[Daisy Mae Johnson]

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY GOD! Thank you for creating me!



HAPPY FATHER'S DAY DADDY! Remember when us kids would bring you ice cold beer on Father's Day because you worked so hard on the BBQ? Oh, how I miss those innocent days of youth. You were such a good Daddy and such a GOD fearing man. I LOVE YOU DADDY!

To ALL YOU DAD'S OUT THERE

I hope you have a wonderful Father's Day!

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Thanks dear sister. As you all know, I am the father of 4 children, at least from what I know. My eldest son was to be groomed to follow in my footsteps as a pastor, but committed suicide suddenly at the age of 24. As it turns out from the suicide letter, he was actively homosexual and engaged in a 2 year relationship with another man. It's a shame he couldn't have entered an ex-gay program, but on the bright side, at least he's not out there spreading the AIDS around on public toilet seats.

My eldest daughter totally rebelled. Got into the punk rock scene, environmentalist hippie crap. Haven't talked to her in years. Last I've heard, she was campaigning for Howard Dean in '04 and moved in with some hipster boyfriend who works at an Apple store.

My other son is currently in prison for manslaughter, kidnapping, and intent to distribute. He was such a great boy for a while. All-star on his football team. Then once in college, got involved in trafficking cocaine. Got greedy and some messy stuff went down with the Salvadoreans.

My youngest, my daughter is being raised by my ex-wife. I haven't seen her for years, and I'm not allowed to after that bogus kangaroo court that ordered me to stay away from her and my ex-wife. Fairy tale nonsense about pulling a gun on them and raping my wife in front of my daughter. Just the ravings of a hysterical harpie.

All in all, I would consider myself a great father, even if all my children turned out wrong.

[Sister Kitty]

Originally Posted by Rev. Jim Osborne

Thanks dear sister. As you all know, I am the father of 4 children,

Dear Lord! Only 4 children? And only 2 of them sons!? What sin did you commit in your younger days to make Jesus afflict you with a barren wife and two daughters? My heart weeps at the suffering you have endured, brother. But the Lord is righteous and always has His reasons for the suffering He inflicts. Because He loves us and is our Father.

Hebrews 12

7If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not?
8But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons.



So what sin did you commit to be punished with only 2 sons? It must have been a grievous sin indeed.

[Zechariah Smyth]

Rev. Jim, you simply can't judge the parent by looking at the children, in fact it's patently unfair. It would be like judging God by looking at His children: can you imagine if our perception of Him depended on observing (for example) Freddie Mercury, Slick Willie "Clinton" or Liza Minnelli? That would hardly be fair.

And imagine how much WORSE they would've turned out without the firm hand of a Christian father? Scary!!!

So, Happy Fathers' Day to you, Sir, for a job well done!

YiC,

Zech
Posted via Mobile Device

[Nobar King]

I was disturbed by how little respect my neighbors had for our Heavenly Father on father's day, they carried on all day long making all kinds of racket, honking horns and ringing bells and shouting "Happy father's day" all day long to the different fathers on our street.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Originally Posted by Rev. Jim Osborne

Thanks dear sister. As you all know, I am the father of 4 children, at least from what I know. My eldest son was to be groomed to follow in my footsteps as a pastor, but committed suicide suddenly at the age of 24. As it turns out from the suicide letter, he was actively homosexual and engaged in a 2 year relationship with another man. It's a shame he couldn't have entered an ex-gay program, but on the bright side, at least he's not out there spreading the AIDS around on public toilet seats.

My eldest daughter totally rebelled. Got into the punk rock scene, environmentalist hippie crap. Haven't talked to her in years. Last I've heard, she was campaigning for Howard Dean in '04 and moved in with some hipster boyfriend who works at an Apple store.

My other son is currently in prison for manslaughter, kidnapping, and intent to distribute. He was such a great boy for a while. All-star on his football team. Then once in college, got involved in trafficking cocaine. Got greedy and some messy stuff went down with the Salvadoreans.

My youngest, my daughter is being raised by my ex-wife. I haven't seen her for years, and I'm not allowed to after that bogus kangaroo court that ordered me to stay away from her and my ex-wife. Fairy tale nonsense about pulling a gun on them and raping my wife in front of my daughter. Just the ravings of a hysterical harpie.

All in all, I would consider myself a great father, even if all my children turned out wrong.

Rev. Osborne,

You are an excellent Father. I'm sure your children's short-comings were all caused by their Mothers. Your ex-wives were all a little ditzy and whorish.

I hope the next Mrs. Osborne is young and can bare you 4 more children. Maybe this batch will turn out better.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

I have fathered seven children with my late ex-wife Ethel, and have one on the way with my current wife Cindy Lou. Four of my children with Ethel were female, so I gave them up for adoption. After all, what good are daughters anyway? Lot may have found a use for them, but they bleed all over the place, and most of them turn into coke snorting lesbians in their early tweens. My three boys are very well behaved. They stay in their rooms reading the Bible, or they train in manly activities such as shooting guns, chopping wood, and beating their mother.

1 Corinthians 11:3
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.


1 Timothy 2:12 (King James Version) 12But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.