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Default Crime Scene Investigation – Old-Testament Style - 02-03-2014, 01:55 PM

It is a well-known fact that Christians value the sanctity of human life (Gen 9:5-6). The Bible even goes so far as to tell us not to kill (Ex 20:13). So if a person is found murdered, the matter is to be taken very seriously. But should we turn to forensic science, DNA testing and detective work to solve a murder? The Bible says no.

Deut 21:1-9
1 If one be found slain in the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee to possess it, lying in the field, and it be not known who hath slain him:
2 Then thy elders and thy judges shall come forth, and they shall measure unto the cities which are round about him that is slain:
3 And it shall be, that the city which is next unto the slain man, even the elders of that city shall take an heifer, which hath not been wrought with, and which hath not drawn in the yoke;
4 And the elders of that city shall bring down the heifer unto a rough valley, which is neither eared nor sown, and shall strike off the heifer's neck there in the valley:
5 And the priests the sons of Levi shall come near; for them the Lord thy God hath chosen to minister unto him, and to bless in the name of the Lord; and by their word shall every controversy and every stroke be tried:
6 And all the elders of that city, that are next tunto the slain man, shall wash their hands over the heifer that is beheaded inhe valley:
7 And they shall answer and say, Our hands have not shed this blood, neither have our eyes seen it.
8 Be merciful, O Lord, unto thy people Israel, whom thou hast redeemed, and lay not innocent blood unto thy people of Israel's charge. And the blood shall be forgiven them.
9 So shalt thou put away the guilt of innocent blood from among you, when thou shalt do that which is right in the sight of the Lord.


If a body is found and the killer is unknown, the following step must be taken:
  1. Find the nearest city.
The elders of the city must take the following steps to exonerate themselves:
  1. Kill a cow;
  2. Wash their hands;
  3. Say they didn't do it;
  4. God will forgive them (even though they didn't do it);
  5. Case closed.
Think of how much taxpayer's money the government would save if it axed all homicide squads and forensic labs and instead implemented Biblical law. I believe we would see the murder rate plummet. But could you imagine the stink Hollywood would kick up? They would have to cancel nearly all crime shows. Every week it would be body found, cow killed, case closed. Who would want to watch that?


Mt 21:42, 44 Jesus saith unto them, Did ye never read in the scriptures, The stone which the builders rejected, the same is become the head of the corner: this is the Lord's doing, and it is marvellous in our eyes . . . ? And whosoever shall fall on this stone shall be broken: but on whomsoever it shall fall, it will grind him to powder.

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Default Re: Crime Scene Investigation – Old-Testament Style - 01-28-2018, 11:21 PM

This thread is even more relevant today than when it was first written.

There's so much talking about the whole Russia thing (and we know from the President's mouth that there was no collusion). We're spending taxpayers' money on the Mueller investigation, while instead we should simply follow the Biblical procedure outlined by Brother Pendergrast.
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Default Re: Crime Scene Investigation – Old-Testament Style - 01-29-2018, 12:22 AM

I'm a little confused about this part of The Lord's instructions in these matters.



". . .an heifer, which hath not been wrought with, and which hath not drawn in the yoke;. . ."


Does this mean that the cow has to be a virgin? And how does one confirm this status? Do cows have the same "tell" in these instances as human females? Should BrotherLarry expand his practice to Bovine Virtue Assurance Investigation?


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

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Default Re: Crime Scene Investigation – Old-Testament Style - 01-30-2018, 08:49 AM

Is it just me or does it really work out that the more people think they know better than God the more lawlessness preens itself abroad?
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Default Re: Crime Scene Investigation – Old-Testament Style - 01-30-2018, 09:16 AM

I don't know about you guys but I always preferred Law and Order to CSI. Those CSI guys seem to be all about how they look. I think the Law & Order guys are less faggy.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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