would like a bucket with the glorious star-spangled-banner on it. I could manage with a Confederate Flag, too. Those men were fighting for God's cause.
|
#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
|
|
Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 03:06 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Forest Spirit
i don't know who you're planning to throw these stones at but if you hurt anyone i'm calling the police
|
Its not nice to tattle, didn't your Pa ever tell you that! Son read the entire thread.
|
|
Winning Souls in his Winnebago
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 3,893
Join Date: May 2010
Location: travelling the heartland in my Winnebago.
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 11:04 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold
Sometimes I can't believe the people one encounters in life. Like this week.
Here we are in Freehold working hard to make the Freehold Summer Stoning Festival a success, and what do I get? Complaints.
Several so called "Christians" in and around Des Moines have been calling and saying things like, "What you are doing is barbaric! Stoning is not Christian! Jesus loved people, he didn't stone them....", blah blah blah.
To each one of them I say, "Read the Bible. Stoning is there." I mean, if they would spend their time learning what the Bible says about stoning, instead of calling me, they'd get somewhere in life.
|
Would you consider a prize for the banner or placard that best depicts the Bibles position on stoning? The prize should be of significance but not of worldly value, a set of autographed pictures of our standing Pastors perhaps.
1 Chronicles 16:15
Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.
|
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 1,424
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: In the sky
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 11:05 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold
Sometimes I can't believe the people one encounters in life. Like this week.
Here we are in Freehold working hard to make the Freehold Summer Stoning Festival a success, and what do I get? Complaints.
Several so called "Christians" in and around Des Moines have been calling and saying things like, "What you are doing is barbaric! Stoning is not Christian! Jesus loved people, he didn't stone them....", blah blah blah.
To each one of them I say, "Read the Bible. Stoning is there." I mean, if they would spend their time learning what the Bible says about stoning, instead of calling me, they'd get somewhere in life.
|
Mayor, was one of the nagging "Christians" called Mike F. Nielsen? Just out of curiousity.
|
|
Winning Souls in his Winnebago
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 3,893
Join Date: May 2010
Location: travelling the heartland in my Winnebago.
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 11:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dirk
Mayor, was one of the nagging "Christians" called Mike F. Nielsen? Just out of curiousity.
|
Brother Dirk, is this some heathen we should all know about?
1 Chronicles 16:15
Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.
|
|
GALS 4 GOD Guidance Counseler Expert at baking, sewing, and rebuking unsaved scum
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,619
Join Date: May 2010
Location: At all times between Genesis and Revelation
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 11:12 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Forest Spirit
i don't know who you're planning to throw these stones at but if you hurt anyone i'm calling the police
|
Are you going to be there Mr Forest Spirit? If so.. what will you be wearing? Just wondering.
YIC,
Mrs.P.Wintersnow.
There's Jesus here,
Just see what He offers me....
Down here my sins forgiven,
Up there a home in heaven
Praise God, That's the way for me!!
|
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 1,424
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: In the sky
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 11:15 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by aim for heaven
Brother Dirk, is this some heathen we should all know about?
|
Well, he claims that the KJV1611 is outdated
To make it worse, he is a Democrat.
|
|
Mayor of Freehold
|
|
Posts: 12,176
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: City Hall, Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 01:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dirk
Mayor, was one of the nagging "Christians" called Mike F. Nielsen? Just out of curiousity.
|
Now that you mention it, yes.
Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
|
|
Mayor of Freehold
|
|
Posts: 12,176
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: City Hall, Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 01:52 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
Deuteronomy 13:10 KJV1611 "And thou shalt stone him with stones, that he die; because he hath sought to thrust thee away from the LORD thy God..."
|
Brother Billy Bob--I'm greatful to the Lord that you quoted the very scripture that was on my heart as well.
In fact, I quoted this very scripture in letters to both Iowa Governor Chet Culver, the current Governor, a Democrat, and his challenger, former Governor Terry Branstad, a Republican. We are constructing a large speakers platform on the Festival site with lots he red, white and blue decorations. I invited them both to make political remarks. They both wear "Christian" views on their respective sleeves.
This invitation will give them an opportunity to weigh in as genuine believers. If they do not endorse stoning as a Christian concept, well, goodby to both of them. I'll keep you posted on their responses.
Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
|
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 1,424
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: In the sky
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-16-2010, 02:19 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold
Now that you mention it, yes.
|
Well, I heard he has been thinking of converting to islam, that's why I ask.
|
|
True Christian™ Creation Cosmologist Strong in Spirit and Filled With Christ's Wisdom A Greater Genius Than Einstein, Hawking, and Sagan Combined
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 860
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-17-2010, 05:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Dewitt
Shout Glory , I am going to PM brother Alex on this one. Logistics might be a bit of a hassle, Iceland is in the middle of the ocean. I wonder if FMF( Brother Fee Market Fred) can help? If I am not mistaken Uranus corp. has ships. Brother Hutchins has trucking covered. I smell a gold mine, naturally a cut of the profits from sale of said rocks will be given directly to LBC or the Pastors. Do not worry, we will take care of you on the backside.
|
I got your message, Brother. I have already hired a group of Poles to bring me all the obsidian they can find on this depraved little island. We could make a fortune from this. Not only are these stones perfectly fit for stoning, but we could also make souvenirs engraved with some inspirational Bible quotes...
I also got a pile of lava stones in my backyard. They're great for stoning due to their rough surface. I use them myself when me and my children gather together to stone my wife. She barely speaks anymore and keeps all her focus on cooking and cleaning, just like a True Christian™ woman should do.
I'll bring some samples when I get to Freehold, then we could make some arrangements for shipping the rest of the stones overseas. Tell me what you think.
- Alex
|
|
Winning Souls in his Winnebago
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 3,893
Join Date: May 2010
Location: travelling the heartland in my Winnebago.
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-17-2010, 05:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Alex
I got your message, Brother. I have already hired a group of Poles to bring me all the obsidian they can find on this depraved little island. We could make a fortune from this. Not only are these stones perfectly fit for stoning, but we could also make souvenirs engraved with some inspirational Bible quotes...
I also got a pile of lava stones in my backyard. They're great for stoning due to their rough surface. I use them myself when me and my children gather together to stone my wife. She barely speaks anymore and keeps all her focus on cooking and cleaning, just like a True Christian™ woman should do.
I'll bring some samples when I get to Freehold, then we could make some arrangements for shipping the rest of the stones overseas. Tell me what you think.
- Alex
|
Brother What a wonderful Idea, where ever did you come up with that?
on another note have I told you that I will be approaching the mayor soon with plans to open a Christian RV park in the area for those visitors that come to visit Freehold. I am sure that a positive word from a couple of upstanding businessmen would go a long way towards my being approved.
1 Chronicles 16:15
Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.
|
|
True Christian™ Creation Cosmologist Strong in Spirit and Filled With Christ's Wisdom A Greater Genius Than Einstein, Hawking, and Sagan Combined
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 860
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-17-2010, 06:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by aim for heaven
Brother What a wonderful Idea, where ever did you come up with that?
|
I guess I'm just inspired by God's holy word.
|
|
True Christian™ Entrepreneur
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,695
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Leviticus Landing Gated Community, Freehold IA
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-17-2010, 06:47 PM
I like the mention in Joshua 7:25 of burning the victim after he's pummled to death with rocks. I don't think taxpayers should be responsible for disposing of the body. Just burn it and walk away.
|
|
Winning Souls in his Winnebago
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 3,893
Join Date: May 2010
Location: travelling the heartland in my Winnebago.
|
|
Re: Have You started collecting stones? -
06-17-2010, 07:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Alex
I guess I'm just inspired by God's holy word.
|
How absolutely wonderful I guess I really should be talking with Brother James about his Iceland Idea.And the dated business plan I had written and notarized and copy sent to my silent business partner in Freehold,who is to be named later if the absolute need arises.
1 Chronicles 16:15
Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved
|