[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

The short review: With no sex or swearing, this is an excellent family film.

The long review: The premise of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre is that a group of hippie teenagers tresspass on a Texan family's property, with the obvious results. In Texas, it's legal to kill tresspassers, though I'm not sure about the legality of stuffing the wounded ones into your freezer. Basically there's no good guys in this tale. It's a story of a bad family and worse hippies.

Like all horror movies, the soon-to-be-dead characters are seen commiting the sins for which God will soon smite them. One is a vegetarian (she survives), another is an astrologer (to be killed, as commanded by Leviticus 20:27) and another I think is a Jew or something.

There is even an uppity cripple, who is brilliantly portrayed. He expects everybody to wheel him around everywhere, and has temper-tantrums when they don't. His rebellion against the place God put him is duly punished.

Afterwards I was surpised to find that the story isn't actually real. That's how realistic this movie is. It turns out it was based on the real life crimes of Ed Gein.

I wish the makers of this film had based it even more on Ed Gein, his story has lessons for us all. Specifically, it's an example of how single mothers and false-Christianity leads to sissydom, which leads to cross-dressing, which leads to murder and mutilation.

Originally Posted by wikipedia

With a slight growth over one eye and an effeminate demeanor, the younger Gein became a target for bullies.

As Focus On The Family has warned in this article, being a target of bullies is a sign of homosexuality.

Originally Posted by wikipedia

he did fairly well in school, particularly in reading.

The same article points out that "bright, precocious" boys are homos-in-the-making.

Originally Posted by wikipedia

Shortly after his mother's death, Gein had decided he wanted a sex change. He created a "woman suit" so he could pretend to be a female.

Cross-dresser, cannibal, same thing.

He could have been saved if he had recieved preaching from a True Christian man. However, the only Christian teaching he got was from a false-Christian woman:

Originally Posted by wikipedia

Augusta Gein, a fervent Lutheran, drummed into her boys the innate immorality of the world, the evil of drink, and the belief that all women (herself excluded) were prostitutes, and instruments of the devil. She reserved time every afternoon to read to them from the Bible, usually selecting graphic verses from the Old Testament dealing with death, murder, and divine retribution.

She didn't do a very good job of it. This is why the Bible says women are not to teach:

But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. - 1 Timothy 2:12

Got that, women? Don't try to teach your kids. Leave that to father, and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, which I give two thumbs up!

[Jenni111]

How different is the 1974 version from the 2003 remake?

[Don Bozo el Guapo]

Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond

I was surpised to find that the story isn't actually real. That's how realistic this movie is. It turns out it was based on the real life crimes of Ed Gein.

I wish the makers of this film had based it even more on Ed Gein, his story has lessons

All Right a topic with some meat[flayed] on its bones.Did you know Ed was also a role model for Silence of the Lambs and yours truly? Mehico has a host of Naughty Nun horror flics you would enjoy looking into. Hope this thread develops a huge following.

[Meek and Humble]

Originally Posted by Jenni111

How different is the 1974 version from the 2003 remake?

I wouldn't trust the 2003 version, it has the heathen porn star Jessica Biel in it

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher

I wouldn't trust the 2003 version, it has the heathen porn star Jessica Biel in it

Well that gets it on the Freehold ban list. Why does Hollywood destroy good family movies like this. The last thing our kids need is some depraved freak show with some harlot.

[Don Bozo el Guapo]

Originally Posted by Bobi-Jo

Well that gets it on the Freehold ban list. Why does Hollywood destroy good family movies like this. The last thing our kids need is some depraved freak show with some harlot.

Its not often I agree with you Bubba but this time I gotta hand it to ya. The remake of The Hitcher totally blew, But just imagine what Wes Craven could do with Steel Magnolias or Fried Green Tomatoes.

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by Don Bozo el Guapo

Its not often I agree with you Bubba but this time I gotta hand it to ya. The remake of The Hitcher totally blew, But just imagine what Wes Craven could do with Steel Magnolias or Fried Green Tomatoes.

The original Hitcher was good when that harlot was torn in two for her wanton conduct.

I have never seen Steel Magnolias or Fried Green Tomatoes since they are both on the black list for promoting cross dressing, lesbianism (Fried Green Tomatoes) and lesbianism and drug use (Steel Magnolias)

[SUV]

I found this movie rather GODLY myself, Brother, envisioning God Himself as the Man in the mask carrying the chainsaw, slicing up whatever sinners got in His way. And maybe a few who didn't.

I only wish I could have seen it with Don Bozo del Guapo - I Certainly™ would have "sprung" for the Hot Buttered Popcorn

[Don Bozo el Guapo]

Originally Posted by Bobi-Jo aka Pricilla Queen of the Desert

The original Hitcher was good when that harlot was torn in two for her wanton conduct.

I have never seen Steel Magnolias or Fried Green Tomatoes since they are both on the black list for promoting cross dressing, lesbianism (Fried Green Tomatoes) and lesbianism and drug use (Steel Magnolias)

You really need to see some flics without Richard Gere or Barbara Strisand.

Originally Posted by SU<

I found this movie rather GODLY myself, Brother, envisioning God Himself as the Man in the mask carrying the chainsaw, slicing up whatever sinners got in His way. And maybe a few who didn't.

I only wish I could have seen it with Don Bozo del Guapo - I Certainly™ would have "sprung" for the Hot Buttered Popcorn

Hola SU< mi nina, Is there a Drive In up there in Freehold ?

[SUV]

Originally Posted by Don Bozo el Guapo

Hola SU< mi nina, Is there a Drive In up there in Freehold ?

Don Bozo, Chiquito Lindo, we could rent the thing and get in some packages of those Candies like they sell in the theaters, like maybe Milk Duds and Raisinets. I love these sorts of Chewy Chocolates because they tell you instantly if you have 'cavities' without the need
to see a sinful, secular, dentist!

[Don Bozo el Guapo]

Originally Posted by SU<

Don Bozo, Chiquito Lindo, we could rent the thing and get in some packages of those Candies like they sell in the theaters, like maybe Milk Duds and Raisinets. I love these sorts of Chewy Chocolates because they tell you instantly if you have 'cavities' without the need
to see a sinful, secular, dentist!

Hola SU< mi nina, Ah the Drive In, It brings back such sweet and sweaty memories, tasty too and not just the Milk Duds and Rasinets but the Red Hots and Good and Plentys who were usually my Drive In dates. Its good to know Freehold has a Drive In because sex ed should never be taught in our schools. If we rent it we could pick our own movies. Might I suggest a triple feature of Evil Dead, Evil Dead II and Army of Darkness ?

[SUV]

Originally Posted by Don Bozo el Guapo

Might I suggest a triple feature of Evil Dead, Evil Dead II and Army of Darkness ?

Don Bozo, mi Primero - Is there any chance that "Army of Darkness" might be subtitled as "Evil Dead III?"

[Don Bozo el Guapo]

Originally Posted by SU<

Don Bozo, mi Primero - Is there any chance that "Army of Darkness" might be subtitled as "Evil Dead III?"

Hola SU< mi nina. I think the subtitle was Trapped in Time, Surrounded by Evil, Low on Gas. But Evil Dead III sounds good. My favorite Title Has allways been Teenage Mutant Vampire Lesbians from Outer Space. But Ive never been able to find the DVD. Does LBC have one in thier archives?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by Don Bozo el Guapo

Hola SU< mi nina. I think the subtitle was Trapped in Time, Surrounded by Evil, Low on Gas. But Evil Dead III sounds good. My favorite Title Has always been Teenage Mutant Vampire Lesbians from Outer Space. But Ive never been able to find the DVD. Does LBC have one in their archives?

We Pastors have our own, ahem, private library of DVDs, which document all manner of depravity and secular "entertainment." We view them for True Christian™ study purposes only, of course.

So, how's it hanging, Guapo? Been staying out of the beaner hoosegow?

[Don Bozo el Guapo]

Originally Posted by Passtor Ezekiepoo

We Pastors have our own, ahem, private library of DVDs, which document all manner of depravity and secular "entertainment." We view them for True Christian™ study purposes only, of course.

So, how's it hanging, Guapo? Been staying out of the beaner hoosegow?

Hola Joto, Im in Froglandia right now on a recruting drive of sorts, Swine flu depleated my stock back at the Pole Dancing Academy. Great Food, Wine and Champaigne here but lousey beer. But then again Im just a Night Train and Cheeze Wiz kinda guy. Can I sit in on one of your study groups?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by Don Bozo el Guapo

Hola Joto, Im in Froglandia right now on a recruting drive of sorts, Swine flu depleated my stock back at the Pole Dancing Academy. Great Food, Wine and Champaigne here but lousey beer. But then again Im just a Night Train and Cheeze Wiz kinda guy. Can I sit in on one of your study groups?

Anytime pal. We might want you to take a bath first. Maybe put on some clean clothes. Got any?

[SUV]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

Anytime pal. We might want you to take a bath first. Maybe put on some clean clothes. Got any?

Pastor Ezekiel, as you might remember, last CHRISTMAS I arranged to send Don Bozo some "putas" - as was his desire

I am thinking "putas" may be stylish 'pantaloons,' as it were, or perhaps some of those colorful Mexican "camisos."

And so, mi Precioso is likely to show up very "well dressed."

Or perhaps Don Bozo instead rides his "puta" -? A Man needs something to ride, don't you agree, Pastor? Or, perhaps, a horse is termed by another Name (my Spanish really is kind of rusty). As a True Christian Lady® little SUV doesn't know a caballo from a puta from a hawk from a handsaw!

PS Perhaps as a Love Offering Don Bozo may actually bring along some extra "putas" for all of you Pastors!