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Devil Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-11-2010, 08:50 PM

The Game of Life



This devilish diversion simulates life from college to retirement. Players spin and land on "life events" such as "Move across country; Pay $10,000." How about some life events that children can actually learn from, like "Incur God's wrath by lingering on MSNBC while channel surfing; Die of AIDS"? Also, there is nothing in the Game of Life rulebook that prohibits plastic blue piece-plastic blue piece marriage. I am morally outraged!


Clue



The goal of this game is to collect clues and deduce which suspect murdered Mr. Boddy with which weapon and in what room. What's absurd is that there isn't a single minority represented in the game.



Normally I'm all for the exclusion of minorities, but let's face it: crimes are committed by Negroes and Mexicans. Miss Scarlet and Mrs. White should be Miss Tasheka and Mrs. Gonzales respectively. I don't need to roll any dice or draw any cards to figure this one out: J'waun killed Mr. Boddy, and he also used his "lead pipe" to rape Mrs. Peacock in the billiard room.


Monopoly



The sole objective of Monopoly is financial domination and the utter ruin of all competitors. Sounds like a game espousing American values that would get Jesus' stamp of approval. But hold on. One of the game pieces is a "Scottie"--a gay breed of dog from the even gayer country of Scotland, where men wear skirts and "blow" bagpipes.



Furthermore, there is an iron and a thimble, neither of which should be handled by a man under any circumstances lest he become "domesticated" (read as "queer"). How many male monopoly players have gone on to wear aprons, push vacuum cleaners, and blow bagpipes? It makes me shudder to guesstimate. The Parker brothers should have gone directly to jail for releasing this heinous game.


Operation



Players test their hand-eye coordination by extracting small plastic pieces from Hitler's naked body. That's obscene on many levels. Shame on the powers-that-be at Milton Bradley for glorifying Adolph Hitler. He was, after all, a Catholic. Perhaps you're thinking, "If that's Hitler, then where's his mustache?" The patient has been prepped for surgery, pinhead. It's been shaved.


Candyland



I find Candyland to be the gayest game around, and that's taking Care Bears: Calling All Care Bears into consideration.




Trivial Pursuit



The name Trivial Pursuit is a play on words, but it's also quite apt. Instead of being productive by reading the Bible or bashing gays or bashing gays with the Bible, players answer secular questions. The game does not deal with any information of use or import--only categories like "geography" and "science" are offered. If a player answers a question correctly, he or she gets a "pie." I find that very offensive, but not as offensive as the game board itself, which has some kind of sick Satanic/homosexual symbol:




Risk



My only real beef with Risk is that players are subjected to unGodly place names like Irkutsk, Kamchatka, and Quebec. I'd actually like to see this game revamped and called W.'s Risk. Rather than players taking over other countries by rolling higher than their opponents, they would instead ignore the United Nations, invade on the basis of phony reports, prematurely claim victory, and hire Halliburton for contract work so the vice-president can profit. Every turn players have to concoct reasons for their military conquests, such as "They have WMDs," ""We're fighting them there so we don't have to fight them here," or "We're spreading freedom." Praise Jesus! That's how you fight a war!
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-11-2010, 09:15 PM

Indeed Brother Hatchet. What about this disgusting game of chance?

Snakes and Ladders how can a Christian parent allow their children to play a game that is based on the roll of a dice? What does this teach our children? Rather then fear the Lord your God and pursue your life knowing that Gods plan is set in concrete, you allow your children to determine their outcomes on the roll of dice. This silly type of game is just what Satan wants, his plan is make our children gamblers and whore mongers. This is where "chance" gets us:

1 Samuel 6:9
And see, if it goeth up by the way of his own coast to Bethshemesh, then he hath done us this great evil: but if not, then we shall know that [it is] not his hand that smote us: it was a chance that happened to us.
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-11-2010, 09:44 PM

Chess is another game which should not be allowed under the tree at Christmas. This is because of the hidden catolick message underlying the game. Think about it Bishop pieces that are more powerful in the game than the knights, the warriors of the game. Clearly this game was created to show that you cannot put your trust in soldiers but have to put it in the papal ways. Furthermore, the bishop piece has a pointy hat clearly a referance to bishops in the false religion of catolickism.

Plus the game was in Harry Potter, an obvious pagan book.




Genesis 4:12: When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.

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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-11-2010, 09:49 PM

You have a very good point there Brother Higgins and one that all should take notice of.
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-11-2010, 10:07 PM

I could not agree more Brother Hatchet, Satan has been shoving these obamanations through peoples throats for too long now.

Game of the Goose


This evil game teaches children that they can magically die and resurrect over and over again! These Gooses are insulting baby Jesus directly! It can be no coincidence that this is Hillary Clinton's favorite game!

The Settlers of Satan


This game falsely teaches innocent children that you can build a nation without killing unbelievers! Instead of killing Indians or Muslims, all one has to do is gather resources! As if the founding fathers created America by growing weed instead of killing Brits! It can be no coincidence that this is Bill Clinton's favorite game!


5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-11-2010, 10:29 PM

I've ordered 24 of these for my grandchildren. They need to know what life is really like.
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 01:17 AM

Would Monopoly be okay if you threw out the offending pieces?


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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 01:27 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BelieverInGod View Post
Would Monopoly be okay if you threw out the offending pieces?
Yes I would suspect that it would be okay then we could replace them with an American pit bull terrier, a chainsaw, and an intercontinental ballistic missile.


Remember this one thing brothers and sisters: KJV Proverbs 26:11 As a dog returneth to his vomit,
so a fool returneth to his folly
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 02:07 AM

I just checked my closet and I don't have any of those games. The only game I found was a backgammon set. I like backgammon a lot. It's a lot like life. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 02:21 AM

Any Dungeons and Dragons/Roleplaying Game



As we all know dungeons and dragons clearly is a path to pagan ritual and statanic sacrifice. It teaches children (and nerds) that the world is full of magic, dice, and debauchery. Furthermore, it shows that the world is inhabited by any number of fantasy creatures and can lead to suicide as this webcomic shows. Spoiler alert I wonder why the pastor did not stone the witch at the end? He obviously isnt doing his job. End Spoiler alert


Genesis 4:12: When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.

Numbers 35:19: The revenger of blood himself shall slay the murderer: when he meeteth him, he shall slay him.
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 02:56 AM

A very good point Brother Higgins and one that all Christians should take notice of.


Remember this one thing brothers and sisters: KJV Proverbs 26:11 As a dog returneth to his vomit,
so a fool returneth to his folly
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 03:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Master Gordon View Post
A very good point Brother Higgins and one that all Christians should take notice of.
I appreciate the agreeing but you know instead of putting a post where it just shows your approval what you could do is give approval by clicking on the little scales in the top right hand corner of the individual post.


Genesis 4:12: When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.

Numbers 35:19: The revenger of blood himself shall slay the murderer: when he meeteth him, he shall slay him.
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 04:02 AM

Need I say more?




And then there's this disaster:

Angel Wars

You and your opponent can play the game as angels vs. demons (meaning one of you has to be demons!) or angels vs. messenger angels (symbolizing another revolt in Heaven?!).

Quote:
The game begins with the game tiles set up in checkerboard design. You control the 6 guardian angels. Your opponent controls the 6 demons (or the 6 messenger angels if your opponent prefers not to play the demons). Players take turns moving, following the rules of movement, until one player has successfully moved all of his/her pieces to the opposite sides of the board.


The makers of this game will doubtless learn all about demons . . . in Hell!


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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 04:35 AM

These are all satanic laden games I will never allow into a house of mine, there is one game that has yet to be mentioned and it is probably the most satanic game of all time, and Im sure that just by rule of thumb the name of this demonic device should not ever be mentioned, and am choosing not to post it's name due to the extreme hate and gastronomical number of possessions that have occured while playing this game which is better described as Toy's R Us's satan in a box. Anyone who plays this immediately send's theyre soul to Hell and they are taken over by a demon for the rest of their lively days to ruin the work of God


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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 04:36 AM

This one boils my bottom. It's number one in chinkland.




And don't you know the queers are doing all they can to ruin "family game night" with this abomination.



Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 04:40 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Higgins View Post
I appreciate the agreeing but you know instead of putting a post where it just shows your approval what you could do is give approval by clicking on the little scales in the top right hand corner of the individual post.
I have done so for a number of other posts and alas I ran out of approvals for the day. As well as that I like to share my approval with everyone.

Yours in Christ....


Remember this one thing brothers and sisters: KJV Proverbs 26:11 As a dog returneth to his vomit,
so a fool returneth to his folly
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 04:45 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
And don't you know the queers are doing all they can to ruin "family game night" with this abomination.


Pastor, maybe we should buy some of those, add some more realistic cards, and return them to the store!

"Suffer prolapsed rectum after Palm Springs Phisting Phun Weekend. Pay $150,000 for surgery."

"Get beaten and gang-raped by well-meaning Christians trying to drive Satan from your colon. Suffer broken arm and collarbone. Lose six turns to recuperate."

"Contract AIDS. Go directly to Hell, burn forever."


Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 04:55 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
Pastor, maybe we should buy some of those, add some more realistic cards, and return them to the store!

"Suffer prolapsed rectum after Palm Springs Phisting Phun Weekend. Pay $150,000 for surgery."

"Get beaten and gang-raped by well-meaning Christians trying to drive Satan from your colon. Suffer broken arm and collarbone. Lose six turns to recuperate."

"Contract AIDS. Go directly to Hell, burn forever."
Excellent sugestion, Reverend. We could also insert the appropriate Chick Tract into each box.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 08:00 PM

What about the game of CHESS?


Despite the Queen being the most powerful piece, the King is the most IMPORTANT piece. It's a solid Good vs Evil type of game.
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Default Re: Board Games That Satan Wants to See Under Your Christmas Tree - 11-12-2010, 08:18 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ksevio View Post
What about the game of CHESS?


Despite the Queen being the most powerful piece, the King is the most IMPORTANT piece. It's a solid Good vs Evil type of game.
Couldn't be bothered to read the thread, could you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Higgins View Post
Chess is another game which should not be allowed under the tree at Christmas. This is because of the hidden catolick message underlying the game. Think about it Bishop pieces that are more powerful in the game than the knights, the warriors of the game. Clearly this game was created to show that you cannot put your trust in soldiers but have to put it in the papal ways. Furthermore, the bishop piece has a pointy hat clearly a referance to bishops in the false religion of catolickism.

Plus the game was in Harry Potter, an obvious pagan book.




Drama queen
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