General Church Fellowship A place for True Christians to join in praise, faith and fellowship. |
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South of the Border outreach program True Christian™
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Posts: 13,156
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Godly Midwest
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Re: Donald Tump VICTORY party tomorrow at Pastor Zeke's house! -
11-09-2016, 02:16 PM
That was a really great party! I wish I could remember more of it.
Unfortunately, since I woke up this morning, I have a terrible headache and a funny taste in my mouth.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Donald Tump VICTORY party tomorrow at Pastor Zeke's house! -
11-09-2016, 03:11 PM
Mr. Mayor, it's time to send Donald the invoice for our advisory services and don't hesitate to make it a 7-figure total
Quote:
Originally Posted by Basilissa
Unfortunately, since I woke up this morning, I have a terrible headache and a funny taste in my mouth.
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Any stains that you may find on your garmets that are fluorescent with the ultraviolet light are purely coincidental. I can assure you that my houseboys are well-trained and did not trespass at all when the glorious Joy of Jesus overwhelmed quite a few of us during the celebrations.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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South of the Border outreach program True Christian™
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Posts: 13,156
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Godly Midwest
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Re: Donald Tump VICTORY party tomorrow at Pastor Zeke's house! -
11-09-2016, 06:48 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
Any stains that you may find on your garmets that are fluorescent with the ultraviolet light are purely coincidental. I can assure you that my houseboys are well-trained and did not trespass at all when the glorious Joy of Jesus overwhelmed quite a few of us during the celebrations.
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Of course, Pastor.
Speaking of which, can someone tell me where are my clothes? I've located most of the garments I was wearing last night, but there are a few items still missing.
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True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
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Posts: 8,775
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Surrounded by heathens
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Re: Donald Tump VICTORY party tomorrow at Pastor Zeke's house! -
11-09-2016, 07:04 PM
Sister Basilissa, have you asked FaithMachine? Rumor has it that he has quite the collection!
Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 21
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: God's Favorite Country™
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Re: Donald Tump VICTORY party tomorrow at Pastor Zeke's house! -
11-09-2016, 11:31 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
Mr. Mayor, it's time to send Donald the invoice for our advisory services and don't hesitate to make it a 7-figure total
Any stains that you may find on your garmets that are fluorescent with the ultraviolet light are purely coincidental. I can assure you that my houseboys are well-trained and did not trespass at all when the glorious Joy of Jesus overwhelmed quite a few of us during the celebrations.
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Pastor Zeke! It's so nice to see you - where have you been these past few months? I was worried that Hillary Clinton had assassinated you in order to silence you, or that you had been kidnapped by the liberal media or George Soros.
I'm glad none of that happened. I saw a few threads saying something about how you were fighting some monsters (my memory's not great, please correct me if I'm wrong) and you were fighting them with the Holy Bible. Or maybe they were demons. Anyway I'm glad to see that you're still here on Earth to share your wise voice.
Sadly since I am a new member I am still considered unsaved trash, so I doubt I will be able to attend the party at your house. I'll still hold a party at my own house though.
Leviticus 19:19
"Ye shall keep my statutes. Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind: thou shalt not sow thy field with mingled seed: neither shall a garment mingled of linen and woollen come upon thee."
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Another brick in Donald´s wall - A.K.A "The Gonz" True Christian™
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Posts: 2,111
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ungodly South America
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Re: Donald Tump VICTORY party tomorrow at Pastor Zeke's house! -
11-10-2016, 12:39 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Engles
Sadly since I am a new member I am still considered unsaved trash, so I doubt I will be able to attend the party at your house. I'll still hold a party at my own house though.
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Brother Engles, I think I have a way for you to shorten your stay as unsaved trash. It is true that the department of faith will be doing an extensive reasearch on you, your family, close friends and pastor; this will include but not be limited to religious, financial and criminal records. And this takes time. Sometimes a lot.
But you also have to prove that you are really a Christian. As we are short of volunteers for building the Godly wall in the border, I suggest you to be tomorrow 9AM (sharp) and start working on this. I asume you are a young male, and capable of working. There are many duties here, so please don't be late.
2 more things in the way: if you happen to see some crazy rastafarian nigro, please bring it with you. He is skipping his duties and I am afraid I'll have to report him.
And please stop by a minimarket and grab some Buds for me. All the Tecate is making me ill.
On Topic: what a great party you seem to have had. I hope is only the beginning of an era.
PS: Engles, when you reach the border, I am the only hispanic there with a shotgun. That way you can identify me easily.
1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 823
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: America: God's favorite nation
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Re: Donald Tump VICTORY party tomorrow at Pastor Zeke's house! -
11-10-2016, 02:12 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Harold Porter
Why has the election not been called? Trump has 150 electorial collegiate votes, to the witch's 122?
This should have been put to bed hours ago. Stock futures are only down 500 points because there is a slight chance that crooked Hillary could win.
And I have not sold any t-shirts yet.
In Christ
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Amen! Now that Trump has definitively won, the stocks are at near record highs before Trump has even gotten into office! http://vesselnews.io/dow-jumps-300-p...igh-trump-win/
The horror even the slight possibility of a Hillary Clinton presidency must have been what sent them plummeting down.
Close minded people are just right people who don't want to spend time arguing.
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Forum Member
Forum Member
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Posts: 386
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Geographical center of the Bible belt
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Re: Donald Tump VICTORY party tomorrow at Pastor Zeke's house! -
11-10-2016, 09:03 PM
Yes sir, Trump is the real deal, he is so concerned about national security that on election night he was inquiring if he could get the nuclear launch codes right away instead of waiting a couple of months until inauguration. Anybody that concerned about protecting our Godly country has my vote!
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,984
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
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Re: Donald Tump VICTORY party tomorrow at Pastor Zeke's house! -
11-12-2016, 10:01 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey
Sister Basilissa, have you asked FaithMachine? Rumor has it that he has quite the collection!
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I believe there is some sort of misunderstanding, my dear sister in Christ, as the only clothes I own are men's clothes.
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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Possibly retarded pothead
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Posts: 1,003
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Here in Babylon
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Re: Donald Tump VICTORY party tomorrow at Pastor Zeke's house! -
11-13-2016, 01:13 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Gonzalez
2 more things in the way: if you happen to see some crazy rastafarian nigro, please bring it with you. He is skipping his duties and I am afraid I'll have to report him.
And please stop by a minimarket and grab some Buds for me.
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I am afraid that I will have to take umbrage with that comment. I have the duties of a Black man which are many and varied and you have the duties of a Mexican which are few. Building the wall is the work of Mexicans. The work of a Black man is to supervise the work of his woman and to think great thoughts.
And you can forget about the buds. I am keeping them all for myself.
Sing unto God, sing praises to his name: Extol him that rideth upon the heavens By his name JAH, and rejoice before him.-Psalms 68:4
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Another brick in Donald´s wall - A.K.A "The Gonz" True Christian™
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Posts: 2,111
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ungodly South America
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Re: Donald Tump VICTORY party tomorrow at Pastor Zeke's house! -
11-13-2016, 01:48 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by I Man Rastafari
I am afraid that I will have to take umbrage with that comment. I have the duties of a Black man which are many and varied and you have the duties of a Mexican which are few. Building the wall is the work of Mexicans. The work of a Black man is to supervise the work of his woman and to think great thoughts.
And you can forget about the buds. I am keeping them all for myself.
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I know that black men are useless for hard work unless they are enslaved.
But maybe if we invent a game, like giving you 2 points every time you put a brick on the wall, you will be building walls in a minute, and celebrating with high fives and so.
1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
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