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Default Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-05-2007, 11:04 AM

Let this be a lesson to all; Just because some guy calls himself a "Baptist" and stands up in the pulpit every Sunday and shouts verses from the Bible at you, it doesn't necessarily follow that he is a True Christian™. Only pastors from God's favorite church, Landover Baptist Church that is, can be trusted to look out for your best interests with Jesus. Thank the Good Lord that I am nothing like THIS fool. I can be trusted completely with your Tithes and robust Love Offerings, with no fear of a high speed police chase through the streets of Freehold.

Quote:
Pastor tells police he led double life

He was a regular at Shari’s, where he usually sat at the counter and workers and diners knew his first name.

But Monday morning, Herman Lewis skipped the counter and instead tried to pay a cook to have sex in a Corvette and punched an elderly regular in the face so hard that Lewis told detectives he thought he’d killed him, according to court documents released Tuesday.

The documents state that the Morning Star Baptist Church pastor went on a bizarre rampage beginning at Shari’s Restaurant at Northwest Boulevard and Monroe Street and ending 10 blocks away with Lewis being taken away by ambulance, claiming that he was “God and/or Jesus.”

During interviews with police, Lewis, 49, told investigators he had been living a “double life,” and that “he would tell his congregation that he would praise Jesus and get the congregation to kick up their heels and say a few amens,” according to the documents.

After that, “the money would start rolling in,” Lewis told police. The pastor told police he would visit bars, drink, use crack cocaine and PCP, and pick up prostitutes.

Family members gathered outside a screening room in which Lewis’ first appearance was televised Tuesday afternoon. His wife, Sandra D. Lewis, sobbed loudly, according to witnesses.

Sandra Lewis told police that Herman Lewis had been acting strangely for the last four days, and that Sunday night he checked himself in to Sacred Heart Medical Center and spoke with a psychologist before being released.

The next morning, Lewis went to Shari’s, where he offered a cook $50 and asked her to have sex in the 2007 Corvette that Lewis was using as part of a three-day test drive, according to the documents.

When the cook declined, Lewis allegedly grabbed the woman and tried to force her out of the restaurant. She screamed for help, and an elderly customer rushed to her aid, punching Lewis, authorities said. Lewis returned the punch, leaving the man with bruises around his mouth and eye, police said.

Lewis then drove across the street to McDonald’s. He told detectives he went into the restaurant looking for another woman with whom to have sex and was prepared to use the gun taped under the dash of his car to force her.

But “all he saw were old people and kids,” the documents said. As he walked out, a police officer who had parked behind the Corvette ordered him to stop.

Lewis instead said, “Move your car,” according to police.

Lewis tried to get back into the vehicle while officers struggled to remove him, police said, but Lewis gained control and began moving the car forward and backward, pushing the police cruiser out of the way far enough so he could escape. In the process, he sent an officer flying toward a patrol car, giving him minor injuries.

Another officer drew his gun and tried to prevent Lewis from leaving, but Lewis drove straight toward him, police said. The officer had to roll out of the way, and Lewis fled.

Lewis drove east on Indiana, blowing by a set of spike strips and finally becoming stuck in traffic at Indiana and Division, police said. Officers used a Taser to get him out of the car, and as he was being arrested, they said Lewis told them that they had no authority to arrest him because he was a higher power.

Lewis remains in Spokane County Jail, where he declined an interview.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-05-2007, 11:25 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
The documents state that the Morning Star Baptist Church pastor went on a bizarre rampage beginning at Shari’s Restaurant at Northwest Boulevard and Monroe Street and ending 10 blocks away with Lewis being taken away by ambulance, claiming that he was “God and/or Jesus.”
Morning Star Baptist Church? Friends, no-one should be surprised that the Pastor of the Morning Star Baptist Church is acting like that. Let's take a moment to review the meanings associated with the phrase Morning Star:
1. Lucifer. Contrary to what our friend Lady Marmalade thinks, True Christians™ do not bow down before Satan.
2. Vegetarianism and veganism. Morningstar Farms is the name of a demonic enterprise producing Soylent Greenesque unmeat to be consumed by vegetarians and vegans, who, as all True Christians™ know, are nothing more than an atheistic rabble who deserve to be slaughtered like the pigs they worship.
3. Communism. The Morning Star is Britain's most nauseatingly socialist daily newspaper (of course, the entire mainstream media is run by commie Joos, but the ones behind the Morning Star don't even bother hiding it), and exists solely for the purpose of winning over gullible fools and drunkards to Communism.

And these people thought it'd be a good name for a Church? Jesus weeps, He truly does.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-05-2007, 03:51 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance View Post
1. Lucifer. Contrary to what our friend Lady Marmalade thinks, True Christians™ do not bow down before Satan.
That would explain the prominence of the "morning star" in that detestable and demonic practice, astrology. I can hear the pagans now, "Oh look at me mommy, I was born under the sign of the lion, meow."


5 O LORD, how great are thy works! and thy thoughts are very deep. 6 A brutish man knoweth not; neither doth a fool understand this. 7 When the wicked spring as the grass, and when all the workers of iniquity do flourish; it is that they shall be destroyed for ever: 8 But thou, LORD, art most high for evermore.
Psalm 92:5-8
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Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-07-2007, 02:24 PM

The arrests are getting closer and closer together! Someday all of those false Baptists will be in maximum security lockdown where they belong! Then they can't spread all of there tree-hugging, hippy garbage and America will once again return to its Godly values. Praise!
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Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-07-2007, 03:32 PM

WOW!

He sounds like one heck of a fighting man! Strong and Rightious.

should go to the Landover Rehabilitaion Clinic and I'm sure he'll be pulling in cash again in no time.


I am on the adventure of a lifetime! This is even better than the time I used the plastic stones!
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Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-09-2007, 01:47 AM

False Baptist, isn't that an oxymormon?
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Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-09-2007, 12:28 PM

No it isn't. We here at Landover are Southern Baptists. As Mrs. Betty Bowers says, if you're not a Southern Baptist you might as well be doing human sacrifices on your front lawn for all the good it will do you.
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One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
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Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-09-2007, 12:52 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bozo James View Post
False Baptist, isn't that an oxymormon?
There are plenty of false Christians in the world, and some of them label themselves Baptists. They are countless. Only True Christians™ have been washed clean of all sin by the blood of the lamb. Thank you JESUS!!

"For many deceivers are entered into the world, who confess not that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh. This is a deceiver and an antichrist." -- 2 John 7

An oxymormon is a man dressed up like a girl. That is also called a pervert, a hellbound sissy, sodomite fool, and just plain mormon. Jesus hates you, and has promised you will spend an eternity gulping sulfur because of your chosen mormonic behavior. You are not pretty or clever, just pathetic and rejected by God.

Rom.1:26-27
For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature. And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-09-2007, 01:15 PM

Ohh I see, Southern Baptists" you mean like white trailer trash?
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Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-09-2007, 01:23 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bozo James View Post
Ohh I see, Southern Baptists" you mean like white trailer trash?
It would be appreciated if you could keep your racist comments to yourself in Jesus's forum. Pastor Ezekiel has shown a great deal of patience with you so far and all you've done is spit in his face. You're a guest here, please behave accordingly.
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Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-09-2007, 04:05 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bozo James View Post
False Baptist, isn't that an oxymormon?
By False Baptists, we mean people like Martin Luther Coon - not oxy, just mormons.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-09-2007, 05:10 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Samuel View Post
No it isn't. We here at Landover are Southern Baptists. As Mrs. Betty Bowers says, if you're not a Southern Baptist you might as well be doing human sacrifices on your front lawn for all the good it will do you.
No, Samuel, as I have already explained to you, we are NOT Southern Baptists. We are Independent Fundamentalist Baptists.

Last edited by OnYourKnees; 05-09-2007 at 05:17 PM.
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Posts: 2,693
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Leviticus Landing Gated Community, Freehold IA
H. Montague Worthington will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!H. Montague Worthington will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!H. Montague Worthington will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!H. Montague Worthington will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!H. Montague Worthington will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!H. Montague Worthington will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!H. Montague Worthington will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!H. Montague Worthington will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!H. Montague Worthington will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!H. Montague Worthington will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!H. Montague Worthington will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Another False Baptist Arrested - 05-11-2007, 06:46 PM

I think it would be a lot easier to recognize other True Christians™ if we had some type of uniform. I think we should wear khaki shirts with a black tie and a beltbuckle insignia. For some color, we could add a red armband.

This would help us recognize each other as True Christians™, and serve as a display of our awesome power.

Just a suggestion to avoid the type of confusion that occured in this case.
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