[PhoenixOwl (On Moderation)]

Or so this article would have me believe.

So, to begin with, I suppose I should go through the list at the bottom and see which applies to me. The list is as follows (for those of you too lazy to click the link and read it there):

"Hop-scotch, doll playing, the wearing of wigs, the wearing of low socks, coordinated clothing or any pink or purple article of clothing, untrimmed fingernails, curious artistic or musical tendencies, a wild imagination, hair over the ears or collar or 'bowl cuts,' swaying or skipping, reading too much, insisting on keeping their bedroom door shut, a bouncing walk, lisping, crying or pouting, fear of heights, fear of swimming, fear of the dark, disinterest in sports, refusing to disrobe in the locker room or shower after gym class, asking too many questions about David & Jonathan, extending fingers during a yawn or while eating or drinking, winking, whispering, giggling, bowing, and being the last one picked for a team of any sort."

I have "curious" musical tendancies. An extreamely wild imagination is one of the qualities I love about myself. I alwas have my hair covering my ears. I read a lot. My bedroom door is always shut when I'm in it. I have a fear of heights. I dislike sports (with the exception of soccer, though I don't actually play or watch the sport being played). I [i]hated[i] undressing in the locker rooms. I whisper when required. I giggle from time to time. I'm never picked for sports at all, since I refuse to play (unless it's soccer).

So is that enough ticks against me? Suppose I'm a sissy. Now that that's done with, a few things hit a strong chord with me. I would like to answer the following questions:

1) Curious artistic or musical tendancies? So what, a guy can't be an artist? Or a musician? Where in the world would the logic for such an idea even come from? I weep. I truly do.

2) Since when does a wild imagination make you a sissy? I'd like to think it inspires creativity. But oh no, we can't have that, now can we? All us males gots to think inside the box. Anything outside business is strictly forbidden. This is serious business.

3) Reading? Reading? Give me a moment to calm my rage. Since when did reading become something that would make me a sissy? Oh dear. Oh dear oh dear oh dear.

4) The three fears mentioned... Hmm... a man can't be afraid anymore? I'm a fraid of heights for the obvious reason that, if I fall, SPLAT, no more me. I used to be afraid of the dark because I was afraid of the unknown. And one might be afraid of swimming because of a fear of drowning, no? So all add up to the biological fear of death and/or pain. Only sissys fear that. Why is that?

There were others that angered me, but those four are the main ones. I'm done my rant.

[eliot mayfield]

God guided you here to be saved. This may be your only chance to keep from burning in Hell. Are you going to take it?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

You are a sissy, and loud-mouthed one at that. I really recommend Jesus to cure you of being a foul-mouthed, yapping sissy fag. He can make you normal again, and you'll thank Him for the rest of your life.

Don't come in to God's favorite forum throwing a queer hissy fit about your crappy life, ok? As Brother Eliot says, Jesus has called you here for a reason. Don't blow it, the way you blow everything else.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Originally Posted by PhoenixOwl

I'm a fraid of heights for the obvious reason that, if I fall, SPLAT, no more me.

You're almost right. If you fall, SPLAT, no more chance to repent, and then it's eternal damnation for you.

Would you like to avoid that fate? I knew you would. Repent of your girly-boy ways, read the KJV, and hit the PayPal button at the bottom of this page. It may sound harsh now, but if you become saved, then you'll thank us when we meet again in Heaven.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Eternal salvation is no hoax, our little sodomite friend. God has a plan for you, and swishing around "I am retardeding" yourself (I shudder to think of what that entails) isn't part of it. There is only one thing you should be doing on your knees - praying to Jesus to deliver you from sin.

[Ahimaaz Smith]

Originally Posted by PhoenixOwl

Reading? Reading? Give me a moment to calm my rage. Since when did reading become something that would make me a sissy? Oh dear. Oh dear oh dear oh dear.

You're confusing the symptoms for the disease. Nobody said that reading makes you a sissy. It's being a sissy that makes you read so much. Anyway, reading per se isn't the issue, it's just reading books other than the KJV1611 Bible and a few selected Christian-oriented works penned by authors who are filled with the Spirit of God.

Anyway, forget the reading and the music and the long hair. Saying "oh dear" means you've gone WAY beyond mere sissyhood. Phoenix, you should head over to Sister Betty Bower's BASH ministry website, http://bettybowers.com/bash.html, immediately.

Yours in Christ,

Ahimaaz

P.S. If you're having issues controlling your rage, you might want to try practicing some cheek turning. And no, you homo, I don't mean THOSE cheeks.

[Captain_American (On Moderation)]

Originally Posted by PhoenixOwl

Or so this article would have me believe.

So, to begin with, I suppose I should go through the list at the bottom and see which applies to me. The list is as follows (for those of you too lazy to click the link and read it there):

"Hop-scotch, doll playing, the wearing of wigs, the wearing of low socks, coordinated clothing or any pink or purple article of clothing, untrimmed fingernails, curious artistic or musical tendencies, a wild imagination, hair over the ears or collar or 'bowl cuts,' swaying or skipping, reading too much, insisting on keeping their bedroom door shut, a bouncing walk, lisping, crying or pouting, fear of heights, fear of swimming, fear of the dark, disinterest in sports, refusing to disrobe in the locker room or shower after gym class, asking too many questions about David & Jonathan, extending fingers during a yawn or while eating or drinking, winking, whispering, giggling, bowing, and being the last one picked for a team of any sort."

I have "curious" musical tendancies. An extreamely wild imagination is one of the qualities I love about myself. I alwas have my hair covering my ears. I read a lot. My bedroom door is always shut when I'm in it. I have a fear of heights. I dislike sports (with the exception of soccer, though I don't actually play or watch the sport being played). I [i]hated[i] undressing in the locker rooms. I whisper when required. I giggle from time to time. I'm never picked for sports at all, since I refuse to play (unless it's soccer).

So is that enough ticks against me? Suppose I'm a sissy. Now that that's done with, a few things hit a strong chord with me. I would like to answer the following questions:

1) Curious artistic or musical tendancies? So what, a guy can't be an artist? Or a musician? Where in the world would the logic for such an idea even come from? I weep. I truly do.

2) Since when does a wild imagination make you a sissy? I'd like to think it inspires creativity. But oh no, we can't have that, now can we? All us males gots to think inside the box. Anything outside business is strictly forbidden. This is serious business.

3) Reading? Reading? Give me a moment to calm my rage. Since when did reading become something that would make me a sissy? Oh dear. Oh dear oh dear oh dear.

4) The three fears mentioned... Hmm... a man can't be afraid anymore? I'm a fraid of heights for the obvious reason that, if I fall, SPLAT, no more me. I used to be afraid of the dark because I was afraid of the unknown. And one might be afraid of swimming because of a fear of drowning, no? So all add up to the biological fear of death and/or pain. Only sissys fear that. Why is that?

There were others that angered me, but those four are the main ones. I'm done my rant.

As much as I dislike insulting people, you do show tendencies of being a sissy. A manly man would reply as follows:

1: I HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE AN ARTIST IF I WANT YOU FASCIST piffleERS! YOU'RE DUMBpiffleS FOR EVEN TRYING TO CONDEMN THIS!

2: ONLY IDIOTS DON'T HAVE IMAGINATION. AND ALL OF YOU ARE COMPLETE IDIOTS!

3: NOT READING IS FOR DUMBASSES.

4: SH*T IS SCARY! LIKE BIG A** SPIDERS THOSE FREAK ME RIGHT THE piffle OUT!

If you did something like that, you would seem like much less of a sissy.

[TrollofDeath (On Moderation)]

Amen, Captain.

[Petal]

Originally Posted by Mr.TrollofDearth

Amen, Captain.

i not think he were prayin, Mr.Troll, but it real good you say 'amens', next time you posts you just gotta start wiv 'dear lord Jesus, i prays for forgivness for being a trolls an a pain in the butts', an then you says amens!

that you ---> <--- that be lord Jesus forgivin you

[your mother (On Moderation)]

You are a pussy. Grow some balls there chachi.

[Petal]

Originally Posted by your mother

You are a pussy. Grow some balls there chachi.

you not my momma, she never ever askeds me to grow bawls an be a herm-afro-dite wiv the big fuzzy hairs, so there!

[Sister Noddy]

Originally Posted by your mother

You are a pussy. Grow some balls there chachi.

Hey, you quit pickin on our dear True Christian™ Sister Petal, if you know what's good for yooooou, foul momma on moderation! So there!