Good News Brothers and Sisters in Christ!
Today it was announced that documents containing a mind-controlling concoction that is highly effective on 89% of African Americans, will be transported by armored car to a new location.
Source
Quote:
The secret's out at KFC. Well, sort of. Colonel Harland Sanders' handwritten recipe of 11 herbs and spices was to be removed Tuesday from safekeeping at KFC's corporate offices for the first time in decades.
|
This is an excellent opportunity my friends! Can you imagine the countless amount of nigras we could bring to Christ with the knowledge of this recipe?
Quote:
The biggest prize, though, is a single sheet of notebook paper, yellowed by age, that lays out the entire formula - including exact amounts for each ingredient - written in pencil and signed by Sanders.
|
I am suggesting to LBC that we use some of our funds to procure this recipe in the name of Christ. Everything has a price, and I assume that the security officers guarding the recipe do too!
After obtaining the document we can hold mandatory 32 hour sermons in order to get your serving of the Sanders chicken! People would be turning to Christ right and left! Praise!!
I imagine that we would get back all the funds we spent with all the new tithers joining the Church!
Or if we really wanted to we could just get rid of this greasy/unhealthy addicting food altogether! Our options are unlimited!