[Brother Gonzalez]

We all know PETA, the devil-fueled anti-God organization, promoter of bestiality and all kind of mosntruosities against God, the family and the country.

It came into my knowledge that they are planning a plot against another of the values of the Western Civilization, the American Language.


PETA says phrases like 'bring home the bacon' are comparable to racism and homophobia. Yes, I am not making a joke. They are saying that.



They want to change the phrases for new, non-animal harming, phrases.


Why should we be ashamed of bringing home the bacon? Of course, the same promoters of this are promoters of lesbians at work, and other women too. Diminishing the men, so the devil has a paved way to conquer America.


You can read it in the fake news site known as CNN:


https://edition.cnn.com/2018/12/05/e...ntl/index.html

"Bring home the bacon" becomes "bring home the bagels"
"Killing two birds with one stone" becomes "feeding two birds with one scone"
"Flog a dead horse" becomes "feed a fed horse"
"Hold your horses" becomes "hold the phone"
"Let the cat out of the bag" becomes "spill the beans"
"All your eggs in one basket" becomes "all your berries in one bowl"
"Open a can of worms" becomes "open Pandora’s box"
"Be the guinea pig" becomes "be the test tube"
"Taking the bull by the horns" becomes "taking the flower by the thorns"
"More than one way to skin a cat" becomes "more than one way to peel a potato"

Is there something gayer than saying "I am the one bringing home the bagels" Really?


Well, let's see what God has said about this topics:


Genesis 1:26-28
26 And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.


27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.


28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.



Men has dominion over animals. Full stop. No need to butcher our language to stop something God does not want to stop.


And don't get me started about the so-called "homophobia"... There are many threads about this in this forum, please refer to them. Homophobia is "fake news", it should be called "Trying to bring the love of God to pansies".


I will be praying for your language. American men: stand proud and repeat "I bring home the bacon!" "I bring home the bacon!"

[BrotherLarry]

Brother Gonz'


Being the manly man I am, I have been and always will bring home the bacon and lots of other tasty meat to satisfy my cravings. I love beef in particular and try to enjoy it as often as possible.


But say, how's that wall coming? You ARE continuing to build it, right? I know sometimes you people get lazy and are easily led off track - so I just wanted to remind you of your reason for being allowed here, and that's your willingness to do what our President asks of you.


In Christian Brotherhood,
Larry

[BibleReader2231]

PETA should stand for Pedophiles Enjoying Touching Animals. That’s what my Pa says at least. I enjoy bacon probably at least five times a week and I’m sorry, but savory bacon will always be better than your diarrhea inducing romaine! The news has proven this recently as well. You know who else besides PETA hates bacon? Towel headed moose lamb terrorists!!!!!!

[Basilissa]

I wonder if whoever sent that PETA tweet has his calendar stuck on April 1?

But, I'm gonna put my tinfoil hat on and pretend to be a special snowflake myself. Here is the special snowflake analysis of PETA alternatives:

"Bring home the bacon" becomes "bring home the bagels"

No way. This singles out people who believe in gluten free fad, and is thus offensive to them. (Please do not tell me that there are gluten free bagels, because that would be an even worse abomination than "I can't believe it's not butter - you better believe because of its hideous taste" scam).

"Killing two birds with one stone" becomes "feeding two birds with one scone"

This is very insensitive to people suffering from ornithophobia.

"Flog a dead horse" becomes "feed a fed horse"

And make the horse sick and die? Animal cruelty!

"Hold your horses" becomes "hold the phone"

Offensive to people who live in a third world shithole country and cannot afford a phone. You really had to rub their poverty in, hadn't you?

"Let the cat out of the bag" becomes "spill the beans"

Offensive for the same group of people. They cannot afford spilling any food!

"All your eggs in one basket" becomes "all your berries in one bowl"

OK, I have nothing for this one. Help?

"Open a can of worms" becomes "open Pandora’s box"

Is that some sort of advertisement for the ugly cheap bracelets? That's so capitalist!

"Be the guinea pig" becomes "be the test tube"

This is wrong on so many levels, I don't even know where to begin. Homoerotic subtext, for one.

"Taking the bull by the horns" becomes "taking the flower by the thorns"

This is so racist, assuming that all flowers have thorns. Has the author of this saying ever been to a garden?!?

"More than one way to skin a cat" becomes "more than one way to peel a potato

The only nutrition in a potato is in the skin, idiots! Only ignorant people peel potatoes.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Bring home the bagels? What is this, some kind of Jewish advertisement for bagel shops and delis? Is George Soros behind this? I protest!

[BibleReader2231]

Miss Basilissa I have to say you made me laugh out loud when I read your post. All of your sayings are indeed things libtards would say in response to this! 😂

[Basilissa]

Originally Posted by BibleReader2231

Miss Basilissa I have to say you made me laugh out loud when I read your post. All of your sayings are indeed things libtards would say in response to this! 😂

Wait! It gets even better! Just take a look at PETA (you know, the organization that will steal your pets only to euthanize 96% of them within 24 hours) Twitter feed related to this issue. Most of the comments are hilarious!!

This is my favorite one:

jo🐸☕‏ @jodzilla_34
Replying to @peta
You're really beating a dead horse with idiotic posts like this. You guys are pig headed, and your twitter account is going to the dogs. If you want to have a good twitter take the bull by the horns and try actually working, instead of tweeting bs like this. Be the Guinea pig.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Originally Posted by Basilissa

"All your eggs in one basket" becomes "all your berries in one bowl" OK, I have nothing for this one. Help?

It makes no sense. If you put all your eggs in one basket then some may break, just from bumping together or if you drop the basket. But berries are unbreakable and if you drop the bowl, you can just pick them up. I suppose you might break the bowl, depending on where you dropped it? But you'd still break it if you had them in two bowls.

As for Pandora's box, if you open a can of worms then okay, you get worms, but you can put those in the garden. If they're dead (and I suspect they might be after the canning process) then you can feed them to the birds - much better for them than scones! But if you open Pandora's box (which wasn't even a box, but some sort of urn) then you get all sorts of evil. This one is overkill.

Feeding a fed horse is just animal cruelty and leads to equine obesity and tooth decay. Brother Larry would have something to say about that, for sure!

PETA: pillocks for the extraordinary twisting of aphorisms.

[BibleReader2231]

I’m on my school bus on my way home and I just laughed so hard I had to show the friend across the aisle. She raised eyebrows at this forum but laughed so hard at your post she tooted. I had to scold her afterward that God heard that though.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Originally Posted by BibleReader2231

I’m on my school bus on my way home and I just laughed so hard I had to show the friend across the aisle. She raised eyebrows at this forum but laughed so hard at your post she tooted. I had to scold her afterward that God heard that though.

Not to worry, dear. God likes a good fart!

[Basilissa]

Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey

It makes no sense. If you put all your eggs in one basket then some may break, just from bumping together or if you drop the basket. But berries are unbreakable and if you drop the bowl, you can just pick them up. I suppose you might break the bowl, depending on where you dropped it? But you'd still break it if you had them in two bowls.

Good point, Sister!

As for Pandora's box, if you open a can of worms then okay, you get worms, but you can put those in the garden. If they're dead (and I suspect they might be after the canning process) then you can feed them to the birds - much better for them than scones!

Agreed! And robins, blue jays, and wood peckers will certainly appreciate that gift!

But if you open Pandora's box (which wasn't even a box, but some sort of urn) then you get all sorts of evil. This one is overkill.

True again. This substitution just goes to the dogs.

Feeding a fed horse is just animal cruelty and leads to equine obesity and tooth decay. Brother Larry would have something to say about that, for sure!

Let's wait until we hear it from the horse's mouth!