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Default URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-08-2022, 08:26 AM

Please help! As I'm sure you've heard, I've recently suffered some financial setbacks. The moratorium on evictions that had been in effect during the pandemic expired, and I lost my housing.

More recently, my car, which I had been living in, was towed and impounded. And I have lost my job.

Therefore, I need to immediately change the amount of my automatic debit for my monthly tithe, in order to prevent my checking account from being overdrawn.

However, when I log into the Web portal for tithing and try to change my monthly tithe amount, after I enter the new amount, I am unable to save the change.

What am I doing wrong?

Please help. I need to fix this within 48 hours to prevent my bank account from being drained.


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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-08-2022, 11:26 AM

It is unusual, to say the least, to wish to give LE$$ to God. Perhaps you feel that He has "let you down" in some way? God does not do this. Rest assured that God never gives you more than you can bear, and this period in your life is merely a test of your character and Faith both of which will emerge strengthened.

Gird your loins and go forth confident in the knowledge that you are valuable in Gods eyes* and need have no worries if you apply yourself.

See how things go for a week or so and if, after that time, you are still having difficulties, make an appointment to speak with a Pastor.

*Lu:12:7: But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows.





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Jesus Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-08-2022, 12:35 PM

I do not get it.

The less you have, the more you need to give. Those with nothing, if they give a lot to The Church, it shows just how sincere they are in their devotion.
A man with millions, giving a million is not as significant as a man with nothing giving $11.
God checks the books. He knows if you are willing to fully commit to your True Salvation™.

The Devil gives excuses. Christians give cash.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-08-2022, 12:35 PM

Faith Machine, you need to make as large a seed of faith tithe to the church as you can, and then some. The Bible demands that poor people give everything to the church without worrying about how they will be able to live. God needs your money more than you do:

And Jesus sat over against the treasury, and beheld how the people cast money into the treasury: and many that were rich cast in much. And there came a certain poor widow, and she threw in two mites, which make a farthing. And he called unto him his disciples, and saith unto them, Verily I say unto you, That this poor widow hath cast more in, than all they which have cast into the treasury: For all they did cast in of their abundance; but she of her want did cast in all that she had, even all her living. Mark 12:41-45

...Ye cannot serve God and mammon. Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? Matthew 6:24-25


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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-08-2022, 03:10 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WWJDnow View Post
Faith Machine, you need to make as large a seed of faith tithe to the church as you can, and then some. The Bible demands that poor people give everything to the church without worrying about how they will be able to live. God needs your money more than you do:
And Jesus sat over against the treasury, and beheld how the people cast money into the treasury: and many that were rich cast in much. And there came a certain poor widow, and she threw in two mites, which make a farthing. And he called unto him his disciples, and saith unto them, Verily I say unto you, That this poor widow hath cast more in, than all they which have cast into the treasury: For all they did cast in of their abundance; but she of her want did cast in all that she had, even all her living. Mark 12:41-45
...Ye cannot serve God and mammon. Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? Matthew 6:24-25
Along with our Pastor Zeke, the Godly Rev. Robert Tilton is good at explaining why you need to keep tithing. You have to let prosperity find you. In this video Rev. Tilton explains you have to "get rid of the old to make room for the new." Please watch all of it and report to us how, because of your tithe, God brought prosperity back to you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Unhqk-sAtZ4


Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-08-2022, 05:25 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
However, when I log into the Web portal for tithing and try to change my monthly tithe amount, after I enter the new amount, I am unable to save the change.

What am I doing wrong?
What you're doing wrong is trying to change the amount in the wrong direction. If you log into the tithing "portal", as you call it, and enter an amount higher than before, I think you'll find it saves the change correctly every time.

I hope this helps, dear?


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Jesus Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-08-2022, 05:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Please help! As I'm sure you've heard, I've recently suffered some financial setbacks. The moratorium on evictions that had been in effect during the pandemic expired, and I lost my housing.

More recently, my car, which I had been living in, was towed and impounded. And I have lost my job.

Therefore, I need to immediately change the amount of my automatic debit for my monthly tithe, in order to prevent my checking account from being overdrawn.
Dear help us, Miss Faith. You are sounding like quite the dramatic actress here. Oh, yes; I am sure that you are facing some tough times, just like so many people. But, now is not the time to turn your back on the Living .

Why not pull yourself up and honor the in ALL that you do? Let see that you live up to your name. I'm sure that you are well aware of how He feels about withholding money from :

Malachi 3:8 "Will a man rob ? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings."

And, when you do give to the full amount that He is owed, then He will bless you, abundantly — and beyond belief!

Malachi 3:10 "Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it."

And, if you do not give that which is truly owed, then be prepared for a response from Heaven!
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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-08-2022, 05:54 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
What you're doing wrong is trying to change the amount in the wrong direction. If you log into the tithing "portal", as you call it, and enter an amount higher than before, I think you'll find it saves the change correctly every time.
I hope this helps, dear?
To Faith_Machine, our dear friend and special person in LBC, I hope you have not lost your Bible while living in your car. Dig it out you will find help in 2 Corinthians 9:7, "God loves a cheerful giver."


Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-08-2022, 07:56 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Please help! As I'm sure you've heard, I've recently suffered some financial setbacks. The moratorium on evictions that had been in effect during the pandemic expired, and I lost my housing.
as many have faced that, I feel the pain.

Quote:
More recently, my car, which I had been living in, was towed and impounded.
That sucks. I hope they did not take affront to the ¨Candy¨ sign on the side. Than might land you into some hot water.

Quote:
Therefore, I need to immediately change the amount of my automatic debit for my monthly tithe, in order to prevent my checking account from being overdrawn.
This problem is easy to solve: Just stay under the radar of the pastors here. They never caught me.
Quote:
However, when I log into the Web portal for tithing and try to change my monthly tithe amount, after I enter the new amount, I am unable to save the change.

What am I doing wrong?

Please help. I need to fix this within 48 hours to prevent my bank account from being drained.
I am pretty sure both me and Joanna Lytton-Vasey gave differing but viable options to your plight


Kind regards, Roland


Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.

Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.

Last edited by Roland; 05-08-2022 at 09:22 PM.
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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-08-2022, 09:57 PM

I'm thinking about launching a GoFundMe to get my car out of the tow yard, but GoFundMe takes fifteen percent of every donation for themselves. Would people be open to sending me their contributions directly?


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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-08-2022, 10:06 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Would people be open to sending me their contributions directly?
The pastors might do that. I just get whacked over the head for merely showing up. It is not that bad because they tend to miss.


Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.

Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.
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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-09-2022, 05:01 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
More recently, my car, which I had been living in, was towed and impounded. And I have lost my job.

Therefore, I need to immediately change the amount of my automatic debit for my monthly tithe, in order to prevent my checking account from being overdrawn.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
See how things go for a week or so and if, after that time, you are still having difficulties, make an appointment to speak with a Pastor.

*Lu:12:7: But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows.

That does seem problematic. Have you thought about asking your bank for a personal line of credit or using your credit card for a cash advance? Though the interest rates are steep, that may solve your immediate problem of pending overdraft, then I'm certain sometime in the coming weeks if a pastor deems you deserve the money back you'll get it back.

Who knows, you might even get a nice bonus back for your faith. Pastor Ezekiel has always been a boundless fountain of generosity with those who deserve it.
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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-09-2022, 09:03 AM

You can't. But I can. Your tithe amount will be changed on June 1st 2022 based on your previous tithing and whining. The new amount will be your previous amount+66.6%.

Alternatively, I've signed on your behalf a binding military contract to join the Russian special troops to fight the Nazis. There's a lot of cleanin' the boys' and entertainin' 'em to be done to keep the morale up for Jesus. Them amber treasures won't walk to the Flint Mansion on their own but need some encouraging. That option will increase your tithe amount by only 33.3%.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-09-2022, 06:55 PM

Oh God, oh God, oh God, as of this morning my bank account is overdrawn, and they are hitting me with a very large overdraft fee.

At this point, any kind donations you all are good enough to send me would first have to get my balance to $0.00 before I could even access any donations on top of that.

Please, please, please send whatever you can.

Please help me, it's been extremely cold these last few nights:

Anomalously cold temperatures grip the San Francisco Bay Area as a slight chance of rain lingers


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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-09-2022, 09:07 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
I'm thinking about launching a GoFundMe to get my car out of the tow yard, but GoFundMe takes fifteen percent of every donation for themselves. Would people be open to sending me their contributions directly?
What do we use as an address? Your license plate?





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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-10-2022, 10:34 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Oh God, oh God, oh God, as of this morning my bank account is overdrawn, and they are hitting me with a very large overdraft fee.

At this point, any kind donations you all are good enough to send me would first have to get my balance to $0.00 before I could even access any donations on top of that.

Please, please, please send whatever you can.

Please help me, it's been extremely cold these last few nights:

Anomalously cold temperatures grip the San Francisco Bay Area as a slight chance of rain lingers
Have you considered moving? Tithing would still be possible in Euros & Swiss Francs (or Krugerrands if that's more convenient for you) but if you're driving, I'm not sure what road access is like to Greenland. There's a ferry to Iceland and probably something to get you to the Shetlands or Fair Isle. The eastern parts of Svalbard are also looking for new blood, so I've heard. Tithing remains possible there in Krona, no need for anxiety in that respect.
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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-10-2022, 12:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Oh God, oh God, oh God, as of this morning my bank account is overdrawn, and they are hitting me with a very large overdraft fee.

At this point, any kind donations you all are good enough to send me would first have to get my balance to $0.00 before I could even access any donations on top of that.

Please, please, please send whatever you can.

Please help me, it's been extremely cold these last few nights:

Anomalously cold temperatures grip the San Francisco Bay Area as a slight chance of rain lingers
Maybe it's time to let that bank go and declare bankruptcy? If Trump can do it why not you?


Sure, they can dock official over the table wages but not if you have no wages to dock.


Maybe you can find one of those under the table cash jobs like all those illegal immigrants. I'm sure the pastors can come up with some alternative payment methods. You can cheat the IRS and your debtors but not God.
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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-10-2022, 02:28 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Prayer Warrior View Post
Maybe it's time to let that bank go and declare bankruptcy? If Trump can do it why not you?
Sure, they can dock official over the table wages but not if you have no wages to dock.
Maybe you can find one of those under the table cash jobs like all those illegal immigrants. I'm sure the pastors can come up with some alternative payment methods. You can cheat the IRS and your debtors but not God.
If our dear friend Faith takes out bankruptcy his remaining assets will be taken, sold and the proceeds divided among those to whom he owes money. We at Landover Baptist must use our sharp elbows to be first in line to collect his tithe.


Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-10-2022, 04:43 PM

I'm not merely sitting here drinking my Crystal Champagne (1971), I am actively thinking of solutions: Is selling oneself into indentured labor still an option in this country or have the democrats banned it?





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Default Re: URGENT: How do I change my tithe amount? - 05-10-2022, 06:53 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
...Is selling oneself into indentured labor still an option in this country or have the democrats banned it?
Unsure, but it wouldn't really help FM in this case. Yes, he could put that towards this month's tithe, but he can't go selling himself again to pay next month's, can he?


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