HOME WELCOME! FORUMS Register FAQ Calendar Mark Forums Read
Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > General Church Fellowship > The Poetaster's Korner
Reload this Page JESUS IS ERECT
The Poetaster's Korner Tasteful poetry for JESUS but don't let the flowers fool you. NO HOMERS ALLOWED!

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
BrotherLarry's Avatar
BrotherLarry BrotherLarry is offline
Revelationary Equine Gnathologist for Christ
True Christian™

Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian™ Ready for the Rapture Porn Resistant Persecuted One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Ex-Masturbator Friend of Jesus Gnathologist Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Stamp of Approval Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork TC Bravery True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Touched by Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Ex-Mary Worshipper Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Super Soaker Baptism Award Pastor Ezekiel Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud Team Fortress Denier

 
Posts: 2,264
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Wherever He Willeth.
BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Jesus JESUS IS ERECT - 04-21-2019, 05:43 PM
The LORD GOD inspired Sister Dana to ask me about writing a song after my earlier post in the Easter thread. After spending 30 seconds in prayer, this masterpiece came to me like in a dream or a vision.


I dedicate it to Sister Dana and of course, the LORD JESUS.


JESUS IS ERECT
by BrotherLarry with inspiration from GOD


1. Well, the women they went to the tomb
They were filled with dread and gloom
The angels asked why they felt the need to cry
Because no one else was in the room of the tomb
Then Jesus Himself said Hello
There's no need to weep and moan, I say so
Cause I am erect, you I'll never neglect
Now dry those eyes and you go


CHORUS:
Tell everyone I am erect!
Yes Jesus who died, and who never ever lied
Is out of the tomb, that was filled with such gloom
Tell everyone I am erect!
He is erect! He is erect! My Jesus was dead but He's erect!
He is erect! He is erect! My Jesus was dead but He's erect!


2. Now the devil doesn't want you to know
That Jesus is no longer laying low
He stood up on His Feet, the devil to beat
And that is why He wants you to go!
Don't sit there in misery and woe
Get up like He did, and GO
Don't waste all your time on funeral rhymes
Get up and get busy and GO


(REPEAT CHORUS)

Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
Dennis Lukes's Avatar
Dennis Lukes Dennis Lukes is online now
Innkeeper for Christ
True Christian™

Friend of Jesus Protected by JESUS Wall of Jesus True Christian™ Christian Love Ex-Masturbator Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Inn Keeper for Christ Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars QAnon Storm Chaser TC Bravery Stamp of Approval Outreach preacher Wrath of God Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Anti-Biden Midget porn survivor

 
Posts: 2,589
Join Date: Dec 2018
Location: Owning the Libs
Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Jesus Re: JESUS IS ERECT - 04-21-2019, 08:40 PM
Jesus had such a magnificent erection, coming back from the dead like that. Truly a rock-solid MIRACLE that the atheists can't explain away. That's why His righteous erection frightens them so much, because it spits all over Darwin's face. It's songs like this that are really arousing because they arouse your thoughts about God and His glory, unlike secular trash. Lovely application of Psalm 105:2, Brother Larry. Praise Jesus!

Based and Christpilled

† Titus 1:10-16†
"For there are many unruly and vain talkers and deceivers, specially they of the circumcision: Whose mouths must be stopped, who subvert whole houses, teaching things which they ought not, for filthy lucre's sake ... Wherefore rebuke them sharply, that they may be sound in the faith; Not giving heed to Jewish fables, and commandments of men, that turn from the truth ... Unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled. They profess that they know God; but in works they deny him, being abominable, and disobedient, and unto every good work reprobate."

The Goyim know. We know who killed Jesus (John 5:16, John 18:39-40, Matthew 27:25)
Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
Dana723's Avatar
Dana723 Dana723 is offline
Forum member
Forum Member

Protected by JESUS Cleanest Kitchen True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Pro-Life Kirk Cameron Fan Club Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus

 
Posts: 781
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: The greatest country in the world - United States!
Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: JESUS IS ERECT - 04-21-2019, 10:47 PM
Simply beautiful, Brother Larry. My sons are learning the words as I type this. They just can't help but laugh with joy over his erection!

Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered?
1 Corinthians 11:13
Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
Esther B. Esther B. is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member

Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture

 
Posts: 577
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Under the watchful eye of my husband
Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: JESUS IS ERECT - 04-21-2019, 11:05 PM
Amazing, Brother Larry! This one is my favorite so far!

And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
Deuteronomy 6.5
Reply With Quote
(#5)
Old
BibleReader2231's Avatar
BibleReader2231 BibleReader2231 is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member

Heaven Bound True Christian Beauty Virgin Most Obedient Pro-Life Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus

 
Posts: 571
Join Date: Jul 2018
Location: USA #MAGA
BibleReader2231 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBibleReader2231 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBibleReader2231 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBibleReader2231 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBibleReader2231 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBibleReader2231 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBibleReader2231 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBibleReader2231 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBibleReader2231 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBibleReader2231 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBibleReader2231 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: JESUS IS ERECT - 04-21-2019, 11:23 PM
Poetry such as this about Jesus just tickles me inside with glee. Why is that? Is it because Jesus himself is so large and conducts me with such...magnitude? I may have to sit down for this one. Thank you for sharing this with me Brother Larry. You’ve made this girl smile ear to ear this Easter.

My name is Maxine Levantine. I am 17 and follow the KJV Bible to a T. If you are wanting to hit on me you can turn away. THIS is reserved for Jesus and my future husband (whoever that may be).
Reply With Quote
(#6)
Old
#DEVILFORPRESIDENT #DEVILFORPRESIDENT is offline
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
  
Posts: 2
Join Date: Nov 2021
Location: in your mum
#DEVILFORPRESIDENT is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: JESUS IS ERECT - 11-08-2021, 04:01 AM
You're a pervert
Reply With Quote
(#7)
Old
Didymus Much's Avatar
Didymus Much Didymus Much is offline
Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
 

Hellbound Heathen Atheist Cancer on Society hippie Caution - Poster is Crazy Evilution Perv Baggie Condemned Reaper Evil Grammar Nazi Democrat Commmmmunnissss How dumb can you get? Five years in the service of the Enemy Beastiality Barney Caution - Poster is on Drugs Demonized Bleeding heart liebral Glutton Drunk Devil Rides the Short Bus Fiddler Potty mouth Retard Posting Philistine skull Pot Head Swiss Skull Sinner Devil's Trill Sonata Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Mower Pastor Ezekiel Prize for Unprecedented Retards Marxist Fake Polling The AIDS Confused about midget porn

 
Posts: 14,193
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The other end of the internet
Didymus Much is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Didymus Much is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Didymus Much is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Didymus Much is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Didymus Much is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Didymus Much is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Didymus Much is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Didymus Much is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Didymus Much is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Didymus Much is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Didymus Much is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: JESUS IS ERECT - 11-08-2021, 04:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by #DEVILFORPRESIDENT View Post
You're a pervert
Protip: aim your insults. Who, exactly, are you accusing of preversion?


if it's me, nvm, fair cop

Reply With Quote
(#8)
Old
WWJDnow's Avatar
WWJDnow WWJDnow is online now
True Christian™
True Christian™

True Christian™ Christian Love 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Mission to Australia Saved 1 Year Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once One Year/1000 posts Porn Resistant Pro-Life Bronze Tither Eats the Most Pork Super Soaker Baptism Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus 2015 Witch Hunt Award Trump of GOD Asked questions later Persecuted Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Stamp of Approval Hands Off BFF of Jesus Polling for Christ Anti-Biden WWJD

 
Posts: 6,311
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Godless New York City
WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: JESUS IS ERECT - 01-05-2022, 12:07 AM
The Lord is risen indeed.... Luke 24:34

Donald Trump / Kanye West
2024
I'm with the genius and the jigaboo.
Reply With Quote
(#9)
Old
Dennis Lukes's Avatar
Dennis Lukes Dennis Lukes is online now
Innkeeper for Christ
True Christian™

Friend of Jesus Protected by JESUS Wall of Jesus True Christian™ Christian Love Ex-Masturbator Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Inn Keeper for Christ Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars QAnon Storm Chaser TC Bravery Stamp of Approval Outreach preacher Wrath of God Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Anti-Biden Midget porn survivor

 
Posts: 2,589
Join Date: Dec 2018
Location: Owning the Libs
Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dennis Lukes will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: JESUS IS ERECT - 01-05-2022, 12:35 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by WWJDnow View Post
The Lord is risen indeed.... Luke 24:34
Glory! Truly Simon was blessed to have had the privilege of laying eyes on Christ's erection.

Based and Christpilled

† Titus 1:10-16†
"For there are many unruly and vain talkers and deceivers, specially they of the circumcision: Whose mouths must be stopped, who subvert whole houses, teaching things which they ought not, for filthy lucre's sake ... Wherefore rebuke them sharply, that they may be sound in the faith; Not giving heed to Jewish fables, and commandments of men, that turn from the truth ... Unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled. They profess that they know God; but in works they deny him, being abominable, and disobedient, and unto every good work reprobate."

The Goyim know. We know who killed Jesus (John 5:16, John 18:39-40, Matthew 27:25)
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

« Previous Thread | Next Thread »
Thread Tools
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2023, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved

Send an email to the Senior Pastor - Landover Baptist Church - Top