[curtisedwardgrice (Quarantined)]

My names Curtis Edward Grice and I'm here to join your church I thought about it and I'm ready to be a member

[Elmer G. White]

Originally Posted by curtisedwardgrice

My names Curtis Edward Grice and I'm here to join your church I thought about it and I'm ready to be a member

Hello to you. Mr. Grice,

How nice of you to realize that there is one Real, True™ Church left on Earth (it is us, obviously).

You are still a stranger to us and we'd like to know you better. How did you find Jesus! What parts of the Good Book speak to you most fervently? How's begetting?

You'll find us very welcoming and charitable!

Hebrews 13:2
Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[curtisedwardgrice (Quarantined)]

I love the Bible, the story of Job is my favorite.
I was raised in church.
Begetting? (Meaning?)

[Elmer G. White]

Originally Posted by curtisedwardgrice

I love the Bible, the story of Job is my favorite.
I was raised in church.
Begetting? (Meaning?)

Dear Friend,

The story of Job is indeed magnificent. Do you especially enjoy the parts that depict dinosaurs and thus prove young-day Creationism?

Begetting is the synonym for siring new soldiers for Christ!

Genesis 5:3
And Adam lived an hundred and thirty years, and begat a son in his own likeness, after his image; and called his name Seth:


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[curtisedwardgrice (Quarantined)]

It is interesting, I always thought that man walked with dinosaurs, and confused them with dragons in the 16th century

[curtisedwardgrice (Quarantined)]

Everyone needs to wake up and follow the Lord before the Lord forgets they exist

[James Hutchins]

Originally Posted by curtisedwardgrice

My names Curtis Edward Grice and I'm here to join your church I thought about it and I'm ready to be a member

Welcome Curtis.
While we are thrilled you'd like to be a member of LBC, a bigger question is, does LBC want you as a member. You cannot just walk in the the gates past security at Landover and into the Church. Why we'd have every Tom, Dick and Harry coming in and the members who have proven their devotion to Jesus by making substantial contributions to further the work of Christ deserve the token of appreciation by being provided with reserved parking, scooter chairs, coffee served with scones pew side and fine linens. Could you imagine the outrage if something was soiled or a scone was missing?
Please contact Miss Cookie in the Church office. Request the forms needed to apply for membership. Include a check payable to Cash for the $5,000.00 consideration processing fee. Do not forget the last ten years of 1040's and at least three recommendations from a Gold Tither™ or above. The Church board will look forward to reviewing your application when time permits.

[Brother Harold Porter]

Originally Posted by curtisedwardgrice

My names Curtis Edward Grice and I'm here to join your church I thought about it and I'm ready to be a member

Excellent! Although I do not know how to welcome you by name, as you seem to have three? Not to worry, it has happened.

John 1:42 "And he brought him to Jesus. And when Jesus beheld him, he said, Thou art Simon the son of Jona: thou shalt be called Cephas, which is by interpretation, A stone."

I see that you are a man of few words, which is no penalty in the eyes of God, be assured.

Psalm 39:2 "I was dumb with silence, I held my peace, even from good; and my sorrow was stirred."

To join God's church, you will need to align your worldview with what God tells us. Starting alphabetically, with the curse of autism/gayness, do you agree that the homosexual threat posed by autistics is a very real cause for concern in these troubled times? And that real Christians have every reason to be alarmed by the degenerates?

In Christ

[curtisedwardgrice (Quarantined)]

I lost my username and password you can call me Curtis

[curtisedwardgrice (Quarantined)]

Originally Posted by Brother Harold Porter

Excellent! Although I do not know how to welcome you by name, as you seem to have three? Not to worry, it has happened.

John 1:42 "And he brought him to Jesus. And when Jesus beheld him, he said, Thou art Simon the son of Jona: thou shalt be called Cephas, which is by interpretation, A stone."

I see that you are a man of few words, which is no penalty in the eyes of God, be assured.

Psalm 39:2 "I was dumb with silence, I held my peace, even from good; and my sorrow was stirred."

To join God's church, you will need to align your worldview with what God tells us. Starting alphabetically, with the curse of autism/gayness, do you agree that the homosexual threat posed by autistics is a very real cause for concern in these troubled times? And that real Christians have every reason to be alarmed by the degenerates?

In Christ

I do agree with that.

[Brother Harold Porter]

Originally Posted by curtisedwardgrice

I do agree with that.

Nice, and thank you. But it's not so much a thing to agree with as it is a call to action, to witness for Jesus Christ, as my Dear Sister did in her post. You DO know that she spent two weeks composing a post that is truly excellent, after some editing by the elders of the church?

How do you personally see the unsaved scum, spastics and losers that decide to be autistiscal? Would you share a love seat in Heaven with them? Can you imagine the smell?

No thanks!

In Christ

[curtisedwardgrice (Quarantined)]

Originally Posted by Brother Harold Porter

Nice, and thank you. But it's not so much a thing to agree with as it is a call to action, to witness for Jesus Christ, as my Dear Sister did in her post. You DO know that she spent two weeks composing a post that is truly excellent, after some editing by the elders of the church?

How do you personally see the unsaved scum, spastics and losers that decide to be autistiscal? Would you share a love seat in Heaven with them? Can you imagine the smell?

No thanks!

In Christ

they need to get right with Jesus or burn in he'll I won't be anywhere near them.

[curtisedwardgrice (Quarantined)]

I wish to make amends, and join God's favorite church and forum.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Originally Posted by curtisedwardgrice

they need to get right with Jesus or burn in he'll I won't be anywhere near them.

What a riveting testimony! I too look forward to your essay! If it's anything like your introduction thread, I think we can expect great spiritual adventure, danger, intrigue, deception, redemption, and oh my, the list goes on!

[Retrovir]

hello there and welcome

[curtisedwardgrice (Quarantined)]

Originally Posted by Retrovir

hello there and welcome

Hello

[Basilissa]

Originally Posted by curtisedwardgrice

im well aware that what i said is not in the Bible it's my take on it how I feel about it

So now I know for sure you are going to Hell.

Deuteronomy 4:2 Ye shall not add unto the word which I command you, neither shall ye diminish ought from it, that ye may keep the commandments of the Lord your God which I command you.

Psalm 19:7 The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul: the testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple.

Proverbs 30:5-6
5 Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
6 Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.

Revelation 22:18-19
18 For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book, If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book:
19 And if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life, and out of the holy city, and from the things which are written in this book.

You are nothing but a liar, Curtis (see Proverbs 30:6 above). A fraud. And you, yourself, have admitted that publicly.

I will pray that you repent for you lies and accept Jesus. Reading the Bible (which you still seem to be unfamiliar with) would be the perfect first step on your road to redemption.

[MitzaLizalor]

One integral part of God's love and about Jesus dying for our sins is the rejection of that love by His once chosen people. This is not an opinion I just cooked up, it's a simple statement of fact recorded for us in The Bible. Jesus explains:

Matthew 21:42-45 Jesus saith unto them, Did ye never read in the scriptures The stone which the builders rejected, the same is become the head of the corner: this is the Lord's doing, and it is marvellous in our eyes? Therefore say I unto you, The kingdom of God shall be taken from you, and given to a nation bringing forth the fruits thereof. And whosoever shall fall on this stone shall be broken: but on whomsoever it shall fall, it will grind him to powder. And when the chief priests and Pharisees had heard his parables, they perceived that he spake of them.

Now the wretched priests and Pharisees might have yawned a bit, said in silly voices ‘‘.The kingdom of G-d shall be taken from you & given to a nation bringing forth the fruits thereof.’’ dancing around in little circles mocking; it wouldn't surprise me at all because they sure got in with the mockery later as Jesus died. You will be familiar with the passage of course. But forgive my ignorance, I still can't recall everything you've contributed regarding Mrs Job? Please refresh my memory.

I'm aware that within the defunct religious tradition taken away by Jesus, exactly as He said He would and very thorough He was too, there were mutterings about her and speculation concerning whether the original version gave birth to all the subsequent children or not. There could have been a new Mrs Job to go with the new children. You already appreciate that concubines were an option for Job so I won't pursue that line but must insist that you quote sources (and a newspaper is not a source) for your claims.

Without The Bible we'd have no knowledge about Jesus or why His death was necessary or why Redemption was taken away from one national group and offered, as Salvation, to us. If there's a mistake in The Bible about Job, how should I decide whether Jesus was also a mistake? What about Moses? Is there a missing section where he recommends back-to-back 96-hour orgies adoring golden warthogs and got the irrits when libidinous Israelites misunderstood and made a golden calf instead? Perhaps it's in the source where God doesn't do a deal with Satan. What else is in there? When posting that material, feel free to use original languages if translation obscures the kernel of truth you are showing me. I'm quite happy to receive raw kernels at any time.




1. Psalm 118:21-23 .-.. Acts 4:10-12

2. Matthew 27:41-43 .. Mark 15:31-32