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Default WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 01-29-2012, 05:31 AM

Somebody just brought this to my attention. Look at how chummy Mrs. Phelps and that little tulip are:



Quite frankly, I'm not quite sure how to feel about this. Do we give her credit for loving the sinner despite her professed hatred for the sin?

Or is she just a big hypocrite, rebuking fags during they day and then giving them aid and succor behind closed doors?

I suppose we could say she's just showing proper hospitality, as outlined in the Bible:

Quote:
1 Peter 4:9

Use hospitality one to another without grudging.

What do you all think about this? I encounter a lot of gay men when I'm preaching in the streets. Do you think it would be a valid soul-winning tactic for me to invite them to come back to my place so I can cook them dinner? I've got this rump roast in the fridge right now that's just going to go to waste if I don't find somebody to share it with me.


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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 01-29-2012, 08:16 PM

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Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Do you think it would be a valid soul-winning tactic for me to invite them to come back to my place so I can cook them dinner?
Well, whenever we go down to the gay bar in Des Moines to preach to the dirty sinners, I always see Pastor Zeke leave earlier with a young man or two that he's managed to convert and wants to pray with in private (or so he tells me).
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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 01-29-2012, 10:34 PM

Shirley's liberal Marxist hatred for America worries me, no end.

"Police alleged that she allowed her son to trample an American flag"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shirley_Phelps-Roper
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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 01-30-2012, 03:33 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher View Post
Well, whenever we go down to the gay bar in Des Moines to preach to the dirty sinners, I always see Pastor Zeke leave earlier with a young man or two that he's managed to convert and wants to pray with in private (or so he tells me).
True, Brother Basher. Some of them make me gag, but I persevere. Jesus expects no less.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 01-30-2012, 04:50 AM

Well I've got a couple of queers in my dining room right now, waiting for me to serve them my signature savory rump roast. I figure I'll start working the topic of their salvation into the conversation some time before dessert.


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Default 01-30-2012, 06:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Well I've got a couple of queers in my dining room right now, waiting for me to serve them my signature savory rump roast. I figure I'll start working the topic of their salvation into the conversation some time before dessert.
You are braver than I, Faith_Machine.

While serving your rump roast to those no good chocolate commandos is very True Chritian (The liberal soul shall be made fat: and he that watereth shall be watered also himself. Proverbs 11:25) I fear the rectal warriors intend to castigate your households colons with their members of Molech.

I pray you escaped this fate.

Praise Jesus!
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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 01-30-2012, 08:14 PM

Er, has any heard from Faith_Machine today?
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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 01-30-2012, 09:32 PM

Good morning, brothers and sisters! My memory of last night is kind of hazy...


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Default 01-31-2012, 08:31 PM

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Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Good morning, brothers and sisters! My memory of last night is kind of hazy...
Thank Jesus you are safe.

And do not worry as long as you followed the KJV and feared God no harm can come to you.

2 Kings 17:39 But the LORD your God you shall fear; and He will deliver you from the hand of all your enemies.”

Have a good sit down, you'll be fine.
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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 02-01-2012, 01:28 AM

Thanks Larni! Those fellows must have really enjoyed my rump roast, because they even licked the platter clean!


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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 02-01-2012, 07:48 PM

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Good morning, brothers and sisters! My memory of last night is kind of hazy...
You didn't leave your drink unattended around them, did you?

Or at any point did one of them ask you whether his hankie smelled like chloroform to you?


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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 02-01-2012, 11:13 PM

I...

I honestly don't remember.


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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 02-02-2012, 02:35 AM

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Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
I...

I honestly don't remember.
Any discomfort while sitting or swallowing?


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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 02-02-2012, 02:49 AM

Now that you mention it, I have had a sore throat for the last 24 hours or so. I just figured it was cold and flu season...


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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 02-02-2012, 09:18 PM

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Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Now that you mention it, I have had a sore throat for the last 24 hours or so. I just figured it was cold and flu season...
Could be the AIDS!


Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 02-02-2012, 11:12 PM

Hmmm...

I really don't want to go into one of those sex clinics to get checked for the AIDS. I'll try praying it away first!


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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 02-05-2012, 12:56 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Hmmm...

I really don't want to go into one of those sex clinics to get checked for the AIDS. I'll try praying it away first!
If you need a prayer towel, please let me know. I have a ton of them.


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Didymus Much Didymus Much is offline
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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 02-05-2012, 01:26 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Hmmm...

I really don't want to go into one of those sex clinics to get checked for the AIDS. I'll try praying it away first!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Youth Minister Harry View Post
If you need a prayer towel, please let me know. I have a ton of them.
You really got screwed on that deal, huh, Harry?

But nvm that for now. What Faith_Machine really needs are some of my new, improved "Faith" Rocks™.

Now I know what you're thinking, "'Faith' rocks, sure, Didy. What do you think we're gullible or something? Those are just ordinary pebbles."

Well, friends, that's the beauty of my new product. You get all the renowned effectiveness of ordinary "Faith" Rocks™, but in a smaller concentrated form, that's easier to carry around with you (and a lot cheaper for me to ship).

Just slip a couple of these in a pocket or purse, and I guarantee the healing powers of your "Faith" Rocks™ will begin to work immediately!

And if you act in the next 90 minutes, I'll double your order! That's right, FOUR "Faith" Rocks™ for the price of only two.

PM me with payment/shipping details now!


RIP RBG
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Default Re: WBC's Shirley Phelps is a Queer Lover - 02-05-2012, 03:23 AM

So I bumped into my friends from the other night, and they assured me no funny business went on at all. It seems my memory loss was a result of me accidentally drinking a bottle of what I thought was non-alcoholic sparkling apple cider; it was actually champagne.

This all comes as quite a relief to me, as I'd already spoken to the folks at the sex clinic about swallowing some post-exposure prophylactics. That would have made me feel dirty, because the only people I ever heard of who swallowed condoms were drug mules.


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