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Default Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 07-31-2020, 07:14 PM

My beloved Dr. Beezer's favorite past-times includes many things, at 98 he must keep active. Last night, he informed me over Zoom that he is planning an expedition to hunt this thing; an emotionally unstable whale with morbid tendencies of hauling her deceased whelp to and fro, before whoring off to create more.

His intentions are noble. He wishes to kill the beast to prove to bloody heart liberals what a dumb, useless thing whales are, and nothing to concern over. He hopes to grace the dessicated carcass suspected from the crystal dome of his manse's great hall, with the unborn calf fashioned into a delightful ottoman underneath.

He's hired a team of Icelandic experts to aid him in this endeavor, possibly to help keep his spear steady, and fire it, if need be in such a way to make it as though Dr. Beezer is practically doing it himself... which he is, though his hands are shaky (thus necessitating this.)

Please pray my Dr. B is victorious. Whales are dangerous, man-guzzling beasts.

Jonah: 1:17 Now the Lord had prepared a great fish to swallow up Jonah. And Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights.

Truly it is a heroic thing he's doing to make our seas a tad bit safer. May the Lord guide his successful hit on National Geographic's latest "It Girl"





Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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Default Re: Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 07-31-2020, 08:04 PM

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Originally Posted by DominiqueDomgaard View Post
fish
Where did your man get his education? Walmart drive-through schoolathon?


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 07-31-2020, 08:15 PM

He ordered it in a mailed catalog. Just like how he ordered me.




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Default Re: Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 07-31-2020, 08:29 PM

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Originally Posted by DominiqueDomgaard View Post
He ordered it in a mailed catalog. Just like how he ordered me.
Lucky for you that he did the latter before the Argos catalog was discontinued.

Now he'd have to look at you in the online catalog, where the poor quality of the cheap goods is even more obvious.


Revelation 21:8

But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Default Re: Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 07-31-2020, 08:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
Lucky for you that he did the latter before the Argos catalog was discontinued.

Now he'd have to look at you in the online catalog, where the poor quality of the cheap goods is even more obvious.


I possess many good qualities Mrs. Lytton-Vasey.

My looks are pure Nordic, and my chest is American made since 1987.


Quality.

Dr. Beezer has even offered to make further adjustments endearing compliments to keep me lovely for him and Jesus when we meet. (Again, an orderly may be needed to keep his hand steady for this. I trust him implicitly.)




Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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Default Re: Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 07-31-2020, 09:14 PM

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Originally Posted by DominiqueDomgaard View Post
I possess many good qualities Mrs. Lytton-Vasey.
I'm sure you do, dear. Perhaps one day we will see them.
Quote:
My looks are pure Nordic, and my chest is American made since 1987.
I don't wish to be overtly offensive, obviously, but you look strangely like a Finlandish. But if you've had your US-manufactured bosoms since 1987, I must admit you look pretty good for a woman who is approaching 50.


Revelation 21:8

But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Default Re: Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 07-31-2020, 09:25 PM

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Originally Posted by DominiqueDomgaard View Post
He ordered it in a mailed catalog. Just like how he ordered me.
I hope your husband who’s on his death bed that you’re taking advantage of kept the receipt. Illegals like you have no place in the US with your MS-13s and chain babies. Let me recite John 8:44 to describe you in detail. Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.
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Default Re: Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 08-01-2020, 01:27 AM

Gracious sakes alive! What have I missed here? I'm just back after spending a few days at the cottage with Agatha (my sister), in the Finger Lakes district. The weather was grand, and with the cottage being on the lake, we missed some of the oppressive heat. There, I don't bother with the computer, so I'm just now getting a chance to read up on the goings-on, here at -- and, what do I find, but this fishy fantasy!

Now, then, dear Miss Domgaard, this is certainly quite the situation that you're in. However, I think you're making much of a wee bit of fancying. And, I don't mean that on your part, but on the part of your beloved. At 98, Mr. B. might think he has valiant intentions by slaying his whale; but, I think that rather than worrying about him doing that, that you should seek medical advice for him, regarding the probable effects from dementia. Quick sticks -- not a moment to lose, dear one!


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Default Re: Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 08-01-2020, 05:50 AM

You're just in time Mrs. White. Thank you for your words.

Though the conversation momentarily shifted from the whale to my chest (not my fault, completely) -- I would like to point this out --


Even if my dear, sweet Beezer has a touch of the dementia, who am I to question? He is a man after all. Is a man with dementia not still much wiser than a woman in general?

Proverbs 21:20 There is treasure to be desired and oil in the dwelling of the wise; but a foolish man spendeth it up.




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Bible Re: Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 08-01-2020, 02:04 PM

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Originally Posted by DominiqueDomgaard View Post
You're just in time Mrs. White. Thank you for your words.

Though the conversation momentarily shifted from the whale to my chest (not my fault, completely) -- I would like to point this out --

Even if my dear, sweet Beezer has a touch of the dementia, who am I to question? He is a man after all. Is a man with dementia not still much wiser than a woman in general?

Proverbs 21:20 There is treasure to be desired and oil in the dwelling of the wise; but a foolish man spendeth it up.
Oh, you're more than welcome, dear Miss Domgaard. As a senior lady at , I realize that it is my duty to advise, in the most appropriate manner possible, the younger womenfolk when in dire distress and needing assistance.

Titus 2:3-5:
3 The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;
4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,
5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

Now, regarding your statement about not questioning Mr. B. (because he is a man); well, yes, Dear, I can see your point here. But I must point out that as it appears your beloved has dementia (or, as some call it, "the second childhood"), he may pose a danger to himself, or to other people. Seeking medical advice for him would be only in his own best interest -- as his condition could simply worsen. Think of it this way: today, he wants to wrestle a whale. What will tomorrow bring? Perhaps he will think back to watching G.I. Joe episodes and then decide that he must engage the Chinese army in combat.

Oh, I do know that that might sound far-fetched, but it has happened before, Dear, and it can happen again. I shall leave this brief video clip here, as a reminder of the trials that other women have endured, due to older men pursuing similar, child-like fantasies:



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Default Re: Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 08-03-2020, 09:59 PM

I do reiterate the latent danger of whales -- this hapless tourist in Australia was recently crushed by a humpback whale. From the headline, I assumed he expired mid-coitus under a bikini-clad fattie, but nope, it was a real whale.

This menace species must be culled.




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Default Re: Pray my betrothed gets this whale - 08-03-2020, 11:36 PM

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, I assumed he expired mid-coitus under a bikini-clad fattie, but nope, it was a real whale.
Gosh, you really can't get your head out of the gutter, can you?

May I suggest less thinking about coitus and more about Jesus? Reading the Bible might help. (But avoid Song of Solomon).
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