Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > Straight 4 Jesus! (Back Door Christians)
Reload this Page Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay
Straight 4 Jesus! (Back Door Christians) At LBC, we will cure your perversion of choice (even if we have to stone you).

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
Daisy Mae Johnson's Avatar
Daisy Mae Johnson Daisy Mae Johnson is offline
The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
True Christian™

Best Pie One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Christian Love Best Pie Long service medal, 2nd class Cleanest Kitchen Saved 5 Years Platinum Tither True Christian Lady Best Pie True Christian Homemaker Real American™ Mother of 1 boy or 2.5 girls The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ribfest '09 Daisy Home Schooled Best stoning bucket Heaven Bound The Lord’s Witness Wound Protected by JESUS Punched the most queers TC Bravery Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient Born again virgin Persecuted Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor In Love With Zeke Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Paula Deen Negro Support Group Touched by Jesus Babysitter Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Pie Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Trumpette Anti-sodomy Mission to Messico Hands Off Long service medal, 3rd class 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Mama Grizzly Pastor Ezekiel Aardvark Crown of Rejoicing BFF of Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-27-2007, 03:52 PM

Brothers and Sisters, we here at GOD's Favorite Church™ are very eager to stomp out sin before it begins.

The following are pictures on how to tell if your baby is going to be gay.

If you see any of these signs I recommend you have him neutered (as GOD commands) before it has a chance to grow up and sodomize other people.

We all know that GOD finds homers an abomination.

With Lve and Compassion, Sister Thumper
Attached Images
 




Tweet me Here
My GODLY Bio Here

Last edited by Daisy Mae Johnson; 03-27-2007 at 03:55 PM.
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
Brother Temperance's Avatar
Brother Temperance Brother Temperance is offline
Senior Usher
True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
A very nice young man
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Real American™ Long service medal, 2nd class Christian Love Saved 5 Years The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking True Heterosexual™ Ex-Christ-Killer Public Awareness Medal Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus TC Bravery Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork Ex-Brit True Republican Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-28-2007, 05:41 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
(this baby is Hellbound anyway for being a homer, Godless chink)
What's the betting it was also born out of wedlock?


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
bonzo2 (On Moderation) bonzo2 is offline
Foul Sinner on Moderation
 
Posts: 141
Join Date: Mar 2007
bonzo2 is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-28-2007, 07:26 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
Brothers and Sisters, we here at GOD's Favorite Church™ are very eager to stomp out sin before it begins.

The following are pictures on how to tell if your baby is going to be gay.

If you see any of these signs I recommend you stone it to death (as GOD commands) before it has a chance to grow up and sodomize other people.

We all know that GOD finds homers an abomination.

With Lve and Compassion, Sister Thumper

(this baby is Hellbound anyway for being a homer, Godless chink)

The child is obviously teething and thats we he is biting on the door stop If he is showing signs of homosexuality at this age its nature and not nurture = genteics perhaps?
Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
Bobby-Joe's Avatar
Bobby-Joe Bobby-Joe is offline
Landover Security Superviser
Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert
NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Long service medal, 2nd class Saved 1 Year Saved 5 Years True Heterosexual™ True Christian Provider™ award 2008 Witch Hunt Award Real American™ Ex-Mary Worshipper The Lord’s Witness Wound Tagging for Jesus Heaven Bound TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Punched the most queers Ex-Masturbator True Christian Justice of the Peace Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Home Schooled Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth Super Soaker Baptism Award Tell her once Silver Tither Gunfest '07 Christian Love Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Las Vegas Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior

 
Posts: 18,555
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-28-2007, 07:31 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bonzo2 View Post
The child is obviously teething and thats we he is biting on the door stop If he is showing signs of homosexuality at this age its nature and not nurture = genteics perhaps?
No friend, the child is making a choice to be a homer. This is not surprising because the child also chose not to be born white so there is no end to the evil of this demon possessed baby.



Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

Hot Must ReadThreads!


Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
Reply With Quote
(#5)
Old
M.D. (Quarantined) M.D. is offline
Disgusting Unsaved Trash Who is Using the Computer at Hellion's House!
Please contact Brother Bobby Joe and the security team at the first sign of misbehaviour.
Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
 
Posts: 106
Join Date: Mar 2007
M.D. is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-28-2007, 10:43 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
Brothers and Sisters, we here at GOD's Favorite Church™ are very eager to stomp out sin before it begins.

The following are pictures on how to tell if your baby is going to be gay.

If you see any of these signs I recommend you stone it to death (as GOD commands) before it has a chance to grow up and sodomize other people.

We all know that GOD finds homers an abomination.

With Lve and Compassion, Sister Thumper

(this baby is Hellbound anyway for being a homer, Godless chink)
Or said baby is teething and and chewing on the door stop in an attempt to relieve the pain... There are no signs for homosexuality at that early of an age. The child's brain has not fully developed and is not particularly interested in sex anyway.
Reply With Quote
(#6)
Old
Wash O'Hanley's Avatar
Wash O'Hanley Wash O'Hanley is offline
Debate Moderator (and participant)
Master Debater-- Has Never Been Defeated in a Debate
Louder Than Reason
True Christian™

True Christian™ Saved 1 Year Fairest and most balanced broadcaster Saved 5 Years Real American™ Gold Tither Publisher's Choice TC Bravery Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth Persecuted Pro-Life True Republican

 
Posts: 2,139
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Wash O'Hanley will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wash O'Hanley will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wash O'Hanley will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wash O'Hanley will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wash O'Hanley will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wash O'Hanley will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wash O'Hanley will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wash O'Hanley will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wash O'Hanley will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wash O'Hanley will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wash O'Hanley will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-28-2007, 11:13 PM

I am afraid to know what that little homo's room looks like but I have a sinking suspicion that the drapes are "fabulous".
Reply With Quote
(#7)
Old
OnYourKnees's Avatar
OnYourKnees OnYourKnees is offline
On Extended Furlough
True Christian™
 
Posts: 4,784
Join Date: Nov 2006
OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-28-2007, 11:21 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by M.D. View Post
Or said baby is teething and and chewing on the door stop in an attempt to relieve the pain... There are no signs for homosexuality at that early of an age. The child's brain has not fully developed and is not particularly interested in sex anyway.
When you wish to post information about human development (or anything else) that is supposedly based in your "science", please include references.

All you've done so far is make things up, decide they must be true, and present them as fact. I'm sorry, but some person making things up isn't "science" and it isn't "fact". It's FICTION!

Whenever we tell you what God does or thinks or wants, we can give you a reference. Why can't you give references for your "science"? Is it because you haven't got any?
Reply With Quote
(#8)
Old
M.D. (Quarantined) M.D. is offline
Disgusting Unsaved Trash Who is Using the Computer at Hellion's House!
Please contact Brother Bobby Joe and the security team at the first sign of misbehaviour.
Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
 
Posts: 106
Join Date: Mar 2007
M.D. is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-28-2007, 11:44 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by OnYourKnees View Post
When you wish to post information about human development (or anything else) that is supposedly based in your "science", please include references.

All you've done so far is make things up, decide they must be true, and present them as fact. I'm sorry, but some person making things up isn't "science" and it isn't "fact". It's FICTION!

Whenever we tell you what God does or thinks or wants, we can give you a reference. Why can't you give references for your "science"? Is it because you haven't got any?
Look it up. Try wikipedia, you'll probably find it. Do you know why a baby's head is so soft and fragile? The plates in the skull haven't finished growing. They are slightly seperated to allow the brain to grow.
Reply With Quote
(#9)
Old
M.D. (Quarantined) M.D. is offline
Disgusting Unsaved Trash Who is Using the Computer at Hellion's House!
Please contact Brother Bobby Joe and the security team at the first sign of misbehaviour.
Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
 
Posts: 106
Join Date: Mar 2007
M.D. is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-28-2007, 11:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by OnYourKnees View Post
When you wish to post information about human development (or anything else) that is supposedly based in your "science", please include references.

All you've done so far is make things up, decide they must be true, and present them as fact. I'm sorry, but some person making things up isn't "science" and it isn't "fact". It's FICTION!

Whenever we tell you what God does or thinks or wants, we can give you a reference. Why can't you give references for your "science"? Is it because you haven't got any?
If you really want to know...
“More than 50 percent of brain
growth occurs in the first year of
life, so when one or more sutures prematurely
close, the brain cannot expand
in that area and therefore must
expand in another direction,” explained
Bruce Kaufman, MD, a pediatric
neurosurgeon and member of the
American Association of Neurological
Surgeons. “Such growth can result in
pressure on the brain and disfigurement
of the skull. A pediatric neurosurgeon
can confirm the presence of
craniosynostosis using diagnostic tests
like x-rays and computed tomography
scans.”
Reply With Quote
(#10)
Old
Brother Temperance's Avatar
Brother Temperance Brother Temperance is offline
Senior Usher
True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
A very nice young man
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Real American™ Long service medal, 2nd class Christian Love Saved 5 Years The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking True Heterosexual™ Ex-Christ-Killer Public Awareness Medal Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus TC Bravery Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork Ex-Brit True Republican Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-28-2007, 11:54 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by M.D. View Post
Look it up. Try wikipedia, you'll probably find it. Do you know why a baby's head is so soft and fragile? The plates in the skull haven't finished growing. They are slightly seperated to allow the brain to grow.
You think babies have plates in their heads?


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
Reply With Quote
(#11)
Old
OnYourKnees's Avatar
OnYourKnees OnYourKnees is offline
On Extended Furlough
True Christian™
 
Posts: 4,784
Join Date: Nov 2006
OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-28-2007, 11:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by M.D. View Post
If you really want to know...
“More than 50 percent of brain
growth occurs in the first year of
life, so when one or more sutures prematurely
close, the brain cannot expand
in that area and therefore must
expand in another direction,” explained
Bruce Kaufman, MD, a pediatric
neurosurgeon and member of the
American Association of Neurological
Surgeons. “Such growth can result in
pressure on the brain and disfigurement
of the skull. A pediatric neurosurgeon
can confirm the presence of
craniosynostosis using diagnostic tests
like x-rays and computed tomography
scans.”
That's lovely. I meant the part about how homer babies aren't interested in sexuality -- or babies in general. You know, the part you made up.

I thought you said it was genetically or biologically determined; now you say that they have no "feelings about sexuality" until they're adults? That doesn't make sense.

http://net-burst.net/hope/infant_sex.htm <-- here's the first thing that came up when I Googled "infant sexuality".

Last edited by OnYourKnees; 03-28-2007 at 11:59 PM.
Reply With Quote
(#12)
Old
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-29-2007, 11:06 AM

Instead of wasting your time with any one of the countless anonymous "experts" on homerism who are openly darwinists, I'd like to draw you doubter's attention to the most successful True Christian*#153; research AND CURE for child homerism.

Quote:
As we all know, people CHOOSE to be gay. And what is so surprising is the tender ages at which some of our most outlandish gay tykes chose to embrace this immoral lifestyle! While a one year old may not know that a round peg does not fit in a square hole - this doesn't stop many of them from using round pegs as their ungodly role-models to choose a lifestyle that will keep them from fitting into your Christian Family. I can't tell you how many mothers and fathers of children younger than 10, whom they used to be proud of, have come to me and said, "Mrs. Bowers, I have noticed that my son seems to like to do swishy, girly things. What should I do?" Well, let me tell you!

Noted lush and dear Sister in Christ Mrs. Dora Denkins came to me because when her 4 year old boy played "house" he insisted on method-acting the role of an immaculately groomed wife who wore silk cocktail dresses dawn-to-dusk and obeyed her drunken husband in every respect (even behind the closed doors of their Christian marital bedroom). While I applauded the Biblical authenticity of such a role, I pointed out to Mrs. Denkins that her son was obviously a submissive drag-queen in the making and, if left to his own devices, would likely turn into a prepubescent Barbara Billingsly right under her horrified nose!

So many foolish parents throw up their hands saying, "But, Betty, there is nothing we can do!"

Naturally, I want to grab them by their shoulders and shake the Holy Spirit into their wishy-washy beings, and scream: "Children are not born gay! That is a lie broadcast by Satan himself from the very pit of Hell itself! It is a well known fact that homosexuals CHOOSE to be gay! And if your toddler can choose to embrace an immoral, ungodly lifestyle, they can darn-well choose TO CHANGE THEIR DAMNED LITTLE TWO-YEAR OLD MINDS!"

Has Your Toddler Impetuously Chosen to Embrace an Ungodly Lifestyle And Act Like A Damned Homo?

Take BASH KIDS' simple True or False test to find out if your child is a candidate for heterosexual rehabilitation!
  • When you take your 5 year old son to look at the action figures at Toys R Us, does he gaze longingly at the "Special Edition Jean-Paul Gaultier Fabulous Manhattan Hostess Barbie," but scoffs, "How outré for evening, Mommy! And that cut is so 'Friends' two seasons ago!"
  • When your 1 year old boy first stands up, is it to perform a perfectly executed plié?
  • Does 3 year old Barbara convert her pink Barbie Townhouse into a Meineke Muffler franchise?
  • Does 2 year old little Bobby crawl out of his Baby Gap denim overalls, only to show up for feeding wearing a smart cashmere sweater set and a simple strand of pearls?
  • Does your 4 year old little girl eschew dainty lace for corduroy and rewire the electrical outlets on your porch?
  • When you have dinner guests, does your 8 year old boy climb out of his bunk-bed, slip into something sequined, and slink down the staircase regaling your guests with a heart-rending, coquettish version of "The Man Who Got Away" like a 4 foot, liquored-up Judy Garland?
  • Does Daddy's Little Princess pass up tulle for tools?
  • Does your 6 year old son shriek in ghastly apoplexy until you agree to wear Prada to the parent/teacher meeting?
  • Does your little boy keep throwing out all your silk floral arrangements while you are sleeping and calling reputable florists to have everything replaced with impeccably chosen exotic blooms that are new to you, but he knows by name and scent?
  • When your little daughter utters her first word, does she talk like a sailor?
  • Does your 8 year old boy complain that your pumps are sporting "last season's heel," that you look "too off-the-rack" or sneer that "not even housefraus in Nebraska are wearing that tired Ralph Lauren fragrance"?
  • When cleaning out from under your little girl's bed, do you invariably find long-neck beer bottles and blue chalk for pool cues?
  • When you walk into the room wearing a new dress, does your husband barely notice, but your 7 year old son breathlessly exclaims: "Cerise and aubergine! To-die-for, Mommy!"
  • When you take your children to Blockbuster, does your little girl cry if you don't rent "Personal Best" or does your little boy try to shoplift the wide-screen version of "Funny Girl"?


If any answer is Yes: Your willful child has made the choice to embrace an ungodly homosexual lifestyle and is going straight to Hell. Your only hope is BASH for Toddlers $4,000 Righteous Intervention. Sign up NOW!

If all answers are No: Your child is very crafty in hiding their decision to embrace an ungodly homosexual lifestyle, but is probably going straight to Hell anyway as our Blessed Lord sees behind every closet door! Your only hope is BASH for Toddlers $4,000 Righteous Intervention. Sign up NOW!


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
(#13)
Old
Rachael Van Helsing's Avatar
Rachael Van Helsing Rachael Van Helsing is offline
HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
Forum Member

Hellbound Heathen Cancer on Society Uppity Woman/Enabler Witch

 
Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Rachael Van Helsing is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-29-2007, 11:17 AM

Have you noticed that, from what you just posted there, Zekey, it implies that all toddlers are, in fact, homosexual.



Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
Reply With Quote
(#14)
Old
Pastor Isaac Peters's Avatar
Pastor Isaac Peters Pastor Isaac Peters is offline
Senior Pastor
Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
Always Biblically correct
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Publisher's Choice True Heterosexual™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Tithing Manager Christian Love Ex-Mary Worshipper Long service medal, 2nd class Senior Pastor Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture Ex-liberal True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork Outreach preacher True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Anti-sodomy Hands Off Crown of Glory Probing for Jesus Alternative Facts Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-29-2007, 12:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
Have you noticed that, from what you just posted there, Zekey, it implies that all toddlers are, in fact, homosexual.
Leave it to Mrs. Van Headlice not to understand a clear example of Christian love and compassion. We True Christians™ understand that we are talking about the eternal destinies of our precious children, so we choose to err on the side of caution and bring as many as possible to Salvation™.

You, on the other hand, seem perfectly content to run the risk that they will make the homosexual deathstyle choice and slide off into eternal damnation. Why do you hate them with such a passion? What did they ever do to you, that you should wish such a fate on them?


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

Reply With Quote
(#15)
Old
Daniel's Avatar
Daniel Daniel is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
 
Posts: 112
Join Date: Feb 2007
Daniel is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.Daniel is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.Daniel is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-29-2007, 02:16 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
Brothers and Sisters, we here at GOD's Favorite Church™ are very eager to stomp out sin before it begins.

The following are pictures on how to tell if your baby is going to be gay.

If you see any of these signs I recommend you have it neutered (as GOD commands) before it has a chance to grow up and sodomize other people.

We all know that GOD finds homers an abomination.

With Lve and Compassion, Sister Thumper

(this baby is Hellbound anyway for being a homer, Godless chink)
Has this baby participated in the Bible crawl?
Reply With Quote
(#16)
Old
M.D. (Quarantined) M.D. is offline
Disgusting Unsaved Trash Who is Using the Computer at Hellion's House!
Please contact Brother Bobby Joe and the security team at the first sign of misbehaviour.
Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
 
Posts: 106
Join Date: Mar 2007
M.D. is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-29-2007, 09:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by OnYourKnees View Post
That's lovely. I meant the part about how homer babies aren't interested in sexuality -- or babies in general. You know, the part you made up.

I thought you said it was genetically or biologically determined; now you say that they have no "feelings about sexuality" until they're adults? That doesn't make sense.

http://net-burst.net/hope/infant_sex.htm <-- here's the first thing that came up when I Googled "infant sexuality".
When babies are first born they may have an excess amount of hormones, causing sexual acts. But it usually goes away. The vast majority of infants only have so many hormones, and not until their teen years do they recieve enough to go through puberty and thus actually be interested in sex. What you read was either fake like most sites are, misinterpretation on the parents part, or perhaps excess hormones.
Reply With Quote
(#17)
Old
bonzo2 (On Moderation) bonzo2 is offline
Foul Sinner on Moderation
 
Posts: 141
Join Date: Mar 2007
bonzo2 is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-31-2007, 01:42 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Instead of wasting your time with any one of the countless anonymous "experts" on homerism who are openly darwinists, I'd like to draw you doubter's attention to the most successful True Christian*#153; research AND CURE for child homerism.

doesnt leave much room for manouvre!!
Reply With Quote
(#18)
Old
OnYourKnees's Avatar
OnYourKnees OnYourKnees is offline
On Extended Furlough
True Christian™
 
Posts: 4,784
Join Date: Nov 2006
OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.OnYourKnees is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-31-2007, 02:07 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by M.D. View Post
When babies are first born they may have an excess amount of hormones, causing sexual acts. But it usually goes away. The vast majority of infants only have so many hormones, and not until their teen years do they recieve enough to go through puberty and thus actually be interested in sex. What you read was either fake like most sites are, misinterpretation on the parents part, or perhaps excess hormones.
I suppose Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung were fake, too.
Reply With Quote
(#19)
Old
SalvationSeeker's Avatar
SalvationSeeker SalvationSeeker is offline
True Christian™ Theologian
Forum Member
 
Posts: 3,979
Join Date: Sep 2006
SalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-31-2007, 02:53 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by M.D. View Post
When babies are first born they may have an excess amount of hormones, causing sexual acts. But it usually goes away. The vast majority of infants only have so many hormones, and not until their teen years do they recieve enough to go through puberty and thus actually be interested in sex. What you read was either fake like most sites are, misinterpretation on the parents part, or perhaps excess hormones.
Right..
Admit it, you're making this up as you go along, don't you?
Your beliefs have no consisteny, and you are ready to backflip on any statement you make as soon as you fancy to change your mind..
Which you seem to do very often.

If science is about facts then how come that those "facts" constantly change and/or are replaced?


If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
Reply With Quote
(#20)
Old
bonzo2 (On Moderation) bonzo2 is offline
Foul Sinner on Moderation
 
Posts: 141
Join Date: Mar 2007
bonzo2 is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay - 03-31-2007, 09:59 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by M.D. View Post
When babies are first born they may have an excess amount of hormones, causing sexual acts. But it usually goes away. The vast majority of infants only have so many hormones, and not until their teen years do they recieve enough to go through puberty and thus actually be interested in sex. What you read was either fake like most sites are, misinterpretation on the parents part, or perhaps excess hormones.

I wonder if the children mentioned in the link have been subjected to sexual abuse? Some of their behaviour appears sexualised which is anm indicator of abuse - behaviour beyond their chronological age i.e. the little girl and the doll is a little concerning!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
babies, child rearing, fags cause the aids, homosexuals, parenting, queers

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved