[Professor Bessemer]

I’m sorry I have not been on these Godly forums much in the last couple of days, but the Scientheistic Community has been in a bit of a state. As I am sure you all realize, Michael Jackson was the Weirdest Person in the World before God sent him to Hell. But what most people do not know is that he was so much weirder than everyone else, we never bothered to figure out who was the Second Weirdest Person in the World.

And when I say “we” I mean the American Scientheist Special Council on Weirdness of which I am a leading member. As one of my colleagues said yesterday, “We really dropped the ball on this one! I thought we had five, maybe ten years before that freak would drop! This is awful.”

It has been a real scramble trying to come up with a new Weirdest Person in the World. These are the four frontrunners right now, in no particular order. They are nowhere near as weird as Michael Jackson, but as I said earlier, he was exceptionally weird. He may have been the weirdest person ever, but that is for history and God to judge.



First we have Dennis Avner, who prefers to be called Stalking Cat. This walking nightmare did this to himself on purpose. The Bible of course prohibits tattoos and “cuttings of the flesh”.

Dennis Avner, 50, is descended from American Indians, and has spent 'an uncalculated amount' of money on making himself look like a big cat, after a discussion with a Native chief who inspired him to 'follow the ways of the tiger'.

Avner's body modification operations have included bifurcation (splitting) of his upper lip, surgical pointing of the ears, sillicone cheek and forehead implants, tooth filing, tattoos, and facial piercings - to which whiskers can be attached.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1052934/Cat-Man--human-tiger-enjoys-climbing-trees-eats-raw-meat-day.html


++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ++++++++++

Next we have Walter Mercado, a well known Latin Psychic and notorius weirdo. This person, who insists he is male, spits in God’s face daily by claiming “the stars” affect our daily lives! What a bunch of superstitious nonsense!

Here is a link to his website. It is all in Mexican so I have no idea what any of it says, but I’m sure it is all evil and against Jesus. All of the other websites that we have uncovered that mention “Mr.” Mercado are also in Mexican, so it very difficult to get any accurate information about him.

https://www.waltermercado.net/sp/index.php


++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ++++++++++


Our next complete weirdo is Genesis P-Orridge. I really don’t know where to start with this one. He has been mocking the Lord since the 1970’s.


He was in several punk rock bands where performing naked covered in one’s own blood and excrement was the considered “hip” and “with it”. Recently, he again decided to spit in God’s face when he decided he needed larger fake breasts! You read that correctly, he is a man with breasts!

In this photo, he is pictured with his wife who Jesus sent to Hell in 2007.

Throbbing Gristle’s Genesis P-Orridge has submitted to a series of plastic surgery sessions to get breast implantation in the last few weeks. The surgery procedures involved minor liposuction on the waist and a replacement of his former breast implants, which were enlarged to a 38 “D” size . . . In 2003 Genesis changed his name to Genesis Breyer P-Orridge and began a performance series called Breaking Sex that was initiated by both he and Lady J. Breyer. This project is about re-union and re-solution of male and female to a perfecting hermaphroditic state and has been named Pandrogeny by P-Orridge.

Here is a link to his website. Do not click it unless you have your KJAV 1611 by your side

http://www.genesisp-orridge.com/


++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ++++++++++


Our final candidate is Buck Angel, who calls himself a Transman Pornstar. I don’t have to much to say about this one except this person is a woman, she has a vagina.

I will not be posting a link to this person’s website for obvious reasons.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Hmmm. I don't see Ratzi the Nazi on this list. The "pope" is an aging man who goes around wearing a dress and trying to tear people away from Jesus! How much more weird can one get?!?

[Brother Lazarus]

I vote for Walter Mercado. The choices are limited but Jackson was so incredibly weird there really is no second choice. Ozzie Osborne is pretty weird. Was he considered as a finalist?

I would have voted for Liberace if he was still alive.

Yours in Christ
Brother Lazarus

[SUV]

I nominate any or all non-God-Believing athian(s) in the world.

Imagine, having a Religion so weird as to Believe that there is no God in Heaven and that JESUS did not arise from the Dead!

[Professor Bessemer]

I am certainly open to suggestions from the True Christians™ here for other nominees. I will present them before the selection committee at our next meeting.

Please be prompt however, as not currently having a recognized Weirdest Person in the World has rocked the Scientheistic community to it's very core!

[Brother Lazarus]

Originally Posted by Professor Bessemer

I am certainly open to suggestions from the True Christians™ here for other nominees. I will present them before the selection committee at our next meeting.

Please be prompt however, as not currently having a recognized Weirdest Person in the World has rocked the Scientheistic community to it's very core!

How about M.P. Helmholtz? He's pretty weird.

I'll go ahead and submit Ozzie for consideration. Coutney Love is weird, so is Queen Elizabeth.

Yours in Christ
Brother Lazarus

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

David Gest ranks up there.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/top-sto...5875-18085842/

Weirdest, most worthless waste of skin, whichever.

How about David Icke, the one who thinks Reptilians rule the world. http://www.davidicke.com/

[Professor Bessemer]

All excellent suggestions, especially David Gest. There was some talk via text that he could crack the top five. Reverend Rodimer, for a non-Scientheistic expert, you have a keen eye for weirdos!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

I'm afraid you'll need to pull Dennis Avner from the list being considered. He is clearly a fraud.

Dennis Avner, 50, is descended from American Indians, and has spent 'an uncalculated amount' of money on making himself look like a big cat, after a discussion with a Native chief who inspired him to 'follow the ways of the tiger'.

As any True Christian™ American knows, there are not now nor have there ever been tigers in America. The man thing is obviously not an authentic injun.

[Mad Prophet Helmholtz]

Originally Posted by Brother Lazarus

How about M.P. Helmholtz? He's pretty weird.

I only appear weird because I present to you the unpalatable truth that everything you know in this universe is the result of psychic illusions projected from the mind of Ghost Shark lying dormant in the Mariana Trench and that SPACESHIP JESUS is going to land December 21, 2012 in fulfillment of my prophecies and the righteous and pure will be taken on board the spacecraft to live a life of eternal bliss while the damned remain behind on Earth in a post-apocalyptic wasteland being devoured by wild animals, raped by robots, and becoming slaves to evil Black people and mutant ants who force people to toil in underground mines.

[Brother Lazarus]

Originally Posted by Mad Prophet Helmholtz

I only appear weird because I present to you the unpalatable truth that everything you know in this universe is the result of psychic illusions projected from the mind of Ghost Shark lying dormant in the Mariana Trench and that SPACESHIP JESUS is going to land December 21, 2012 in fulfillment of my prophecies and the righteous and pure will be taken on board the spacecraft to live a life of eternal bliss while the damned remain behind on Earth in a post-apocalyptic wasteland being devoured by wild animals, raped by robots, and becoming slaves to evil Black people and mutant ants who force people to toil in underground mines.

I resubmit my suggestion that M.P. Helmholtz is the new weirded person on the planet.

Yours in Christ
Brother Lazarus

[James Hutchins]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

I'm afraid you'll need to pull Dennis Avner from the list being considered. He is clearly a fraud.

As any True Christian™ American knows, there are not now nor have there ever been tigers in America. The man thing is obviously not an authentic injun.

Though firewater could explain the stupidity of what he has done..... Does he make dreamcatchers that look like they were made by spiders on acid?

[Palmer C. Eldrich]

Frank Chu:
http://12galaxies.20m.com/

[BrotherBill]

Originally Posted by Professor Bessemer

Our final candidate is Buck Angel, who calls himself a Transman Pornstar. I don’t have to much to say about this one except this person is a woman, she has a vagina.

I do believe you posted the wrong picture. How silly

[H. Montague Worthington]

I would not be surprised if we found out that Barack HUSSEIN Obama sleeps in a hyperbaric chamber and consults a chimp on public policy.

[JennyD]

Originally Posted by BrotherBill

I do believe you posted the wrong picture. How silly

Why don't you Google "Buck Angel" and see what you find?

I did.

Lord, how I wish I could undo that! But at least I got to visit with my dinner a second time.


Warning: NSFW!

[Larry Lee]

Michael Jackson broke so much new ground when it comes to defining "weird," with the plasticity and mutability of his physical appearance being such a small part of it – because transmogrifying how he looked was obviously just a recreational pastime for him.

The truly weird understand these things.

What we should look for in the successor to the Jacksonian title of the "World's Weirdest Person" is someone who nonchalantly stands apart from their own "weird" activity – activity that causes the rest of us to recoil in stomach churning and intellectual revulsion from them. It's that exquisite failure to acknowledge their own "weirdness" that distinguishes those who do it best.

I'm thinking of mAnn Coulter as the prime example of the exquisitely weird. She's someone who walks among us, yet inhabits a universe we'd pay to avoid.

mAnn Coulter enjoys the immense popularity that Buck Angel cannot imagine.

mAnn Coulter enjoys the immense audience that poor hopeless Gen would cut off her dick to entertain.

mAnn Coulter flaunts her Adam's apple in a way that Dennis Avner's tattoos can never challenge.

mAnn Coulter wears a little black dress better than Walter Mercado could ever hope to, even when that dress is only hanging in the closet – Which is the darkest secret known to the truly, truly weird – that the accruements of "weird" can be taken off or put on at will, but the audience-at-large won't perceive a difference either way. Do you think that's easy to pull off? Ask Mercado if we would all puke at his appearance if he just wore Levis.

In short, our culture is currently hurting for a celebrity to fill the fulsome space left vacant by Michael's now-empty rhinestone glove, but I think Michael's heir could not be more apparent...

I submit for your vicarious thrill the brain-chortling weird and utterly singular mAnn Coulter.

Do I hear an AMEN, Somebody?!

[JennyD]

Is this mAnn Coulter some sort of transgendered freak who mocks the very Godly Ann Coulter, Brother?

[Patriarch Jon]

Consider adding Marilyn Manson and Alice Cooper for obvious reasons and Steve Jobs who is working on becoming an android, one part at a time.

[Nurse Clampett]

Pete Burns is also bizarre.