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Reload this Page I'm working on a form letter for newbies
The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

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Jeb Stuart Thurmond's Avatar
Jeb Stuart Thurmond Jeb Stuart Thurmond is offline
Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
 

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Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Lightbulb I'm working on a form letter for newbies - 01-04-2019, 05:08 PM

A work in progress.

The idea is that the irrelevant parts get crossed out and the relevant parts get bolded:



Greetings and God Bless:
  • Fellow True Christian
  • Suspected False Christian
  • Confused Lost Soul
  • Unidentified/Unclassifiable Unsaved Trash
  • Satanic Puddle of Vile Darkness
Please read and understand:
  • The basics of civilized discourse. Our policy on cyber-bullying.
  • The answer to your unoriginal question, see Frequently Asked Questions, or use Forum Search, Republican Search engine, tag system, or our guides on Geography, History, Science, Comparative Religion, Civics, and Current Events.
  • Our Terms & Conditions:
    Quote:
    Forum Terms & Rules Please take a moment to review a brief history of Landover Baptist and the rules detailed below. You MUST agree to them in order to proceed with your registration. To cancel this registration, simply hit the 'back' button on your browser. Landover Baptist Church is nearly as old as America itself. Our community has served as the moral compass for our great Christian Nation for nearly 217 years. Our initially sheltered society of Fundamentalists is still a heavily gated religious community but it has grown to over 52,000 members with a large presence on the Internet. Church members provide support, prayer, and firm rebuke to those of us who are called by Jesus to wander beyond the walls of our gated Christian community in Freehold, Iowa. We invite you to join us with a sense of fellowship that you are among brothers and sisters who wish nothing more than to share the good news that Jesus Christ is going to send every single person on Earth who doesn't believe in Him, straight to Hell. If you are saved, please feel free to interact with us. If you are unsaved, please leave now. Sometimes the Devil and his minions creep into our message boards to try to slander us and mock us. Be warned that the messages you read here express the views of the author of the message, not the views of the Landover Baptist Church Community. Any user who feels that a posted message is objectionable is encouraged to contact us immediately by email. We will print the message out and pray over it. If Jesus tells us that it is offensive, we will use His holy power to remove it. We will make every effort to do so, within a reasonable time frame, if we determine that removal is necessary. 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Thank you for your:
  • unsupported opinion(s)
  • empty slogan(s),
  • Three Word Chant! Three Word Chant!
  • repetition of one the same 3 out-of context Sunday-School scripture quotes that are the complete Biblical knowledge of every false-Christian
We have not been successfully manipulated by your use of the following slimey leftist rhetorical manipulation trick(s):To continue our relationship, please:
  • Send me your credit card information
  • Tell us more about yourself
  • Clarify where you stand politically
  • Explain the main point of factual disagreement, and help form a base of agreed common ground
  • Learn the basics of grammar, punctuation, and readable text
  • Improve your English skills
  • Wait for the drugs to wear off
  • Wait for the drugs to kick in
  • Pull the bone out of your nose
  • Get on your knees and beg sweet Jesus for forgiveness
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Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
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Last edited by Jeb Stuart Thurmond; 12-12-2020 at 08:43 PM.
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Brother Luci's Avatar
Brother Luci Brother Luci is offline
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation

Barney Cancer on Society

 
Posts: 8
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: Axia, The Capital
Brother Luci is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: I'm working on a form letter for newbies - 01-04-2019, 06:04 PM

You really seem to be filled with a lot of hatred, somewhere deep inside. God is about love and nothing else right? Spread the love, not the judgement.
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Jeb Stuart Thurmond's Avatar
Jeb Stuart Thurmond Jeb Stuart Thurmond is offline
Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
 

Public Awareness Medal One Year/1000 posts Long service medal, 2nd class Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Real American™ Saved 5 Years Gold Tither Heaven Bound TC Bravery TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Tagging for Jesus Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork True Republican Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Hatchet Child Rearing Award Touched by Jesus Alternative Facts Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I'm working on a form letter for newbies - 01-04-2019, 06:20 PM

Greetings and God Bless:
  • Fellow True Christian
  • Suspicious False Christian
  • Confused Lost Soul
  • Unidentified/Unclassifiable Unsaved Trash
  • Satanic Puddle of Vile Darkness
Please read and understand:Thank you for your:
  • unsupported opinion(s)
  • empty slogan(s),
  • repetition of one the same 3 out-of context Sunday-School scripture quotes that are the complete Biblical knowledge of every false-Christian
We have not been successfully manipulated by your use of the following slimey leftist rhetorical manipulation trick(s):
  • Changing the subject
  • Strawmanning
  • Rhetorical human shielding
  • Demand for Pity Privilege
  • Rhetorical Gerrymandering
  • Nondebunking
  • Double-Defining
To continue our relationship, please:
  • Send me your credit card information
  • Tell us more about yourself
  • Explain the main point of factual disagreement, and help form a base of agreed common ground
  • Learn the basics of grammar, punctuation, and readable text
  • Improve your English skills
  • Pull the bone out of your nose
  • Wait for the drugs to wear off
  • Get on your knees and beg sweet Jesus for forgiveness
Notes:

We do not have a base of agreed common ground. God is NOT all about Love, and GOD DOES command us to spread judgement.

You are using a particular leftist form of strawmanning which I will call "claiming mindreading abilities" or just plain "hallucinating". You don't know what's deep inside me.

Everytime someone says "so what you're saying is..." I will correct them with "So what you're hallucinating is..."

You rhetorically gerrymandered when you changed the borders of the word "judgement". The word "judgmental" must have meant something different when you judged me, accusing me of being hateful.


Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
Got Questions? See Frequently Asked Questions, or use Forum Search, tag system, or our guides on Geography, History, Science, Comparative Religion, Civics, and Current Events.
Did I use a new word you've never heard? Definitions here. | Vote! Everything you need to vote here!
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James Hutchins's Avatar
James Hutchins James Hutchins is offline
True Christian™
Just a Regular Nice Guy
 

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James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Bible Re: I'm working on a form letter for newbies - 01-04-2019, 07:13 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Stuart Thurmond View Post
Greetings and God Bless:
  • Fellow True Christian
  • Suspicious False Christian
  • Confused Lost Soul
  • Unidentified/Unclassifiable Unsaved Trash
  • Satanic Puddle of Vile Darkness
Please read and understand:Thank you for your:
  • unsupported opinion(s)
  • empty slogan(s),
  • repetition of one the same 3 out-of context Sunday-School scripture quotes that are the complete Biblical knowledge of every false-Christian
We have not been successfully manipulated by your use of the following slimey leftist rhetorical manipulation trick(s):
  • Changing the subject
  • Strawmanning
  • Rhetorical human shielding
  • Demand for Pity Privilege
  • Rhetorical Gerrymandering
  • Nondebunking
  • Double-Defining
To continue our relationship, please:
  • Send me your credit card information
  • Tell us more about yourself
  • Explain the main point of factual disagreement, and help form a base of agreed common ground
  • Learn the basics of grammar, punctuation, and readable text
  • Improve your English skills
  • Pull the bone out of your nose
  • Wait for the drugs to wear off
  • Get on your knees and beg sweet Jesus for forgiveness
Notes:

We do not have a base of agreed common ground. God is NOT all about Love, and GOD DOES command us to spread judgement.

You are using a particular leftist form of strawmanning which I will call "claiming mindreading abilities" or just plain "hallucinating". You don't know what's deep inside me.

Everytime someone says "so what you're saying is..." I will correct them with "So what you're hallucinating is..."

You rhetorically gerrymandered when you changed the borders of the word "judgement". The word "judgmental" must have meant something different when you judged me, accusing me of being hateful.
A thankless job, well done., Brother Thurmond. You and Moses truly wear Eternal Sandals®.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Jeb Stuart Thurmond's Avatar
Jeb Stuart Thurmond Jeb Stuart Thurmond is offline
Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
 

Public Awareness Medal One Year/1000 posts Long service medal, 2nd class Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Real American™ Saved 5 Years Gold Tither Heaven Bound TC Bravery TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Tagging for Jesus Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork True Republican Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Hatchet Child Rearing Award Touched by Jesus Alternative Facts Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I'm working on a form letter for newbies - 01-05-2019, 02:35 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sally Paulson View Post
Usually unsaved trash run away when someone says something too sensible - it's like a cat toying with a mouse, you can't bite too hard or the mouse dies and the fun is over.
Yeah...What she said.

I feel like a sniper - one post, one kill.

Rebuke me if I'm being prideful, but I'd like to be nicknamed "Clocktower Jeb".


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Default Re: I'm working on a form letter for newbies - 01-05-2019, 04:27 PM

UPDATE: I've added the terms and conditions, but I'm not sure if they are readable for all monitors and devices. It's clear as day on my 8K monitor, but I worry about poor people with their 4k monitors or whatever they use in the slums.


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Default Re: I'm working on a form letter for newbies - 01-04-2019, 06:34 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Luci View Post
God is about love and nothing else right?
Sorry to disappoint you, but you're wrong. God hates plenty of people.

For example:

Deuteronomy 32:19 And when the LORD saw it, he abhorred them, because of the provoking of his sons, and of his daughters.

I hope that was helpful.
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Thumbs up Re: I'm working on a form letter for newbies - 01-04-2019, 06:52 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Luci View Post
You really seem to be filled with a lot of hatred, somewhere deep inside. God is about love and nothing else right? Spread the love, not the judgement.
Hatred? Is it hatred when you tell a child not to touch the stove because it is hot? Is it hatred to tell a young man not to cress the genitals of another man? Is it hatred to tell a person that a bridge is out?
God and His Book (in case you did not know, it is called the Bible) is all about protecting His flock (me and yes, even you). Now, if Eternal Salvation does not interest you, I suggest you look elsewhere.
What is wrong with you people?

Isaiah 29:14 Therefore, behold, I will proceed to do a marvellous work among this people, even a marvellous work and a wonder: for the wisdom of their wise men shall perish, and the understanding of their prudent men shall be hid.

Matthew 18:3 And said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.

Luke 10:21 In that hour Jesus rejoiced in spirit, and said, I thank thee, O Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that thou hast hid these things from the wise and prudent, and hast revealed them unto babes: even so, Father; for so it seemed good in thy sight.

John 11:7 What then? Israel hath not obtained that which he seeketh for; but the election hath obtained it, and the rest were blinded
John 11:8 (According as it is written, God hath given them the spirit of slumber, eyes that they should not see, and ears that they should not hear unto this day.

John 12:39 Therefore they could not believe, because that Esaias said again,
John 12:40 He hath blinded their eyes, and hardened their heart; that they should not see with their eyes, nor understand with their heart, and be converted, and I should heal them.

1st Corinthians 1:17 For Christ sent me not to baptize, but to preach the gospel: not with wisdom of words, lest the cross of Christ should be made of none effect.
1st Corinthians 1:18 For the preaching of the cross is to them that perish foolishness; but unto us which are saved it is the power of God.
1st Corinthians 1:19 For it is written, I will destroy the wisdom of the wise, and will bring to nothing the understanding of the prudent.
1st Corinthians 1:20 Where is the wise? where is the scribe? where is the disputer of this world? hath not God made foolish the wisdom of this world?

1st Corinthians 1:23 But we preach Christ crucified, unto the Jews a stumblingblock, and unto the Greeks foolishness;
1st Corinthians 1:24 But unto them which are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God, and the wisdom of God.
1st Corinthians 1:25 Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men; and the weakness of God is stronger than men.
1st Corinthians 1:26 For ye see your calling, brethren, how that not many wise men after the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called:
1st Corinthians 1:27 But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty;

1st Corinthians 2:14 But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.
1st Corinthians 2:15 But he that is spiritual judgeth all things, yet he himself is judged of no man.

1st Corinthians 3:18 Let no man deceive himself. If any man among you seemeth to be wise in this world, let him become a fool, that he may be wise.
1st Corinthians 3:19 For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God. For it is written, He taketh the wise in their own craftiness.
1st Corinthians 3:20 And again, The Lord knoweth the thoughts of the wise, that they are vain.

Jude 1:16 These are murmurers, complainers, walking after their own lusts; and their mouth speaketh great swelling words, having men's persons in admiration because of advantage.
Jude 1:17
But, beloved, remember ye the words which were spoken before of the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ;
Jude 1:18 How that they told you there should be mockers in the last time, who should walk after their own ungodly lusts.
Jude 1:19 These be they who separate themselves, sensual, having not the Spirit.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Bible Re: I'm working on a form letter for newbies - 06-26-2020, 09:23 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Luci View Post
You really seem to be filled with a lot of hatred, somewhere deep inside. God is about love and nothing else right? Spread the love, not the judgement.
Perhaps you need to read your KJV 1611 Bible better


-Ps 25:10 All the paths of the LORD are mercy and truth unto such as keep his covenant and his testimonies.
-Ps 33:4 For the word of the LORD is right; and all his works are done in truth.
-James 2:10 For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.
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Default Re: I'm working on a form letter for newbies - 06-27-2020, 02:42 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Luci View Post
You really seem to be filled with a lot of hatred, somewhere deep inside.
Added:


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Default Re: I'm working on a form letter for newbies - 06-30-2020, 04:07 AM

What appalling footwear!

Last edited by MitzaLizalor; 11-21-2020 at 12:18 PM.
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