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Deaconess Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
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Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
04-07-2009, 02:55 PM
I was recently sent a copy of this advertisement by a poor persecuted Christian living in New Zealand.
It claims to show an obvious Jezebel smiling in Church because she allegedly has some kind of perverted sex toy in her anus.
Of course, I had to carry out research to find out what kind of disgusting item these obvious followers of Satan are peddling.
These are (apparently) anal beads:
I FOUND THESE ON A SO-CALLED CHRISTIAN MARITAL AIDS WEBSITE!
The connection with this "item" and the Catholic Rosary is pretty obvious.
Here is a picture from as long ago as 1578 of a Catholic Homo and his Beads:
Just look at the way the creature is sniffing the beads
YES! I said HOMO
Also, look at this Catholic Priest trying to force the beads on to a poor unsuspecting child!
To add insult to injury, these other items also featured on this Christian Pornography site. (Ladies, please close your eyes).
I have written to the owners of this site and raised the strongest possible objections. I have also demanded that they send samples of these items so I can see first hand how disgusting they are.
If you haven't already realized, "I'm on Anal Beads" is an anagram of Osama bin Laden
Jesus weeps.
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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God Squad
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
04-07-2009, 03:06 PM
And I thought it was about Dingleberries!
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 444
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ottawa, KS, soon to move to Freehold, Iowa!
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
04-07-2009, 03:06 PM
Sister Talitha,
Thank God for the wonderful work you are doing in His Name! I have long thought about a possible connection between these two items. I would be most appreciative if you would keep me informed of your ongoing research into these depraved "marital aids." I hope to be able to help others in the future withstand these kind of temptations.
In Christ,
Warren
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
04-07-2009, 03:17 PM
The package indicates multi-purpose. What else could you do with that thing?!?
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Moderator Arms Dealer for CHRIST Hands folded for Jesus
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Posts: 5,251
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: On the Straight and Narrow (Earthly location: Freehold, Iowa)
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
04-07-2009, 03:54 PM
I feel physically ill! Do the depths of depravity know no end?
Sister, I will be praying for you as you carry out your GODly research and crusade against perverted toys and those who sell them!
BEWARE however, because it's possible the toys were manufactured by homosexuals and are already carrying AIDS or the same gay chemicals that are injected into Skittles!
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
04-07-2009, 06:12 PM
Dissssssssgusting! Leave it to the Catlicks to do something sickening and perverted with beads and butts.
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
04-07-2009, 06:46 PM
...and to try to Torture a poor little Easter Bunny with those vile things too
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One of the Lord's Airborne Rangers Salvation from Above God's Favorite Pilot™
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Posts: 6,282
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Flying the Friendly Skies for Jesus!
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
04-08-2009, 12:48 AM
I'm sure the lesbian whores I've been keeping tabs on (Kristen Stewart, Nikki Reed, and Lily Allen) are all well acquainted with those disgusting devices.
Especially Lily Allen, an admitted 'back there' slut!
Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!
God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!
Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
Last edited by Capt. Aaron Portway; 12-06-2012 at 04:20 PM.
Reason: Typo
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Jesus's Favorite Nurse
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Posts: 974
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Location: Landover Basement
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
04-08-2009, 02:31 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King
The package indicates multi-purpose. What else could you do with that thing?!?
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This guy could use it as dental floss.
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 10
Join Date: May 2009
Location: My house
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
05-07-2009, 10:05 PM
So talitha what kind of research do you plan on doing with them? im new to this site and don't know what you mean exactly.
Leviticus 20:27
A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood shall be upon them.
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Forum Member, lost in space
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Posts: 794
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Within this family. Praising God for finding them
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
07-06-2009, 08:45 PM
Those things are perverted. I couldn't imagine the type of person that would use them. They are just plain nasty.
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Jesus Favorite Christian
Most Precious in the Sight of Jesus
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Posts: 27
Join Date: May 2008
Location: The only country God cares for.
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
07-13-2009, 01:31 AM
Since I am certain this thread has something to do with Dora Denkins, I fastidiously avoided reading any of it.
I will offer this, however: "Satan's Rosary" seems redundant. Since the cheap costume jewelry Roman Catholics fumble their foolish way around while mindlessly repeating magical incantations is clearly a relic of Satan's Gift Shop, all "rosaries" of of the Devil -- regardless of how they are used.
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WARNING! Racist communist feminazi bulldyke Unsaved trash
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Posts: 293
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: University of California, Berkeley
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
07-13-2009, 04:57 AM
I think if a lot of you tight-assed Christians (no pun intended) actually tried these marvelous toys, your attitude would change. The anus is not as dirty as your patriarchal, heterosexual society tells you. The anus is a wonderful fountain of pleasure, meant to be stimulated by your partner. My wife and I owe much of the satisfaction of our sex life with each other due to creative anal play on each other.
I would imagine once you people become ANALLY LIBERATED you wouldn't be so judgemental, racist, bigoted, and downright mean in real life.
Professor Emerita of African-American Studies at UC Berkeley
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Doubting Thomas
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Posts: 203
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Location: Bend, OR
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
07-13-2009, 05:27 AM
wait... aren't regular rosaries already of satan, seeing as how the catlick church uses them?
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Doubting Thomas
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Posts: 203
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Bend, OR
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
07-13-2009, 05:29 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Tyeisha X
The anus is a wonderful fountain of pleasure
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Even as a fellow sexually liberated atheist, I find that a downright disturbing string of words, in or out of context .
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True Christian™
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Posts: 151
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: In peace.
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
07-14-2009, 03:04 AM
Oh deary me! It's time to redecorate. I had NO idea!
Recognition, sorrow, confession, forgiveness, restitution, forsaking the sin. The Lord forgives me of my sin.
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True Christian™ Televangelist Director of Fundraising and Tithing On the Look Out for Wife #6!
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Posts: 8,727
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
07-14-2009, 04:51 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by JRFinn
wait... aren't regular rosaries already of satan, seeing as how the catlick church uses them?
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Yea and if you would've scrolled just a little bit up you would see that America's Best Christian, Mrs. Betty Bowers made that exact same point. Try getting some original thoughts for a change.
Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.
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Doubting Thomas
Forum Member
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Posts: 203
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Bend, OR
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
07-14-2009, 04:54 AM
Yes, thank you for pointing that out, but I tend to avoid anything Bowers has to say. America's Best Christian? I'm not a man of the Word, but if there ever was a generation of vipers, it's LBC.
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
True Christian™
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
07-14-2009, 05:02 AM
Here is someone who made necklaces out of her own anal bead toy:
Quote:
anal bead necklace
Anal bead necklace by sylvain willenz.
series of rubber necklaces made from solid straight moulds dipped into liquid rubber. when cured, the rubber necklace is removed from the tool, creating a hollow and flexible tube. various shapes are obtained, from regular bead arrangements to random molecular conglomerates.
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Disgusting.
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Professor of Creation Science at Landover University Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,991
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Returned from studying the negro in Africa.
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Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! -
07-14-2009, 05:06 AM
That certainly puts an even more offensive twist on the already ungodly practice of "necking"!
Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University
Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!
Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
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