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Default I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 01:07 AM

I say this, because I can't make heads or tails of this image I just happened to stumble across:





What are these Nancy boys trying to say? How could God give them back somebody that is not in God's possession?

Shouldn't this entreaty have been addressed to the Devil?

Yes, that would constitute praying to the Devil, but isn't that what the homers are doing anyway?

Ah, never mind. Just more proof that unsaved sodomists don't know how to pray, and will only annoy God if they do it without first receiving some instruction from a Landover pastor.


Quote:
Proverbs 28:9

He that turneth away his ear from hearing the law, even his prayer shall be abomination.


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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 01:13 AM

What id that thing, and what's it about to do to that microphone?
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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 01:16 AM

Being A True Christian™, it is completely normal for a mans man such as myself to be completely out of touch with the Homers. The only time I have ever touched one was purely accidental or in an effort to show them Jesus. So I am not surprised when others feel the same.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 01:18 AM

I have to admit, I'm totally out of touch with popular queer culture. And, I'd like to keep it that way.


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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 01:23 AM

Whatever that thing is, I get the idea from the image that it's dead.

Probably died of the AIDS or rectal trauma, the two leading causes of death for fairies.
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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 01:25 AM

That's why I always hold my mic in my hand. When I give my sermons, I can't stand those mic stands.

I want to feel that hard steel in my hands, praise Jesus. I want to be the one in charge of it's placement near my mouth, praise Jesus. I want to use it and abuse it for the Lord, praise Jesus. I want to PLEASE JESUS, praise Jesus. I want to PLEASE AHIM WITH MY MOUTH, praise Jesus. I want Jesus to KNOW That He's been preached on by Pastor Ezekiel Flint, praise Jesus. OH LORD CAN I GET AN AMEN out of you today? Shout GLORY as I use my mouth in the service of the Lord! Hallelloooooooya! Oh JESUS let me USE MY MOUTH in THY SERVICE, praise Jesus!


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 01:32 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
That's why I always hold my mic in my hand. When I give my sermons, I can't stand those mic stands.

I want to feel that hard steel in my hands, praise Jesus. I want to be the one in charge of it's placement near my mouth, praise Jesus. I want to use it and abuse it for the Lord, praise Jesus. I want to PLEASE JESUS, praise Jesus. I want to PLEASE AHIM WITH MY MOUTH, praise Jesus. I want Jesus to KNOW That He's been preached on by Pastor Ezekiel Flint, praise Jesus. OH LORD CAN I GET AN AMEN out of you today? Shout GLORY as I use my mouth in the service of the Lord! Hallelloooooooya! Oh JESUS let me USE MY MOUTH in THY SERVICE, praise Jesus!
PRAISE JESUS!!

Oh pastor, your words are as moving in print as they are when attending one of your legendary sermons! Tears are streaming down my face! AMEN!! AMEN!!!
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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 01:49 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
That's why I always hold my mic in my hand. When I give my sermons, I can't stand those mic stands.

I want to feel that hard steel in my hands, praise Jesus. I want to be the one in charge of it's placement near my mouth, praise Jesus. I want to use it and abuse it for the Lord, praise Jesus. I want to PLEASE JESUS, praise Jesus. I want to PLEASE AHIM WITH MY MOUTH, praise Jesus. I want Jesus to KNOW That He's been preached on by Pastor Ezekiel Flint, praise Jesus. OH LORD CAN I GET AN AMEN out of you today? Shout GLORY as I use my mouth in the service of the Lord! Hallelloooooooya! Oh JESUS let me USE MY MOUTH in THY SERVICE, praise Jesus!
Amen, AMEN, AMEN, AMEN!


Oh dear, I've lost control of my bladder!


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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 01:59 AM

I spend a great deal of time on the weekends undercover, observing homers in gay bars dancing to queer music and making out. I observe their gait. I listen to their speech. I take note of their mannerisms, their signals, their secret hand shakes...

This is my job as the spearhead of A.S.S. It's a dirty job, but not as dirty as the jobs the homers are giving and receiving in the bathrooms. It's a thankless job, but sometimes I do get compliments on my leather chaps.


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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 02:13 AM

God bless you, Bily Bob! If you're ever unlucky enough to find yourself in the San Francisco Bay Area, drop me a line and we'll go and monitor gay activities together.


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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 04:38 AM

What's a Justin Bieber? Is that a new version of Leave it to Beaver? That's when society started to fall apart.


Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 05:35 AM

Justine Bieber is some fourteen year old girl who sings hop songs containing subliminal Satanic messages.


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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 06:50 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield View Post
What's a Justin Bieber? Is that a new version of Leave it to Beaver? That's when society started to fall apart.
This will tell you all you need to know about the effeminate false Christian singer.



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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-27-2011, 03:01 PM

How can Jesus give them back Freddy Mercury? that fag is currently serving life in eternal damnation where he belongs.

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Default Re: I must be very out of touch with popular queer culture... - 08-28-2011, 03:06 PM

Oh my...You know what they say about baby teeth? If the child sucks his/her fingers all the time, the teeth will grow outwards. If sucking continues when the secondary teeth began to grow, they bend too.

Considering this and the homerism of the person in the picture, I find the picture VERY disgusting.

YiC, M


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