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Question Who needs the word of Jesus most? - 05-08-2008, 08:56 PM

In our efforts to being the word of Christ to the world we are spreading ourselves thin.

Thoughts of who we think worthy targets are at the moment ??

My thoughts today were Heroes fans and Trv Cvlt Borg-wegian Black Metallers.

Heroes is the biggest sci-fi series since X-Files, and I was watching a trailer a few months ago that showed reactions to Heroes all around the world. There were auditoriums filled with screaming fans, and the cultish hype surrounding it is almost as bad as Beatle-mania.

Black Metallers speak for themselves, tho I'd love to hook some of those Kvlt freaks, and bring them to Christ. We certainly haven't converted enough Black Metallers.
Suggestions please....

Last edited by Jeb Stuart Thurmond; 04-09-2010 at 02:40 AM.
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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-08-2008, 09:13 PM

I was thinking India would be a good target. There are lots of them, and they use computers, and they write in English. Plus, being in that time zone they could help fill up a couple of dead hours online when other people are asleep or at work. Plus, they're at their computers 24/7, so there would be no down time.

I propose a Landover Mission to India for the fall. They're pretty tough about foreigners touching their women, just like us. I can't wait to do lots of hands-on ministering.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-08-2008, 09:19 PM

Homers, Liberals, Blacks, Jews, Catholics.

Isn't that enough?

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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-08-2008, 09:24 PM

India needs salvation the most: there's Suttee - burning widows; sacred cows - holy beef-burgers; Thuggee, robbery and murder; slave labor; child labor; corruption at all levels; the caste system; temples to rats/snakes/general awfulness; gods with elephants heads and/or many arms, eunuchs; sanyasin; Mahatma Gandhi; Mother Theresa; Their two main cities have weird names: Bombay - Mumbai...





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Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-08-2008, 09:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King View Post
I was thinking India would be a good target.
Just make sure you can tell the difference between Sikhs and Muslims:


Sikh


Muslim


Upon request I will cite scripture for all these facts in God's Holy Word.

✝ This is a Christian community and we worship GOD of the Holy bible, the only Living GOD. We worship Jesus Christ, Son of GOD and Savior. Anything else is absurd. ✝
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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-08-2008, 10:59 PM

Landover Missionaries should send a special batch of 100,000 bears named Muhammad to the towel-heads.

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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-08-2008, 11:33 PM

Did someone says bears?


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-08-2008, 11:56 PM

And as always - Jimmy Carter.


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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-09-2008, 07:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JennyD View Post
What's a target that would hit Christians?

Black metal fans? Probably not likely.
Black Metallers are seriously hellbound, they all hate Christians and are racist hateful church-burning nazi nutbags.

I'd also love to get some REAL Satanists on here, as I hate them more than Catholics. What kind of freaks turn their back on Christianity, only to join ANOTHER religion. They advocate terrorist church arson and assaults on Christians, and worship God's real arch nemesis! Seriously, I have debated with loads of these people in the past, and what I took from it is theyre scarier and more wacked that even the Pope.

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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-09-2008, 11:32 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by revrggreen View Post
Black Metallers are seriously easy targets, and they all hate Christians and are racist hateful church-burning nazi nutbags. I sometimes still troll them when Im bored on the soulseek music rooms.
Several years ago, this guy joined our forum. He was all "CHRISTIAN BLUD WILL FLOW AND YOU WILL SEE THAT YOUR GOD IS WEAK!!! BLACK METAL IST KRIEG!" Basically, he was still upset about Scandinavia being conquered by Christians a thousand years ago.

He didn't have any answers when asked if his Norse gods were so tough, why did his people get conquered by the Christians, so he resorted to threats to kill all of us. It was hilarious.

He quit posting here when he got put in prison for beating the crap out of some dude and forcing him to drink his own blood.

He's out of prison now, and someone here (I can't remember who) invited him back to church, but he never responded.


Upon request I will cite scripture for all these facts in God's Holy Word.

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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-09-2008, 05:09 PM

Steven King(recent soldiering is what happens when you can't read statement) Plus he writes graphic novels about Satanism and clearly the space between his nose and upper lip is to wide.

Dopers.

People playing God instead of allowing Jesus to do His job.


God bless America, the Second Amendment and the Constitution. God bless the United States Marine Corps and all who fight for Jesus in third world cess pools. God bless the GOP and all they stand for, Truth, Honesty and the American people. God bless Landover Baptist Church and all True Christians™ the world over. Curses to our Muslim President, his failure is our Salvation.
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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-09-2008, 08:31 PM

Obama supporters. Because he's black is a reason to vote against him, not FOR him.
Hillary Supporters. Because the Clintons are concentrated evil.
McCain non supporters. He's a POW, you got a problem with that?


God bless America, the Second Amendment and the Constitution. God bless the United States Marine Corps and all who fight for Jesus in third world cess pools. God bless the GOP and all they stand for, Truth, Honesty and the American people. God bless Landover Baptist Church and all True Christians™ the world over. Curses to our Muslim President, his failure is our Salvation.
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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-12-2008, 08:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post
I thought it was the real guy.

I just looked, but I can't find his thread in the old-old forum any more, and he doesn't show up in the members list there any more.
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Gorgoroth SOOOO ROCKS!!!!.

"THOUSAND YEARS AGO MESSENGER OF HVITEKRIST (THE MAN YOU CALL JEZUS) TO OUR MOTHER NORTH (NORWAY, SWEDEN, ICELAND, DENMARK) AND >FORCED< CHRIZTIANITY UPON US!!! WE HAVE ALLMOST LOST OUR RELIGION (ÁSATRÚ/NORSE MITHOLIGY) AND BLOOD SHALL BE SHED. BLOOD FOR BLOOD!!! YOU CHRISTIANS ARE MOST OF THE VICIUS CREATURES ON THIS PLANET! THIS WEBSITE MAKES ME SICK! YOU CALL EVERYTHING SATANIC AND DIABOLIC THAT ISNT. YOU HAVE SOMETHING AGAINST EVERYBODY WHO ARENT LIKE YOU! YOU SHALL PAY FOR THAT!!! CHURCES SHALL BURN, CHRISTIAN BLOOD SHALL FLOW AND YOU WILL FEEL THAT YOUR GOD IS WEAK!!!


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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-12-2008, 10:00 PM

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Originally Posted by Prune Danish View Post
Ah! I was searching for "Ghaal" and "Gorogoth".


Upon request I will cite scripture for all these facts in God's Holy Word.

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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-13-2008, 02:40 AM

King Diamond sings so high because his pants must be so tight. (Or hopefully he's an eunuch).

KrokuS is even more satanic. And Ball Room Blitz, it's gay, too?


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-13-2008, 03:14 AM

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Originally Posted by Nobar King View Post
Another good dig is claiming that KrokuS is more than they are. They can be satanic, too, right? And Ball Room Blitz, it's gay, too?
I thought it was a song about spraying his crotch for crabs.


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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-30-2008, 02:55 AM

I think we are primed and ready for a big time hatred of SUV owners and "gas wasters". I wouldn't be surprised to see lots of anti SUV and gas guzzler legislation, propaganda, and fuzzy infomercials, similar to all that anti-smoking garbage. Remember, you heard it from me first.

From the article linked above: (regarding persecuted Hummer owners)

"Not a day went by that I didn't get the finger,"

"I had people spit on it. I had people in Subarus yelling horrible things at me."

vandals ruined a brand new H2 belonging to a 32-year-old marketer in Washington - smashing the windows, slashing the tires, and scratching "for the enviro" into the paint, according to the Washington Post.

"A hippie guy and girl were crossing the street in front of my vehicle when the guy pulled down his pants and mooned me in the middle of the street,"

"I look at this guy and he starts yelling 'small penis, small penis, small penis' over and over,"


Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.

Last edited by Jeb Stuart Thurmond; 04-09-2010 at 02:52 AM.
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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 05-30-2008, 03:33 AM

So, maybe Landover should be buying up the entire fleet for pennies on the dollar?


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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 06-02-2008, 06:01 AM

Do rainbows make you think of gay sex?


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Default Re: WHOM DO WE HATE NOW? - 06-02-2008, 01:28 PM

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Originally Posted by Nobar King View Post
Don't forget that they're also God's way of promising that He won't drown everything in the entire world ever again. So rainbows are like unicorns: a mighty symbol of God's rock-hard, throbbing might, that've just been hijacked by vicious sodomites.

Genesis 9:12 And God said, This is the token of the covenant which I make between me and you and every living creature that is with you, for perpetual generations:
13 I do set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a token of a covenant between me and the earth.
14 And it shall come to pass, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the bow shall be seen in the cloud:
15 And I will remember my covenant, which is between me and you and every living creature of all flesh; and the waters shall no more become a flood to destroy all flesh.
16 And the bow shall be in the cloud; and I will look upon it, that I may remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that is upon the earth.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

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