Promise Enforcers - Men Only! We make Promise Keepers look like homers! No homosexuals or women allowed! |
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 207
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: At my home, reading my bible.
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-04-2010, 11:42 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Barnabus
Now that you mention it , there is something fishy going on with the pie at my place too. The other night I could swear there were ice crystals in the blueberries. The Mrs. supposedly just made that pie that morning!!.
I'm pretty lenient about most things. The cup cakes don't have to be perfect.
The honey buns can be a little saggy. The sweet rolls can be a little dry.
But darn it my pies have to be fresh, mouth-watering tasty and a lip smacking delight. If my Mrs. is in on this conspiracy you can bet there will be hell to pay!!!
|
If my wife is involved, she will have to endure a hell of a thrashing. Now that I think about it, the pies I've been eating in the last couple of days tasted different from her normal. I remember seeing some boxes or something in the trash but thought nothing of it.
|
|
Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 02:04 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by David Micheal
If my wife is involved, she will have to endure a hell of a thrashing. Now that I think about it, the pies I've been eating in the last couple of days tasted different from her normal. I remember seeing some boxes or something in the trash but thought nothing of it.
|
It sounds to me like your wife could be a major player in this whole lesbian blood orgy conspiracy. She could even be the kingpin.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
|
#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
|
|
Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 02:43 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mistress Cookie
Again, please do not report that I am helping with this investigation, but "Yes", you can buy frozen strudels at the supermarket.
HOWEVER, a super-crafty chef adept in trickery would try to throw you off the track by buying frozen phyllo dough, and then assemble the "strudel" using that dough combined with a homemade filling.
It's only the repeated stretching and pulling and rolling of that particular type of crust that's hard. And it's undoubtedly the first place a wayward wife would try to cut corners.
.
|
Mistress Cookie, I feel so used, I found boxes of frozen phyllo dough in the freezer. What is next canned cherry pie filling from a store, canned apple filing from a store. Phebe is not herself lately, its as if she has lost her love of baking. Today I asked her to make a Carmel nut coffee cake for my breakfast in the morning. She turned a bit green and ran off to the ladies room. Do I make her sick?
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 378
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: North Texas (Buckle of Bible Belt)
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 08:02 AM
Well guys, you know the old saying "Give a woman an inch and she'll want six". We'll have to nip this nonsense in the bud and pronto!
Nahum 1:2
God is jealous, and the LORD revengeth; the LORD revengeth, and is furious; the LORD will take vengeance on his adversaries, and he reserveth wrath for his enemies.
If God is Love ... Who created Hell??!!
|
|
Winning Souls in his Winnebago
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 3,893
Join Date: May 2010
Location: travelling the heartland in my Winnebago.
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 10:27 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Dewitt
Mistress Cookie, I feel so used, I found boxes of frozen phyllo dough in the freezer. What is next canned cherry pie filling from a store, canned apple filing from a store. Phebe is not herself lately, its as if she has lost her love of baking. Today I asked her to make a Carmel nut coffee cake for my breakfast in the morning. She turned a bit green and ran off to the ladies room. Do I make her sick?
|
You haven't been served a twinkie with a scoop of breyers vanilla ice cream for dessert have you? Guess the honeymoon is over friend.
1 Chronicles 16:15
Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 132
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Oak Ridge, TN
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 11:17 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Dewitt
Mistress Cookie, I feel so used, I found boxes of frozen phyllo dough in the freezer. What is next canned cherry pie filling from a store, canned apple filing from a store. Phebe is not herself lately, its as if she has lost her love of baking. Today I asked her to make a Carmel nut coffee cake for my breakfast in the morning. She turned a bit green and ran off to the ladies room. Do I make her sick?
|
Forgive me for looking in here, sirs, but I saw the word "pie" in the thread title and clicked without thinking.
Mister Dewitt, I bet Sister Phebe is pregnant. When my ma is pregnant she gets all sick when it's time to bake so I usually take over all the baking duties until the baby is born.
Girls for God
Ephesians 5:22
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
|
#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
|
|
Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 12:35 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie1
Forgive me for looking in here, sirs, but I saw the word "pie" in the thread title and clicked without thinking.
Mister Dewitt, I bet Sister Phebe is pregnant. When my ma is pregnant she gets all sick when it's time to bake so I usually take over all the baking duties until the baby is born.
|
Miss Annie, why are you posting in the men's section? If you were my daughter we would be having this chat while you where bent over my knees. There would be some red hand prints on the bare bottom.
|
|
True Christian™ Entrepreneur
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,695
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Leviticus Landing Gated Community, Freehold IA
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 06:02 PM
I can't help but feel this has something to do with the upcoming congressional elections. You know that the liberals will stop at nothing to maintain power, so they can continue to destroy America. And it makes sense they would somehow involve pies in their systematic destruction of the country.
|
|
Honorary True Christian™
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 13,993
Join Date: May 2008
Location: North Salem, Indiana
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 06:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Dewitt
Today I asked her to make a Carmel nut coffee cake for my breakfast in the morning. She turned a bit green and ran off to the ladies room. Do I make her sick?
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie1
Mister Dewitt, I bet Sister Phebe is pregnant. When my ma is pregnant she gets all sick when it's time to bake so I usually take over all the baking duties until the baby is born.
|
As much as I hate to suggest a young girl could be correct, I'm thinking that may be the case. I was about to suggest the very same, in fact.
Is there any way possible Sister Phebe is pregnant?
Edit: Or maybe she's really starting a Satanic Lezbean Cult with secret meetings where they "Sit and Knit" voodoo dolls!
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
|
#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
|
|
Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 06:40 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer
As much as I hate to suggest a young girl could be correct, I'm thinking that may be the case. I was about to suggest the very same, in fact.
Is there any way possible Sister Phebe is pregnant?
|
I dont think so she is still quite trim. When my first wife( May God Take pity on her cold slut heart, where ever she is) was with child she was the size of a house.
I really don't understand how she does it, last night she ate a 2lb Porterhouse steak, baked tater, salad, and a big bowl of strawberries.
Later while viewing the 700 club, she went through a 2lb box of chocolate.
I think she is just getting lazy and wont bake pies and such. Lamar cooked dinner last night. Its kinda funny when she tires to bake anything she gets ill, shove a hunk of beef infont of her and watch out for the sparks comming off the knife and fork.
|
|
Honorary True Christian™
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 13,993
Join Date: May 2008
Location: North Salem, Indiana
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 06:57 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Dewitt
I dont think so she is still quite trim. When my first wife( May God Take pity on her cold slut heart, where ever she is) was with child she was the size of a house.
I really don't understand how she does it, last night she ate a 2lb Porterhouse steak, baked tater, salad, and a big bowl of strawberries.
Later while viewing the 700 club, she went through a 2lb box of chocolate.
I think she is just getting lazy and wont bake pies and such. Lamar cooked dinner last night. Its kinda funny when she tires to bake anything she gets ill, shove a hunk of beef infont of her and watch out for the sparks comming off the knife and fork.
|
Well, that's mighty odd.
Has she tried one of Helen's meat pies? That might be ideal for her. Oh, and Helen makes wonderful muffins as well. Believe me, you haven't lived until you've chowed down on Helen's meat-filled muffins. They're so moist and delicious, with big chunks of beef deep inside!
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
|
#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
|
|
Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 07:08 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer
Well, that's mighty odd.
Has she tried one of Helen's meat pies? That might be ideal for her. Oh, and Helen makes wonderful muffins as well. Believe me, you haven't lived until you've chowed down on Helen's meat-filled muffins. They're so moist and delicious, with big chunks of beef deep inside!
|
Rev. Its not that she cant eat, she just cant cook anymore. I did not want to ask Helen to do it, do you think she will? Its been a while I am in the mood for a different pie.
Phebe and Helen are out shopping this after noon. Phebe left a note that her shoes had shrunk and needed wider ones. Must be cheap shoes. I think I will send her into Chicago for some new ones after whe get back from Sister Charlies wedding.
|
|
Petite pearl of Baptist womanhood
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 6,686
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Woodlawn Drive, Freehold, USA USA USA
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 07:18 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Dewitt
Mistress Cookie, I feel so used, I found boxes of frozen phyllo dough in the freezer. What is next canned cherry pie filling from a store, canned apple filing from a store. Phebe is not herself lately, its as if she has lost her love of baking.
|
Well, you know how I hate to get involved in other people's business, but I would also point out that phyllo dough is of Greek origin.
I am not saying anyone would have to go to an actual foreign food store to get some, but nevertheless, it cannot be denied that that product is also used for making Baklava and other Greecian "delicacies".
Make of this what you will....as I said, I've always been averse to becoming embroiled in private matters, so I draw no conclussions, myself.
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 207
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: At my home, reading my bible.
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 09:14 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
It sounds to me like your wife could be a major player in this whole lesbian blood orgy conspiracy. She could even be the kingpin.
|
My wife? I never would have thought. I'm going to demand a explanation I will go to extreme measures to get the information. After she admits the truth to me I will have her apologize to the family. I WILL take proper disciplinary action after wards.
I feel so used, after being such a wonderful husband to her, she dare try to pull a stunt like this behind my back.
|
|
Honorary True Christian™
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 13,993
Join Date: May 2008
Location: North Salem, Indiana
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 09:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mistress Cookie
Well, you know how I hate to get involved in other people's business, but I would also point out that phyllo dough is of Greek origin.
I am not saying anyone would have to go to an actual foreign food store to get some, but nevertheless, it cannot be denied that that product is also used for making Baklava and other Greecian "delicacies".
Make of this what you will....as I said, I've always been averse to becoming embroiled in private matters, so I draw no conclussions, myself.
|
Are you suggesting that the Ladies of Landover are getting involved in "Greek explorations"?!
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 207
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: At my home, reading my bible.
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 09:48 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer
Are you suggesting that the Ladies of Landover are getting involved in "Greek explorations"?!
|
This might go further and deeper than we ever would have first thought! Perhaps all of our wives are doing all kinds of things that we never noticed. Maybe they have been doing this whole thing for a long time and we just now noticed!
This madness must come to an end.
|
|
Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-05-2010, 11:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by David Micheal
This might go further and deeper than we ever would have first thought! Perhaps all of our wives are doing all kinds of things that we never noticed. Maybe they have been doing this whole thing for a long time and we just now noticed!
This madness must come to an end.
|
My ex-wife Ethel was a very naughty woman. She was always doing things like burning dinner, sassing me, and running away from home. Then one day I brought her home from a porn shoot where I caught her engaged in lesbian cunnilingus. The next morning I woke up and found her stoned to death in the yard. That's when I decided to marry Cindy Lou. She is much more... willing than Ethel ever was.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 207
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: At my home, reading my bible.
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-06-2010, 12:30 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
My ex-wife Ethel was a very naughty woman. She was always doing things like burning dinner, sassing me, and running away from home. Then one day I brought her home from a porn shoot where I caught her engaged in lesbian cunnilingus. The next morning I woke up and found her stoned to death in the yard. That's when I decided to marry Cindy Lou. She is much more... willing than Ethel ever was.
|
I must keep a better eye on my wife. We can't let her run around doing what ever she wants and ruining the household, and potentially other households.
|
|
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
|
|
Posts: 9
Join Date: Oct 2010
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-06-2010, 01:13 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Dewitt
Mistress Cookie, I feel so used, I found boxes of frozen phyllo dough in the freezer. What is next canned cherry pie filling from a store, canned apple filing from a store. Phebe is not herself lately, its as if she has lost her love of baking. Today I asked her to make a Carmel nut coffee cake for my breakfast in the morning. She turned a bit green and ran off to the ladies room. Do I make her sick?
|
Brother James, Could her sickness mean you have a Soldier for Christ on the way? That could explain the running to the restroom, I think
|
|
Unsaved trash Hateful God mocking pirate
|
|
Posts: 6,336
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: The Land of the Beer Volcano and Stripper Factory.
|
|
Re: Pie conspiracy -
10-06-2010, 01:52 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
I get it flown in from Intercourse, Pennsylvania. They grow the best rhubarb in the world.
|
Wrong
The BEST rhubarb in the world is grown in the Rhubarb Triangle in Yorkshire ENGLAND.
|
Thread Tools |
|
Display Modes |
Linear Mode
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved
|