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Default Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-20-2008, 06:18 AM

Dear Friends,

Although this is a problem of which I have been relieved by my conversion to eunuchdom, I fear that many of our brothers and sister remain in thrall to the demon MASTURBATION. Just today, a female member of our congregation confided in me that she intended to spend all afternoon playing her "djuidoo." While I tried to convince her that she should djuidon't, I fear that she may have given in to the many-fingered self-lust that stunts the sexual development of so many Christian youths.

And so, I ask you to join me in the following prayer, and mention those poor afflicted souls for whom you particularly pray:

Dear Lord, who never improperly handled your own blessed genitals, we ask that your great self-control be a shining model unto others, who in treacherous sexual self-dealings have stimulated their orifices and glands with lascivious thoughts and deeds. We pray not only for those who use pornographic materials such as may be found at most Indian-run bodegas, but also for those who misuse lingere catalogs, childern's television shows, and pulsing shower heads. Grant that they who engorge and relieve like so many brute animals be filled instead with your grace, and spooge and cream no more, their hot fluttering fingers, racing pulse, and million spasming muscles being replaced by a mind and body dedicated to mortification and prayer.

Yours in Him,
bab
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-20-2008, 06:29 AM

Indeed one's hands should be firmly clasped together in the faithful pose of the truly penitent not clasped about one's offending naughty bits.



To you agents of false religions and atheists...
Proverbs 16:2
All the ways of a man are clean in his own eyes; but the Lord weigheth the spirits.
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-20-2008, 07:06 AM

As I lie in my bed, curlers snugly wrapped around my locks, I do like to spare a moment of thought for these poor people. I'll write this prayer down and muse over it next time I'm in bed praying.
Thankyou Bab!


"She was of a great age, and had lived with a husband seven years from her virginity; And she was a widow of about fourscore and four years, which departed not from the temple, but served God with fastings and prayers night and day" - Luke 2:36-37
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-20-2008, 08:21 AM

God Bless You Brother BaBs! You have performed a very important service by opening up this discussion and using your own past history of vile debauchery as a shining example for all to see.

I'd also like to share with the good menfolk reading this thread who sincerely desire to cease their disgusting habit to consider this device, conveniently for sale at the Landover Baptist Gift Shoppe at an affordable price.



Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 10:46 AM


Masturbation: God's Great Gift to Us

The subject of masturbation is the cause of much concern and confusion among Christians. Most of us are taught that masturbation is sinful or wrong, and many believe that the Bible actually forbids masturbation. The latter is simply untrue; masturbation is not even mentioned in the Bible. And when we consider the facts, it becomes clear that masturbation is not a sin, but rather a blessing from God that enables us to fully enjoy our bodies and can help us lead a more healthy spiritual life. Masturbating for the Glory of God
Some people say that they feel guilty, shameful, or dirty after they masturbate, and so they conclude that masturbation must be a sin. This is just because most of us have been taught, often by misguided religious authorities, that our bodies are bad and anything relating to physical pleasure is sinful. This is simply not true, and this is not what God intended for us. God created our bodies, along with our capacity for sexual pleasure and orgasm. Masturbation is just a normal release of sexual energy, and if used properly, it can help keep us healthy physically and spiritually.
The Scripture tells us that our bodies are the temples of the Holy Spirit, and that everything that we do should glorify the Lord. While masturbation is not a sin, we must be careful to masturbate in a way that is respectful to our bodies, and respectful to God. Masturbation is a gift that we should not abuse. This means we should not masturbate to excess, or to the point where we injure ourselves. If you are masturbating until you are exhausted, or until your genitals are raw or bleeding, this is excessive, harmful, and not what God intended. If you masturbate compulsively to the point that it interferes with your work or your relationships with friends, family, and God, this is a problem. If you masturbate while indulging in impure thoughts (fantasizing about your neighbor’s wife, for example), this is also a misuse of God’s gift. Of course, this is not to say that masturbation in itself is wrong – simply that we must use masturbation in a way that is healthy and responsible.

Masturbation: God’s Gift to Us
Most discussions of masturbation don’t even touch on the multitude of ways that masturbating can contribute to our physical, emotional, and moral health. Here are just a few of the many ways that masturbation is beneficial:
  • It prevents sexually transmitted diseases. Masturbation is the safest form of safe sex. You can’t catch or spread any STDs when you masturbate.
  • It prevents unwanted pregnancies. By masturbating instead of having intercourse, couples – both married and unmarried – can avoid the dilemma of an unwanted or unplanned pregnancy. If birth control is not available, masturbation is a wise alternative to unprotected sex.
  • It’s an alternative to premarital sex. Masturbation provides an alternative to intercourse before marriage. It allows both partners to keep their virginity intact for their wedding night.
  • It’s an alternative to sinful behavior such as adultery. If a man or woman is tempted to indulge in adulterous sex, for example, masturbating is a much better alternative to committing a sin.
  • It provides gratification if sex is unfulfilling. Many women do not experience orgasm during sexual intercourse, and some people are just unable to climax with a partner. In these cases, masturbation allows the experience of sexual fulfillment.
  • It allows us to reap the health benefits of sexual release. Medical research shows that having regular orgasms can contribute to overall health in many ways. Having an orgasm releases physical tension and emotional stress, releases endorphins, and improves circulation. Studies also show that having regular ejaculations decreases the risk of prostate cancer in men. Masturbation allows us to enjoy these benefits whether or not we have a sexual partner.
  • It enables us to enjoy our bodies and God’s gift of sexual pleasure. Most importantly, masturbation is a way for us to enjoy and celebrate our God-given sexuality. Sexual pleasure and orgasm are blessings from the Lord, and masturbation is one way we can experience them. Our bodies and our sexual organs were made to feel good; if we deny ourselves pleasure, we are refusing one of God’s gifts.
What About Onan?
Many people are under the impression that the Bible specifically forbids masturbation. In reality, the Bible does not even mention masturbation. The story of Onan (Genesis 38:7-10) is always cited as an example of how God will punish masturbators; this is where we get the term “Onanism,” which refers to masturbation. However, the story of Onan has absolutely nothing to do with masturbating. After his brother died, Onan was commanded by God to impregnate his brother’s wife. Onan had sex with her, but defied God by pulling out before he ejaculated so she wouldn’t get pregnant. His seed spilled on the ground – due to coitus interruptus, not masturbation – but this detail became equated with masturbation by those who apparently had their own agenda.
There are other passages in the Old Testament (Leviticus 15: 15-32, Leviticus 22:4, Deuteronomy 23:9-11) that refer to “emissions of semen” and what is necessary to purify one’s self after an ejaculation, or if you get semen on yourself or your clothing. There is no mention about how the emission occurs, although it would seem like masturbation could definitely be a possibility. However, it’s important to note that these passages say nothing about masturbation being sinful – simply that you must ritually cleanse yourself after ejaculating. So keep some tissues, paper towels, or wet wipes handy when you masturbate.

Thank God for the Blessing of Masturbation
God made our bodies, so if we think our bodies are dirty and shameful, we are shunning God’s divine creation. And if we masturbate with shame and feelings of sinfulness, we are besmirching God’s blessing. Instead, we should celebrate our bodies and our sexual nature, and rejoice in the pleasure and satisfaction that they can bring us through masturbation. God’s birthright to us is joy, happiness, and health, and there are few moments more joyous than the moment of orgasm. Therefore, every time we masturbate, we should say a prayer of gratitude, thanking the Lord for our bodies, for sexual pleasure, and for masturbation as a means of experiencing the bliss of orgasm. Remember also the many ways that masturbation helps keep us physically and spiritually healthy. Masturbation is truly a gift from God, and one that we should use with respect and righteousness to glorify Him.
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 11:12 AM

Gosh dear, as impressed as I am by your copypasting skills, it would be very nice to see some of your own thoughts and responses to this subject, rather than the words of a false-Christian site, dedicated to leading those seeking Christian help into sin. Next time, if you have any questions on the topic of sex, do feel free to send me a little note and we can arrange to have a pastor discuss what is appropriate over a cup of tea and a slice of my caramel and banana pie.


"She was of a great age, and had lived with a husband seven years from her virginity; And she was a widow of about fourscore and four years, which departed not from the temple, but served God with fastings and prayers night and day" - Luke 2:36-37
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 03:18 PM

The Bible FORBIDS lasciviousness!

And lest, when I come again, my God will humble me among you, and that I shall bewail many which have sinned already, and have not repented of the uncleanness and fornication and lasciviousness which they have committed. 2 Corinthians 12:21

Many sin in uncleanliness! Many sin in fornication, INCLUDING self-fornication! Many sin in LASCIVIOUSNESS!

Jesus said, GO! And sin no more! That means keep your hands off your wee-wee! And you women, keep your fingers out of your canoe!

Yes, there are many websites authored by "Christians" which promote masturbation of both sexes, use of vegetables, use of mechanical devices, mutual- and even large-group-masturbation. You will see these websites, and read their "scriptural" rationalizations.

Many offer pictures, and if you join up you can download full-length movies of so-called "Christian masturbators" in action.

These masturbatapologists are ungodly men and befoulers of Christianity.

For there are certain men crept in unawares, who were before of old ordained to this condemnation, ungodly men, turning the grace of our God into lasciviousness, and denying the only Lord God, and our Lord Jesus Christ. Jude 1:4

Yes, be not deceived. They are WOLVES! These men come amongst the Christian flock as ravening wolves amongst sheep. Their lust is DAMNATION! Their home is HELL!

Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Matthew 7:15

For I know this, that after my departing shall grievous wolves enter in among you, not sparing the flock. Acts 20:29

So praise the Lord, walk in the spirit of Jesus, keep your hands away from your igneous zones, eat plenty of cabbage, and change your underwear at least once a month. I do, and when I sit down in the public library to read Rushdoony or Chilton people always move respectfully away.

~~ OEJ
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 04:24 PM

But surely masturbation isn't piffleing yourself.. lol, so it isn't really fornication.

And why does masturbation INHERENTLY, as you propose, be lascivious?

I'm not saying i've ever done that, but, just askin'.
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 05:05 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unfalsifiable View Post
But surely masturbation isn't piffleing yourself.. lol, so it isn't really fornication.

And why does masturbation INHERENTLY, as you propose, be lascivious?

I'm not saying i've ever done that, but, just askin'.
Masturbation is sinful because you are having sex with person of the same gender; yourself. Theretofore Masturbation makes you a homer.

Additionally there is the crime of seed murder. The soul enters the body in the seed so every time you masturbate you murder countless thousands of souls.



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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 07:01 PM

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Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
Masturbation is sinful because you are having sex with person of the same gender; yourself. Theretofore Masturbation makes you a homer.

Additionally there is the crime of seed murder. The soul enters the body in the seed so every time you masturbate you murder countless thousands of souls.
Ok, seed murder aside, which is another interesting topic, masturbation definitively isn't having sex with yourself. I.e. it is not intercourse.

If however it was, what about scratching your back? Does that make you a homosexual? Licking your lips? Homosexual? They are all acts you do with yourself, all which, when done unto another are, well frankly sexual. Give me more time I could think of more.

Masturbation does seem different, probably because masturbation often involves the male or the female... thinking sinful thoughts. But what if it didn't? That would surely make it ok? Just like scratching your back or licking your lips, why shouldn't masturbation be seen as inherently neutral, until misused?
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 08:44 PM

what can i do,i just love the feeling of masturbation
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 09:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unfalsifiable View Post
Ok, seed murder aside, which is another interesting topic, masturbation definitively isn't having sex with yourself. I.e. it is not intercourse.

If however it was, what about scratching your back? Does that make you a homosexual? Licking your lips? Homosexual? They are all acts you do with yourself, all which, when done unto another are, well frankly sexual. Give me more time I could think of more.

Masturbation does seem different, probably because masturbation often involves the male or the female... thinking sinful thoughts. But what if it didn't? That would surely make it ok? Just like scratching your back or licking your lips, why shouldn't masturbation be seen as inherently neutral, until misused?
Friend,

Licking your lips and scratching your back while gateway activities to depravity are not sex. Sex involves the release of seed. If you are masturbating the only person who is stimulating you you is yourself. That seems pretty cut and dry so the it case closed as far as masturbation being gay sex.



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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 10:11 PM

THis thread is making me want to go kill some souls right now....
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lord warrior is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.lord warrior is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.lord warrior is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.lord warrior is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.lord warrior is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.lord warrior is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.lord warrior is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.lord warrior is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.lord warrior is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.lord warrior is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.lord warrior is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 10:48 PM

To see these people who just LOVE to sinful and depraved.I too once had the problem of chronic masturbation. The devil would just send me thoughts of all the little girls that would run around in there undies and bikini's. How much would you like to touch and play with there little budding parts. It was more than I could stand sometimes. But when I had done the sinful deed, I knew it was a sinful deed. But then God answered my prayers by giving me my Amy, my over sexual 13 year old bride.Now I can partake of such thoughts the way Jesus had envisioned. As a sexual act in the blessed bonds of holy matrimony. Thats what these people need. A realization of this unholy act, and a prayer that God will give them a way to deal with there lust.

And since they will NOT declare there sin or love for Jesus, let them burn in all ways, now and in the afterlife.
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 11:15 PM

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Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
Friend,

Licking your lips and scratching your back while gateway activities to depravity are not sex. Sex involves the release of seed. If you are masturbating the only person who is stimulating you you is yourself. That seems pretty cut and dry so the it case closed as far as masturbation being gay sex.
Well firstly, masturbation is not sex. Sex is intercourse, it involves more then one person, always.

BUT, if sex is releasing seed, for a man, I would ask you is it therefore ok for women to masturbate? They release no seed. In theory, barring them from impure thoughts, they could do it.
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 11:24 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unfalsifiable View Post
Well firstly, masturbation is not sex. Sex is intercourse, it involves more then one person, always.

BUT, if sex is releasing seed, for a man, I would ask you is it therefore ok for women to masturbate? They release no seed. In theory, barring them from impure thoughts, they could do it.
We already have a thread dedicated to that topic.

I will warn you in advance that it is not provided for your tennaged tittilation.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 11:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unfalsifiable View Post
Well firstly, masturbation is not sex. Sex is intercourse, it involves more then one person, always.
Oh yes, here we go with the Darwinist spin on this. I suppose when Sister Talitha grabbed the fly of my pants when she was trying to clean up the tea she spilt on me that was “sex” according to you secularist? No, I go by the Christian definition of sex and that means seed release.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unfalsifiable View Post
BUT, if sex is releasing seed, for a man, I would ask you is it therefore ok for women to masturbate? They release no seed. In theory, barring them from impure thoughts, they could do it.
It’s the same thing; God goes by intentions as well as deeds. Remember Abraham’s wife Sarah was cursed with bareness because Abraham claimed Sarah was his sister to keep her from getting raped by Pharaoh. God has no time for incest so He cursed Sarah for sleeping with her fake brother. The same applies to female masturbation; because woman masturbator is thinking of having sex with a man during this disgusting lesbian act her intention is to waste seed and murder the un-conceived for her own selfish pleasure. Therefore female masturbation is the same as male masturbation.

I think we both agree friend that murdering people for your' pleasure is evil. That is what masturbation is.



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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 11:41 PM

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Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
because woman masturbator is thinking of having sex with a man during this disgusting lesbian act her intention is to waste seed and murder the un-conceived for her own selfish pleasure.
My hypothesis was that if the man or woman was not thinking sinful thoughts while masturbating. I am proposing that masturbation is not INHERENTLY evil, just like back scratching or lip licking. Please reconsider your post.
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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 11:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unfalsifiable View Post
My hypothesis was that if the man or woman was not thinking sinful thoughts while masturbating. I am proposing that masturbation is not INHERENTLY evil, just like back scratching or lip licking. Please reconsider your post.
How is murder not inherently evil?



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Default Re: Please Pray for Chronic Masturbators - 01-21-2008, 11:52 PM

A woman murders no seed in masturbation.
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