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Default To Mayor Hold: Legal Notice - 09-21-2016, 10:32 PM

From the offices of Michael Hezekiah, Atty at Law


While I have not yet consulted with Larry Pureheart, my client, I would like to propose a less expensive solution than the faux exorcism you speak of.


I've found for $300, I can have a woman who calls herself Lady Kerawynn do a ritual of "Banishing and Casting." In this ritual, Kerawynn banishes the unwanted entities from the property and casts them to land where they may. If the good people of your town have any sense at all, they won't worry about where the spirits land.


She then forms her arms into a cross and says:


BEFORE ME STANDS RAPHAEL
BEHIND ME GABRIEL
AT MY RIGHT HAND MICHAEL
AT MY LEFT HAND URIEL
BEFORE ME FLAMES THE PENTAGRAM
AND ABOVE ME
SHINES THE SIX-RAYED
STAR.


She does this while standing in front of a flaming pentagram, which is basically a star-like thing with candles at each point. This is an ancient symbol often used along with an ankh for fertility and other rituals. I'm sure it would rid the place of your ridiculous spirits.


Or how about a better idea? Realize it is 2016 and there is no need for any of this.


I'll wait to hear from you before sending the $300 to your private account.


Mike
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