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The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

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JustAGuyOnEarth JustAGuyOnEarth is offline
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Watermelon Introducing: Somebody? - 12-16-2019, 04:27 AM

So, hi. Let me get right to the point. You people won't know anything important about me. I go to different churches, all baptist. I don't have a favorite bible verse. I found Jesus because my parents would beat me if I didn't believe in him.
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Default Re: Introducing: Somebody? - 12-16-2019, 04:41 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JustAGuyOnEarth View Post
You people won't know anything important about me.
We've gotten used to people who write a lot yet never say anything important. At least you're upfront about it.

As for Bible verses, let's start with Galatians 5:16 . Good, better, best?


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Default Re: Introducing: Somebody? - 12-16-2019, 01:52 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JustAGuyOnEarth View Post
I don't have a favorite bible verse. I found Jesus because my parents would beat me if I didn't believe in him.
My father beat me when I didn't do things he and Jesus wanted too. You're in the right club. Welcome.


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Default Re: Introducing: Somebody? - 12-16-2019, 02:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JustAGuyOnEarth View Post
So, hi. Let me get right to the point. You people won't know anything important about me. I go to different churches, all baptist. I don't have a favorite bible verse. I found Jesus because my parents would beat me if I didn't believe in him.
Dear Miss Just: to : . I can't tell you how pleased we are to have you with us in our blessed corner of the interwebs. I can see that you are somewhat hesitant to say too much, but, please, Dear, don't be shy. We are a friendly group here, and we would love to get to know you. Please feel free to post regularly, and should you need advice on anything, please do not hesitate to reach out to us. We have the most wonderful men of serving as our pastors here, and our followers of the would be only too thrilled and delighted to help you with your daily walk with the .

May bless you richly, Dear.

Sincerely, Isabella W.




(Mrs.) Isabella White

Hebrews 10:19 "Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the of "
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Default Re: Introducing: Somebody? - 12-16-2019, 03:58 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JustAGuyOnEarth View Post
So, hi. Let me get right to the point. You people won't know anything important about me. I go to different churches, all baptist. I don't have a favorite bible verse. I found Jesus because my parents would beat me if I didn't believe in him.
Oh, but we already know the most important thing about you--You found Jesus.
Congratulations to you for finding your Most Significant Other, ever.


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
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Default Re: Introducing: Somebody? - 12-16-2019, 05:08 PM

Your parents didn't beat you enough apparently, or you would show respect for the rules of God's Favorite Forum. Beating children to within an inch of their lives saves them from eternal damnation, says the LORD (Proverbs 19:18; Proverbs 23:13). It also saves them from the Gay Lifestyle.



Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: Introducing: Somebody? - 12-16-2019, 05:20 PM

You didn't give me your preferred person pronouns, or mention if you have any triggers. Have you been living under a rock?

Introducing: Nobody.


Trigger Warning: the text you have just read may have caused: flashbacks to historical oppression, normalization of whiteness, hegemonic hyper-masculinity (if I must say so myself), assumption of genders, species, and/or status as a living being, other problematic sins which are yet to be discovered and outlawed but I should still be (eventually) punished for.

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Default Re: Introducing: Somebody? - 12-16-2019, 06:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JustAGuyOnEarth View Post
So, hi. Let me get right to the point. You people won't know anything important about me. I go to different churches, all baptist. I don't have a favorite bible verse. I found Jesus because my parents would beat me if I didn't believe in him.
I have to ask. What did you do for your parents to have to resort to beating you up to get you to believe in Jesus? Were you interested in being a fag? Were you watching Glee in secret? These are all very important questions so that the elders at Landover Baptist Church can get to know HOW you found Jesus. Please remember to be honest, as God knows when you’re lying and the punishment for such is harsh yet just.


My name is Maxine Levantine. I am 17 and follow the KJV Bible to a T. If you are wanting to hit on me you can turn away. THIS is reserved for Jesus and my future husband (whoever that may be).
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Default Re: Introducing: Somebody? - 12-16-2019, 09:31 PM

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Originally Posted by Social Construct View Post
You didn't give me your preferred person pronouns, or mention if you have any triggers.
Didn't even acknowledge that he's standing on stolen Celtic land. Tsk Tsk.
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Default Re: Introducing: Somebody? - 12-18-2019, 05:14 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JustAGuyOnEarth
So, hi. Let me get right to the point. You people won't know anything important about me. I go to different churches, all baptist. I don't have a favorite Bible verse. I found Jesus because my parents would beat me if I didn't believe in him. B)
Do you read The Bible? Not all verses are equally interesting all the time, but they're all equally important; otherwise God would not have included them. Sometimes, although it's important to know how many Israelites left Egypt (an exact number is not specified) or whether Eve had any daughters (yes) reading through a list seems less interesting than understanding how terrible astrology is. God will destroy everyone who obsesses over the stars and planets, a gateway to tarot cards and witchcraft which are utterly repugnant to God.
Zephaniah 1:2-6 I will utterly consume all things from off the land, saith the LORD. I will consume man and beast; I will consume the fowls of the heaven, and the fishes of the sea, and the stumblingblocks with the wicked; and I will cut off man from off the land, saith the LORD. I will also stretch out mine hand upon Judah, and upon all the inhabitants of Jerusalem; and I will cut off the remnant of Baal from this place, and the name of the Chemarims with the priests; and them that worship the host of heaven upon the housetops; and them that worship and that swear by the LORD, and that swear by Malcham; and them that are turned back from the LORD; and those that have not sought the LORD, nor enquired for him.
Reading that makes you want to find out what happened next! We do need to know the other things so that we have an answer for critics, none of whom appreciate how important The Bible is for Salvation. Without it they don't even know what Jesus saves us from.

Welcome to the forum.
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Messican Re: Introducing: Somebody? - 12-21-2019, 03:42 PM

Hi


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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