Focus on Family - Christian Parenting A place where parents can get good Godly advice on how to raise a family: how to properly administer corporal punishment, which movies to avoid, and more! |
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-25-2010, 06:49 PM
All loving parents know that you have to hit a child with a rod to properly raise it.
God is very clear about that:
- Proverbs 23:13-14 "Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell."
- Proverbs 13:24 "He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes."
Less clear is the perfect age to start doing this. Fortunately True Christian™ science has now finally solved that mystery.
Using advanced ultrasound scans of a foetus, True Christian™ researchers have found that connections in the foetal brain are not fully formed before 24 weeks. In practical terms this means the best time to start hitting the child with a rod is about 16 weeks before it is born. Usually this is also a period in which your wife starts neglecting her duties so you can hit two birds with one stone by hitting hard with a rod on the belly of the pregnant woman. Make sure to be forceful enough, otherwise the child will not notice!
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
Last edited by Cranky Old Man; 06-26-2010 at 06:09 PM.
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As pure and virginal as the driven snow.
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-25-2010, 06:54 PM
@ Cranky Old Man I am glad my father properly raised me!
I Jesus!
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-25-2010, 07:51 PM
If she's preggers she's going to be getting more medical attention, so do you have any suggestions on how to reduce any bruising?
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-25-2010, 07:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King
If she's preggers she's going to be getting more medical attention, so do you have any suggestions on how to reduce any bruising?
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This always works on my wife Ethel!
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Posts: 22,424
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Close to God
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-25-2010, 08:49 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King
how to reduce any bruising?
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If there is any, it will be similar to stretch marks. Just make sure to hit parallel to the stretch marks.
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Friendliest Fellow in all of Freehold
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Location: Leviticus Landing, Freehold, Iowa.
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-25-2010, 09:06 PM
May I suggest placing an ice-pack on the bruises? This also gives the unborn child a chill, maybe this will help their discipline once they are born.
6 A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
"But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"
Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.
GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-25-2010, 09:44 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by WinnerNotSinner
May I suggest placing an ice-pack on the bruises? This also gives the unborn child a chill, maybe this will help their discipline once they are born.
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Be sure to reapeat the action a few times. Because the unborn child won't remember everything after the first time.
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As pure and virginal as the driven snow.
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-25-2010, 09:46 PM
@ Brother Daniel Welcome! I hope we can be friends!
Since you are new here please look at our please read this before posting and our your rights on this forum threads! If you already did that, just do it again. There you can learn that this forum is not about debating or unsaved opinions but about praising Jesus!
If you didn't do that yet, it would be great if you could make a thread of your own in the introductions section of the forum! That way everyone here can meet you and see how much you love Jesus!
I Jesus!
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-25-2010, 09:52 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Felicity
@ Brother Daniel Welcome! I hope we can be friends!
Since you are new here please look at our please read this before posting and our your rights on this forum threads! If you already did that, just do it again. There you can learn that this forum is not about debating or unsaved opinions but about praising Jesus!
If you didn't do that yet, it would be great if you could make a thread of your own in the introductions section of the forum! That way everyone here can meet you and see how much you love Jesus!
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What a nice welcome! I'm very pleased to be a member of this forum. Finaly a place True Christians can talk. Without any debate. But just to praise the lord.
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-26-2010, 03:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
All loving parents know that you have to hit a child with a rod to properly raise it. God is very clear about that:
Proverbs 13:24 "He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes."
Less clear is the perfect age to start doing this. Fortunately True Christian™ science has now finally solved that mystery.
Using advanced ultrasound scans of a foetus, True Christian™ researchers have found that connections in the foetal brain are not fully formed before 24 weeks. In practical terms this means the best time to start hitting the child with a rod is about 16 weeks before it is born. Usually this is also a period in which your wife starts neglecting her duties so you can hit two birds with one stone by hitting hard with a rod on the belly of the pregnant woman. Make sure to be forceful enough, otherwise the child will not notice!
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Now I understand why my children were rebelious in the past.....
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-26-2010, 05:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
All loving parents know that you have to hit a child with a rod to properly raise it. God is very clear about that:
Proverbs 13:24 "He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes."
Less clear is the perfect age to start doing this. Fortunately True Christian™ science has now finally solved that mystery.
Using advanced ultrasound scans of a foetus, True Christian™ researchers have found that connections in the foetal brain are not fully formed before 24 weeks. In practical terms this means the best time to start hitting the child with a rod is about 16 weeks before it is born. Usually this is also a period in which your wife starts neglecting her duties so you can hit two birds with one stone by hitting hard with a rod on the belly of the pregnant woman. Make sure to be forceful enough, otherwise the child will not notice!
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Oh my gosh...
This HAS to be a joke. Please tell me you people don't really beat your wives and children. PLEASE. That's abusive and illegal. What's wrong with you? I'm literally crying at the moment because I'm terrified of you psychopaths.
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-26-2010, 06:00 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Madison007
Oh my gosh...
This HAS to be a joke. Please tell me you people don't really beat your wives and children. PLEASE. That's abusive and illegal. What's wrong with you? I'm literally crying at the moment because I'm terrified of you psychopaths.
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Why would we joke about this? Raising your childeren is something serious.
I think the only thing we are trying to do is to prefend that our children are going to grow up as psychopaths. I don't really see the problem.
Is it illegal? There is no illegal for me, as no one stands above the law!
God is the law.
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Posts: 22,424
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Location: Close to God
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-26-2010, 06:07 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Madison007
Please tell me you people don't really beat your wives and children. PLEASE. That's abusive and illegal. What's wrong with you? I'm literally crying at the moment because I'm terrified of you psychopaths.
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We have to beat our children! God demands this from us. If we don't hit our children they will burn in hell for all eternity!
Proverbs 23:13-14 "Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell."
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Fourm Member
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-26-2010, 08:03 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Madison007
Oh my gosh...
This HAS to be a joke. Please tell me you people don't really beat your wives and children. PLEASE. That's abusive and illegal. What's wrong with you? I'm literally crying at the moment because I'm terrified of you psychopaths.
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You are correct that abuse is illegal, however there is a huge difference between abuse and corrections.
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-26-2010, 09:41 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BelieverInGod
You are correct that abuse is illegal, however there is a huge difference between abuse and corrections.
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Is it illegal? Yes it is.
Did god say it isn't allowed? No he didn't!
Nobody stands above the law!
And god is the law!
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
True Christian™
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-26-2010, 09:42 PM
I was spanked as a child and it didn't hurt me. I don't have any pre-natal memories of discipline, but I'm sure I deserved it.
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Location: England, home of scrounging obese benefit claiming heathens
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-26-2010, 10:22 PM
Discipline has only become an issue in the last 10 years or so, strangely enough morals have dropped ten fold as a result.....
This is the most sensible forum ever!
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-27-2010, 07:20 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by new christian
Discipline has only become an issue in the last 10 years or so, strangely enough morals have dropped ten fold as a result.....
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I think the morals were dropped first, thus we had to increase the disciplinairy act even more!
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-27-2010, 07:50 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by new christian
Discipline has only become an issue in the last 10 years or so, strangely enough morals have dropped ten fold as a result.....
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Although I agree with you that as discipline dropped so have morals, it goes a lot further back than 10 years. I would say it started in the 50's in the subcultures with the beatniks, became more mainstream by the late 60's and has just spiralled since then.
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Unsaved trash, Godmocking foreigner
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Re: Start hitting your child with a rod 16 weeks before birth! -
06-30-2010, 12:12 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Madison007
Oh my gosh...
This HAS to be a joke. Please tell me you people don't really beat your wives and children. PLEASE. That's abusive and illegal. What's wrong with you? I'm literally crying at the moment because I'm terrified of you psychopaths.
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It's true
In Sweden we have a law that you can't hit your children cause it's abusive and illegal. Go beat up someone in your own size.
Beating women? ''You don't hit a girl'' it's simple as that!
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