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(#41)
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Capt. Aaron Portway's Avatar
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Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-20-2009, 04:56 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
False. I have converted not one, not two, but several dozen Mudslimes to Christianity. Unfortunately for them, they only survived a few seconds after thier conversion (long story, pretty funny really), so none of them are around today.



The person below me is a race traitor. (T/F)
False-ish.

Both of my ex wives, the first of which I remarried after divorcing the second one, were white. However, neither were True Christians™ as I had yet to be Saved. So in a way . . . oh I don't know!


The person beneath me prays while driving.

T/F




Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
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Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-20-2009, 06:21 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capt. A. Portway View Post
False-ish.

Both of my ex wives, the first of which I remarried after divorcing the second one, were white. However, neither were True Christians™ as I had yet to be Saved. So in a way . . . oh I don't know!


The person beneath me prays while driving.

T/F
True, the Landover Security Humves have their steering wheels modified with a joystick like handle inside the wheel to aid this.

The person below me has had a series of vivid dreams about Corinthians.



Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

Hot Must ReadThreads!


Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-20-2009, 09:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
True, the Landover Security Humves have their steering wheels modified with a joystick like handle inside the wheel to aid this.

The person below me has had a series of vivid dreams about Corinthians.
False. I have, however, had a series of seriously vivid dreams about The Revelation of St. John the Divine. I am currently building them into a two-week lecture series to be offered in likeminded churches throughout the country for Adult Vacation Bible School/Revival End-Times Teaching Seminars.

The person below me has had lustful thoughts today.

In Christ,
Warren
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Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 12:58 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Warren Wierdsbe View Post

The person below me has had lustful thoughts today.

In Christ,
Warren
False. I don't know the meaning of lust. Just ask my fiancee.


The person below me has a rapture-ready toilet installed in their home.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 01:15 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
The person below me has a rapture-ready toilet installed in their home.
False!

There are 17 Rapture-Ready Toilets installed at The Monthly Visitor, courtesy of the previous owner.

They're remarkably water-efficient, so the local building codes official had no problem with me keeping them.

The person below me has questions about whether the Rapture will occur before, during, or after the Tribulation.


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Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 01:23 AM

False.

1 Thessalonians makes it clear there will be a Rapture. Matthew 24 makes it clear that it will occur during the Tribulations.

The person below me is a Republican.


In the Beginning God created the Heaven and the Earth. Genesis 1.1. This scripture is the first verse of the Bible for a reason. It lays the foundation for the absolute truth found in God's Holy WORD, the Bible.
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Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 01:57 AM

True. Prior to my 1974 conversion, I was a far-left liberal Dumbocrat. Then I realized the errors of my ways and became a Republican. It's called "growing up".

The person below me has read the Bible from cover to cover.


SPACESHIP JESUS appeared to me in Astronaut form when I was staying in a motel in 1974. He then told me the TRUTH about our world and what illusions the SATANIC ALLIANCE uses to control us! To this day, I still receive SPACESHIP RADIO SIGNALS INTO MY BRAIN. Absolve yourself of your limited Matrix existence.

Hosea 9:7
The days of visitation are come, the days of recompence are come; Israel shall know it: the prophet is a fool, the spiritual man is mad, for the multitude of thine iniquity, and the great hatred.
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Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 02:00 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MP Helmholtz View Post

The person below me has read the Bible from cover to cover.
True. Not only that, I committed it to memory by the tender age of 5. For more details on my bio, please take a look at THIS.


The person below me has talked to a gay.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 02:08 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
The person below me has talked to a gay.
True.

He was my hairdresser. I had no idea he was a gay, until he mentioned that he was going to San Fransissyco for a street fair on Folsom Street.

I inquired about it, thinking it might be fun to go as well, and he showed me photographs.



I reported him to Bobby-Joe, hoping he could be brought into Betty Bowers' BASH program. The next day, he was gone and there was a nice new flowerbed outside his (now closed) shop. I'm not sure where he went, or why he planted flowers before leaving town. I do know that the rosebush in the middle has grown by leaps and bounds in just one year! He must have fertilized it well.

The person below me hopes ACORN will be successful with the Cloward/Piven strategy.


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Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 02:28 AM

False. Those ACORN people are completely NUTS!

From Pastor Zeke's bio...
At 5-years old, little Ezekiel had memorized the entire KJV 1611 Bible. In addition, he memorized the first 2,000 pages of Strong's Concordance and quite by accident, 2-years worth articles from his mother's subscription to Women's Day magazine which were laying on the coffee table next to the concordance.

You truly were a child genius, Pastor Zeke! How come when Mozart is 5 he writes "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" and is worshipped in history books, but your much more intellectually complex feat goes unnoticed by mass media? Oh yea. Joos.

When I was 5, I was running my first scam. It was a "lemonade" stand that I was selling cups of it for a nickel. In reality, it was just some dog urine and Mt. Dew.

Back to the game....
The person below me has had wet dreams about Hillary Clinton.


SPACESHIP JESUS appeared to me in Astronaut form when I was staying in a motel in 1974. He then told me the TRUTH about our world and what illusions the SATANIC ALLIANCE uses to control us! To this day, I still receive SPACESHIP RADIO SIGNALS INTO MY BRAIN. Absolve yourself of your limited Matrix existence.

Hosea 9:7
The days of visitation are come, the days of recompence are come; Israel shall know it: the prophet is a fool, the spiritual man is mad, for the multitude of thine iniquity, and the great hatred.
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Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 02:38 AM

Like her drenched in blood? I may have imagined that.

Next person loves rocky road ice cream.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 02:48 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King View Post
Next person loves rocky road ice cream.
False!

Nobar, every True Christian™ knows that "Rocky Road" is the Sodomite flavor!

The person below me eats Acorns for lunch.


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Mad Prophet Helmholtz's Avatar
Mad Prophet Helmholtz Mad Prophet Helmholtz is offline
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Mad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 03:02 AM

False! You'll never find any NUTS in MY MOUTH!

The person below me harbors a secret admiration for Kim Jong Il.


SPACESHIP JESUS appeared to me in Astronaut form when I was staying in a motel in 1974. He then told me the TRUTH about our world and what illusions the SATANIC ALLIANCE uses to control us! To this day, I still receive SPACESHIP RADIO SIGNALS INTO MY BRAIN. Absolve yourself of your limited Matrix existence.

Hosea 9:7
The days of visitation are come, the days of recompence are come; Israel shall know it: the prophet is a fool, the spiritual man is mad, for the multitude of thine iniquity, and the great hatred.
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Meek and Humble's Avatar
Meek and Humble Meek and Humble is offline
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Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 03:43 AM

False, I can never admire communist Chinese folk.

The person under me has never defiled themselves by being "under" someone they weren't married to.
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(#55)
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Rachael Van Helsing's Avatar
Rachael Van Helsing Rachael Van Helsing is offline
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Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 04:10 AM

ROFL, true....

The person below me has read 'origin of species' by Charles Darwin



Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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(#56)
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Mad Prophet Helmholtz's Avatar
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Mad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 04:14 AM

False. I don't read books. I burn them.

The person under me has ever been institutionalized in a mental health facility.


SPACESHIP JESUS appeared to me in Astronaut form when I was staying in a motel in 1974. He then told me the TRUTH about our world and what illusions the SATANIC ALLIANCE uses to control us! To this day, I still receive SPACESHIP RADIO SIGNALS INTO MY BRAIN. Absolve yourself of your limited Matrix existence.

Hosea 9:7
The days of visitation are come, the days of recompence are come; Israel shall know it: the prophet is a fool, the spiritual man is mad, for the multitude of thine iniquity, and the great hatred.
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(#57)
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Meek and Humble's Avatar
Meek and Humble Meek and Humble is offline
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Posts: 6,232
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Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Meek and Humble will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 04:20 AM

False.

The person under me agrees that gypies are going to hell.
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Nurse Clampett's Avatar
Nurse Clampett Nurse Clampett is offline
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Nurse Clampett has bribed people to get these reputation points.Nurse Clampett has bribed people to get these reputation points.Nurse Clampett has bribed people to get these reputation points.Nurse Clampett has bribed people to get these reputation points.Nurse Clampett has bribed people to get these reputation points.Nurse Clampett has bribed people to get these reputation points.Nurse Clampett has bribed people to get these reputation points.Nurse Clampett has bribed people to get these reputation points.Nurse Clampett has bribed people to get these reputation points.Nurse Clampett has bribed people to get these reputation points.Nurse Clampett has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 04:24 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher View Post
False.

The person under me agrees that gypies are going to hell.
TRUE!
The person under me has taken Haldol.
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(#59)
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JennyD's Avatar
JennyD JennyD is offline
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JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 05:18 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Clampett View Post
TRUE!
The person under me has taken Haldol.
False!

The person under me is also beneath me.


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Huckabee/Palin Gingrich 2012 will reclaim America for Christ! PRAISE!

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Bobby-Joe's Avatar
Bobby-Joe Bobby-Joe is offline
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Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: The person under me: (True or false) - 05-21-2009, 03:46 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher View Post
Verily!

The person under me has stoned a witch
er,.. due to an order of Pastor Decon Fred I all I can say is am a good Christian who follows ALL of The Bible and all laws.


The person under me has played Left Behind, Eternal Fores five times.



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