[Samdum]

I just joined and wanted to say "Hi" to everyone.

Sam

[Samdum]

I am a pure Christian and I want to participate in every topic of the forum here that I have an insights.

[Didymus Much]

*yawn* Hi. Could you look at the top of the page and get back to us? Thanks.

[Isabella White]

Originally Posted by Samdum

I am a pure Christian and I want to participate in every topic of the forum here that I have an insights.

Dear Samdum: We are happy that you have found , in the midst of such a busy interwebs galaxy. We would love to fellowship with you, and to help you learn about the truths of the glorious Gospel, as contained within the pages of the .

However, it appears that you have overlooked our very basic requirements, which are posted at the top of this page. I shall include them here, for your benefit:

The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

I do thank you for your attention to these very important details, and may the bless you, as you follow — here, at .

[Johny Joe Hold]

Originally Posted by Samdum

I am a pure Christian and I want to participate in every topic of the forum here that I have an insights.

Welcome, please follow Sister Isabella's directions. I'll pass along a little hint to help you during your time here. "Insight" is found by either quoting the Bible or our Pastors. There is no other source of "insight."

[Cranky Old Man]

Welcome to God's favorite forum!

Originally Posted by Samdum

I have an insights

I am glad to hear that. Without insight, people keep bumping their heads against tree branches.

Can you tell us about your favorite Bible verse?

[James Hutchins]

Hi

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Please read the Pastor's Rules and Announcements. Pay attention to the "noobs" thread. Then go post your introduction on the introduction forum.
Thanks!

Failure to heed this warning will bring God's vengeance upon you!



I think you should read our syllabus for new posters as written by Pastor Billy-Reuben. It really explains all you need to know as far as our beliefs. It also outlines what is expected as far as your behavior on these forums.

Here are your rights as articulated by Dr. Enobarbus.

New members are requested to make an introduction for themselves.

We always encourage everyone to back up all claims with scripture from the Holy Bible.

Chances are the question you want to have answered has been asked before. I would be sure to use the search function before diving head first into people who are tired of hearing the same question over and over.




First of all, this is NOT a debate forum. We're right and you're wrong, according to Jesus and the Holy Word of God. Please read THIS thread before making an even bigger fool of yourself.

Secondly, while the internets might seem to be "free" to you, this particular corner of the internets is a privately owned Christian forum. The rights you have on this forum are listed HERE. Please contact a Pastor immediately if you feel that any of your rights have been violated.

Finally, your unsaved opinions or tantrums are not even slightly of interest to us. We follow the Holy Word of God TO THE LETTER, and make no apologies for that. One of the most important commandments in the Bible tells us to avoid unsaved scum such as yourself. You wandered in here uninvited, and unwelcome .

If you want to debate people, THIS is the place to go.

Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.

I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.

[Basilissa]

Originally Posted by Samdum

I am a pure Christian and I want to participate in every topic of the forum here that I have an insights.

Thank you for making it clear that you are not an artificial intelligence - an AI bot would have a somewhat better grasp of grammar rules.


A cautious

[MitzaLizalor]

Originally Posted by Samdum

I want to participate in every topic of the forum here that I have an insights

What is "insights" ?

[Isabella White]

Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor

What is "insights" ?

Oh, I am afraid that we may never know the answer to that question, dear Sister Mitza. After all of the warm, cordial greetings that were given to Mr. Sandum by the servants of the — here, at — it appears, rather unfortunately, that our new friend has decided to make his presence scarce. It is as though he has vanished — vamoosed — into Who knows where?

I shall continue to pray for Mr. Sandum, however; and his name is at the top of my prayer list for today's McGill Street Ladies' Wednesday Afternoon Bible Study, Prayer Meeting and Tea & Social. May Almighty bring him back to us, for study of the glorious .

[MitzaLizalor]

Prayer is a powerful tool. Perhaps our visitor was about to pray for forgiveness so Satan stepped in with a distraction.

[Isabella White]

Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor

Prayer is a powerful tool. Perhaps our visitor was about to pray for forgiveness so Satan stepped in with a distraction.

Oh, I would not be surprised by Satan's interference, dear Sister Mitza — not in the slightest! I had wondered if Mr. Sandum's presence here had angered the devil, causing demons to intervene and to pull our new friend from us.

Most assuredly, I hope that that is not the case, but I do not have a good feeling about this. Why, if Mr. Sandum is being controlled by Satan, then he will find himself engaged in horrific demonic activity — against his will — and who knows what will happen then. He could very well end up being abducted to a carnival in some far-away land, where he will be demonically-forced to do the accursed, dreaded, gypsy hoochie-koochie dance!

[James Hutchins]

I do not get it.
These people are like wetbacks in a low rider, doing drive by posting and they seem to think that is all it will take to be in the Good Graces™ of God.
I blame public schools.

[MitzaLizalor]

Originally Posted by James Hutchins

I blame public schools.

That – and early fusion of cranial sutures.

Jesus overcomes all obstacles, whether demons have attached themselves or not, whether there is disease or not, even loathsome afflictions are no impediment for Him as is attested throughout The New Testament and across history (insofar as it's accurate, which rules out material conflicting with The Old Testament) and my prayers are with Samdum because, in part, I really want to hear insights wherever they're available – whether I agree with them or not.

The alternative is unpleasant. Hell. Forever. Unless what one hears, however unexpected, contains the message of Truth and the opportunity for Redemption from torture, over and over again.

[WWWM]

I am a moronㅤㅤ

[MitzaLizalor]

Originally Posted by WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWM

I am a moronㅤ

We know.