[Rachael Van Helsing]

It wasn't me! I remember telling someone in some thread something about watching teletubbies, and BT mentioned that he thought I was more a 'Boohbah' person as something in there reminded him of me.
Thus, I felt compelled to look it up and I hope he didn't mean what I think he did.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

BT mentioned that he thought I was more a 'Boohbah' person as something in there reminded him of me.

Oh, well now we have the conversation in context, it makes perfect sense. Yes, Brother Temperance is quite perceptive, wouldn't you agree?

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle

Oh, well now we have the conversation in context, it makes perfect sense. Yes, Brother Temperance is quite perceptive, wouldn't you agree?

Dammit, I walked right into that one.

One must question why good Brother Temperance was watching Boohbah to begin with? Godly research, was it?

[SalvationSeeker]

Originally Posted by Fish

No, my wife is not a Christian. And you are right, if the abuser truly repents and my wife chooses to ignore God then the abuser will go to Heaven while my wife will live a seperate eternity in hell. This is a fact of life.

Your harlot of a wife should be ashamed of herself, having seduced some poor man into "raping" her.
Disgusting!

Next time, try keeping your property under control, you filthy cathylick!
Oh, and enjoy your banning, your place in hell has been secured.
PRAISE JESUS!

Remember us as you burn eternally!

[Fish (On Moderation)]

Originally Posted by SalvationSeeker

Your harlot of a wife should be ashamed of herself, having seduced some poor man into "raping" her.

That's low. Even for you.

[Brother Temperance]

Originally Posted by Fish

That's low. Even for you.

You're back! Have you decided to repent, or will Jesus have to toss you and your 8-year-old wife into hellfire together with every Muslim who's ever lived?

[Fish (On Moderation)]

Originally Posted by Brother Temperance

You're back! Have you decided to repent, or will Jesus have to toss you and your 8-year-old wife into hellfire together with every Muslim who's ever lived?

My wife isn't 8.

And I repent every day. Maybe you should do the same. Jesus will forgive you, no matter how far you think you are from him.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Originally Posted by Fish

My wife isn't 8.

When will she turn 8?

And I repent every day.

You have a lot of things of which to repent. Now, for True Christians™, it's a little different:

1 John 3:6 Whosoever abideth in him sinneth not: whosoever sinneth hath not seen him, neither known him.

1 John 5:18 We know that whosoever is born of God sinneth not; but he that is begotten of God keepeth himself, and that wicked one toucheth him not.

[Fish (On Moderation)]

Originally Posted by More Saved Than Thou

When will she turn 8?

She won't. She's in her mid 20's.

Originally Posted by More Saved Than Thou

You have a lot of things of which to repent. Now, for True Christians™, it's a little different:

1 John 3:6 Whosoever abideth in him sinneth not: whosoever sinneth hath not seen him, neither known him.

1 John 5:18 We know that whosoever is born of God sinneth not; but he that is begotten of God keepeth himself, and that wicked one toucheth him not.

So, are you saying that Christians never ever sin?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by Fish

So, are you saying that Christians never ever sin?

Well, I see that the degenerate mary-worshiper is back.

What the good Brother was referring to above was the fact that we True Christians™ are Saved by the Blood of Jesus and are thus guaranteed a place in Heaven.

You cultists on the other hand are a steaming pile of unsaved scum, so I don't blame you for trying to weasel your way out of the trouble you're in with God. But there is only one way, and that is through the Blood of Jesus.

[Fish (On Moderation)]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

What the good Brother was referring to above was the fact that we True Christians™ are Saved by the Blood of Jesus and are thus guaranteed a place in Heaven.

You cultists on the other hand are a steaming pile of unsaved scum, so I don't blame you for trying to weasel your way out of the trouble you're in with God. But there is only one way, and that is through the Blood of Jesus.

So, only True Christians™ are saved, and to become one you need to tithe heavily to Landover.

I always thought that was a funny dig at fundies.

So, has anyone EVER donated to Landover via the paypal button? Even once?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Originally Posted by Fish

So, only True Christians™ are saved, and to become one you need to tithe heavily to Landover.

I always thought that was a funny dig at fundies.

So, has anyone EVER donated to Landover via the paypal button? Even once?

Yes. The bandwidth isn't free, and since we were attacked several times, we had to switch to a dedicated server which isn't free either. So people who waste our bandwidth are tolerated for awhile, but eventually we get tired of carrying them.

[Fish (On Moderation)]

Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle

Yes. The bandwidth isn't free, and since we were attacked several times, we had to switch to a dedicated server which isn't free either. So people who waste our bandwidth are tolerated for awhile, but eventually we get tired of carrying them.

So if I donated $5 would I be exempt from banning and could I post all I like?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Absolutely not. Even those who donate hundreds or even thousands of dollars (Glendora, Marshall, Prune Danish among others) have no recourse from the GODLY GONG.

[Mrs. Rogers]

Originally Posted by Fish

So if I donated $5 would I be exempt from banning and could I post all I like?

Well, wonders will never cease - I never expected to see True Christian™ wisdom hidden within any sentence of yours. The posting "all I like" being the lifetime of terrible sins committed by your wife's abuser, the $5 being his deathbed conversion; the exemption from banning being his narrow escape from the bowels of hell. His place within the Heavenly Choir guaranteed for all eternity ... who knows, he might even be placed next to you, should you repent of your catholicism; his presence a reminder of your Earthly married life, should your wife continue to ignore God.

God's Ways are mysterious indeed.

[Fish (On Moderation)]

Originally Posted by Mrs. Rogers

Well, wonders will never cease - I never expected to see True Christian™ wisdom hidden within any sentence of yours. The posting "all I like" being the lifetime of terrible sins committed by your wife's abuser, the $5 being his deathbed conversion; the exemption from banning being his narrow escape from the bowels of hell. His place within the Heavenly Choir guaranteed for all eternity ... who knows, he might even be placed next to you, should you repent of your catholicism; his presence a reminder of your Earthly married life, should your wife continue to ignore God.

God's Ways are mysterious indeed.

If you have a problem with salvation then that is your business. Jesus himself warned us of these such things.

Matthew 20:1-16 (King James Version)

1For the kingdom of heaven is like unto a man that is an householder, which went out early in the morning to hire labourers into his vineyard. 2And when he had agreed with the labourers for a penny a day, he sent them into his vineyard.
3And he went out about the third hour, and saw others standing idle in the marketplace,
4And said unto them; Go ye also into the vineyard, and whatsoever is right I will give you. And they went their way.
5Again he went out about the sixth and ninth hour, and did likewise.
6And about the eleventh hour he went out, and found others standing idle, and saith unto them, Why stand ye here all the day idle?
7They say unto him, Because no man hath hired us. He saith unto them, Go ye also into the vineyard; and whatsoever is right, that shall ye receive.
8So when even was come, the lord of the vineyard saith unto his steward, Call the labourers, and give them their hire, beginning from the last unto the first.
9And when they came that were hired about the eleventh hour, they received every man a penny.
10But when the first came, they supposed that they should have received more; and they likewise received every man a penny.
11And when they had received it, they murmured against the goodman of the house,
12Saying, These last have wrought but one hour, and thou hast made them equal unto us, which have borne the burden and heat of the day.
13But he answered one of them, and said, Friend, I do thee no wrong: didst not thou agree with me for a penny?
14Take that thine is, and go thy way: I will give unto this last, even as unto thee.
15Is it not lawful for me to do what I will with mine own? Is thine eye evil, because I am good?
16So the last shall be first, and the first last: for many be called, but few chosen.


Will you be one of the chosen?

[Mrs. Rogers]

Originally Posted by Fish

If you have a problem with salvation then that is your business.

Where on earth do you get the idea that I have a problem with salvation? Where in my post, exactly?

I think you have a problem with the scenario I posted - a scenerio that could well manifest if both you and your wife's abuser are saved, and if your wife continues to reject Jesus. Why is that? God is merciful, as you know; you'll have no sorrow with regard to your wife's fate - I daresay you'll not remember her at all, actually - and neither will her abuser remember the awfulness he inflicted upon her.

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away. (Revelation 21:4)

Isn't that wonderful news? In the interium, however, I suggest you try to come to grips with the nature of God Himself, as He has no place for silly human sentiment. If your wife doesn't find salvation, He'll see no difference between her and every other unsaved person - and there's bound to be a few child rapists who didn't get around to accepting Christ as Saviour - and they'll all be thrown in the pit together, equalized by the fires of hell.

But we won't care - and what a blessed relief that is to know.

[Fish (On Moderation)]

Jesus told us to love our enemies and pray for us that persecute us. And he practiced what he preached when he prayed for those who crucified him.

IF my wifes abuser repents (which i personally doubt because i know the man) and if he accepts Christ then he is a new creature. Why should his past sins be held against him?

[Brother Temperance]

Originally Posted by Mrs. Rogers

Well, wonders will never cease - I never expected to see True Christian™ wisdom hidden within any sentence of yours. The posting "all I like" being the lifetime of terrible sins committed by your wife's abuser, the $5 being his deathbed conversion; the exemption from banning being his narrow escape from the bowels of hell. His place within the Heavenly Choir guaranteed for all eternity ... who knows, he might even be placed next to you, should you repent of your catholicism...

Is it possible for a Catholic to become saved, or is there something about Catholic idolatry that counts as blasphemy against the Holy Ghost? It's an interesting theological question.

[SalvationSeeker]

Originally Posted by Fish

That's low. Even for you.

If you can't handle the truth, join a cathylicker forum instead, you limpy wristed homer.
Learn to discipline your harlot of a wife properly next time.
Also, it sounds to me like you are cursed by God for rejecting His eternal commandments:

Thou shalt betroth a wife, and another man shall lie with her:
Thou shalt build an house, and thou shalt not dwell therein: thou shalt plant a vineyard, and shalt not gather the grapes thereof.
Deuteronomy 28:30

PRAISE JESUS!
THERE IS NO ESCAPE FROM HIS RIGHTEOUS WRATH!