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HALLOWEEN = HELLOWEEN A seasonal forum to NOT celebrate Satan's birthday.

 
 
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Jesus Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-05-2016, 04:40 PM

I sent in a check a week ago and never heard back. I have assume the Church office is swamped with applications due to the recent influx of easy mooslime targets.
Will we be able to use mines this year? The little ones that have a hard time controlling a AR15. Ever seen a Black Pearlescent S500 riddled, it is not pretty and I only had 800 miles on it, I hope the Church was able to use it and I thank the office for the deed of transfers for tax purposes valuing it at $500K)

I am looking forward to a bountiful Witch hunt and while I hope to win the body count, I do wish you all luck. Remember, it is all for Jesus and the Republican way of life.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Default Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-05-2016, 06:07 PM

Last year, I tried to get fancy and used only bow and arrow. That was a complete failure. This year, I will be using the trusty HK .308. I am expecting excellent results and I expect to be a contender for the prize.


God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Default Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-05-2016, 07:00 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Hutchins View Post
I sent in a check a week ago and never heard back. I have assume the Church office is swamped with applications due to the recent influx of easy mooslime targets.
I know this is not the place to mention it, but can anyone tell me what is going on in the Church office? It was bad enough when that June woman took over from Cookie, but now there seems to be nobody there at all. I'd call the office and ask, but all calls go straight to voicemail.


Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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Cool Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-07-2016, 08:51 AM

I don't know why you're all preparing for something that isn't going to happen. The Court is preparing an injunction to stop the hunt and yet you are all blindly just sending your money and expecting things to go on.


Tell me what group of people lives their lives preparing and expecting an event so ludicrous? What group just blindly follows whatever someone says and ignores the evidence to the contrary?


I'm reminded of my neighbor's children who kept expecting their father to come back after he died. People told these kids that if they did everything their mom told them to, he would come for them one day. So what do these kids do? They go to temple on the Sabbath, they do everything mother says, they accept empty promises and believe it will happen just because mom wants to control their behavior. Mom threatens to give them punishments if they don't do everything they're told, even saying when dad comes back he'll be very angry and send them away forever.


The guy died, for pete's sake.


What some people won't do for control. But I digress. Stop wasting your time planning. Go for a walk. Get out of Freehold for a weekend or a week. See how the real world lives.


M. Hezekiah, Esq.
Atty at Law


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Default Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-07-2016, 07:45 PM

I've ordered a GoPro just for this year's witch hunt. Might make a little documentation out of it.
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Default Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-09-2016, 06:03 AM

My best to all who partake in this event. As usual, circumstances have barred me from personal participation, but I will be with you all in prayer. Because we all know that prayer is real and effective, I, too, will be storing up treasure in Heaven for this Godly Work.

In an effort to offer some practical assistance, I do wish to point out that the Devil's Concubines are starting ever younger.







Pray and take careful aim, True Christians™. This one has a very knowing gleam in her eyes.


Discerningly Yours,


Handmaiden


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Default Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-12-2016, 03:45 AM

I have bagged almost half of this group of filthy witches. I used explosives this year, as God has no restriction on the means of riddance of the vermin.


Exodus 22:18 "Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live."


I trust that I have finally won the tournament? I think if I do not win I have been robbed and it has been rigged to keep me from my deserved title?


Only losers and tremendous liars could keep me from my title. The overwhelming and many, many people that agree with me.. and they are worth many billions of dollars... and they said that I caught the MOST witches, and with such outstanding skill. They could have.. they said that I was the most aggressive and best man they ever met.


Bill Clinton could NEVER have bagged so many witches.


Vote for BHP, or you are a total loser.




Name:  New Witches.jpg
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Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."

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Default Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-12-2016, 04:45 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Harold Porter View Post
I have bagged almost half of this group of filthy witches. I used explosives this year, as God has no restriction on the means of riddance of the vermin.

Exodus 22:18 "Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live."

I trust that I have finally won the tournament? I think if I do not win I have been robbed and it has been rigged to keep me from my deserved title?

Only losers and tremendous liars could keep me from my title. The overwhelming and many, many people that agree with me.. and they are worth many billions of dollars... and they said that I caught the MOST witches, and with such outstanding skill. They could have.. they said that I was the most aggressive and best man they ever met.

Bill Clinton could NEVER have bagged so many witches.

Vote for BHP, or you are a total loser.
Not too bad, but you've got no chance. I'll win this year, again!



And that is just a start! Cranky is also well ahead of you!


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-14-2016, 03:10 PM

From the Office of the State Attorney General

To all for whom come these presents: GREETING:

The State of Iowa has declared an injunction against the 2016 Witch Hunt as announced by the Landover Baptist Church, Freehold Iowa. No person or persons shall be permitted to conduct any such "hunt" now nor in the future without the express ruling of the Supreme Court of the State of Iowa. All shall be prosecuted who violate this injuction.

As Attorney General's Representative:

Andrea Jobblestein-Mahovak
Atty. at Law
In Des Moines, Iowa, this 10th day of October, 2016


A half truth is a whole lie.
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Default Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-14-2016, 03:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Hezekiah Esq View Post
From the Office of the State Attorney General

To all for whom come these presents: GREETING:

The State of Iowa has declared an injunction against the 2016 Witch Hunt as announced by the Landover Baptist Church, Freehold Iowa. No person or persons shall be permitted to conduct any such "hunt" now nor in the future without the express ruling of the Supreme Court of the State of Iowa. All shall be prosecuted who violate this injuction.

As Attorney General's Representative:

Andrea Jobblestein-Mahovak
Atty. at Law
In Des Moines, Iowa, this 10th day of October, 2016

The LORD has established His throne in the heavens, And His sovereignty rules over all.- Psalm 103:19. It is God who rules the heavens and the Earth. Your case is dismissed, Mr. Hezekiah.


God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Default Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-14-2016, 04:20 PM

I am trying to meet new people in my area would you want to witch hunt with me?
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Default Re: 2016 Witch Hunt! - 10-14-2016, 04:42 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Hezekiah Esq View Post
From the Office of the State Attorney General

To all for whom come these presents: GREETING:

The State of Iowa has declared an injunction against the 2016 Witch Hunt as announced by the Landover Baptist Church, Freehold Iowa. No person or persons shall be permitted to conduct any such "hunt" now nor in the future without the express ruling of the Supreme Court of the State of Iowa. All shall be prosecuted who violate this injuction.

As Attorney General's Representative:

Andrea Jobblestein-Mahovak
Atty. at Law
In Des Moines, Iowa, this 10th day of October, 2016

What witch hunt book did you pull that name from?

Lying lips are abomination to the Lord: but they that deal truly are his delight. Proverbs 12:22
 

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