Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > Christian history forum
Reload this Page A Historical Mystery Solved - God lives and is with us
Christian history forum This forum is dedicated to the history of Christianity, and its impact on the history of the world.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
Ezekiel Bathfire's Avatar
Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
Christ's Rottweiler
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Christian Love Real American™ Tithing Manager Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Senior Pastor Teabag Patriot TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Eats the Most Pork True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Nuts for JESUS! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Mower Donald Trump 2016! Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel Aardvark Bathfire Crown of Life Alternative Facts Probing for Jesus 20,000 posts Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 21,878
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default A Historical Mystery Solved - God lives and is with us - 09-05-2014, 08:55 PM

If I recall correctly, it was in the early autumn of 1683 that Tubalcain Morgan put on his hair-shirt as penance, as he had done every day for almost a year, for the sin of appreciating Doris Longland’s figure in her new dress.

Brother Tubalcain’s shame had caused him to separate himself from the flock and received only private ministrations from one of the Pastors. As was his wont, he was therefore alone as he walked into the wooded area known to us as the Groves of Golgotha but then known by some unpronounceable Injun name meaning “The Evil Woods of the Cursed Spirit.”

Tubalcain, who had not the slightest ounce of superstition within him, had quite naturally taken with him his Bible, a humble wooden cross and a knotted kerchief. In the latter was a small amount of sustenance: the rind of a cheese, a piece of bread, a dark lump of dried venison and an apple.

After a walk of a league of so, Tubalcain was deep in the woods and found a secluded spot beneath a fine tree for study. The subject was, as he later mentioned, learning the genealogy of Genesis. He had reached “Ge:10:24: And Arphaxad begat Salah; and Salah begat Eber.” when he thought it a good time to eat.

The cheese rind was particularly toothsome with the grayish coating adding to the piquancy. He carefully picked the green parts from the generously sized hunk of bread that he had been saving for this occasion and ate this with the venison that was the remains of a larger piece that he had traded an injun for a small knife some months earlier in the height of the summer.

It is at this point that the story becomes interesting (If anything at all can be more interesting than the genealogy of Genesis.) Tubalcain had returned to the Bible and he described how he appeared to be feeling a heat come from within and a sweat came upon his brow. He mentions how the world started to appear in more vivid colors, yet how the sounds of the forest became somewhat dulled and distant. His intestines felt as if there were something inside them and it is recounted that he felt that a great evil were upon him.

He returned to his Bible and tried to concentrate, but the words seemed to dance on the page and he realized that he had read Ge:11:25: And Nahor lived after he begat Terah an hundred and nineteen years, and begat sons and daughters. seven times without being able to remember who Nahor’s great-grandfather was!

It was then that the voice was heard: “The apple… eat of the apple, eat thereof, then thine eyes shall be opened, and thou shallt be as gods, knowing good and evil.” Tubalcain’s hand moved as it were of its own accord towards the apple. As he reached out, his head swum, sweat drenched his body and he fell to the side. There, in the tree was a serpent. But not a serpent that you or I have seen but a demon in the imperfect shape of a serpent. Staring eyes, body wrinkled with the ages and sins of the world, gray and loathsome. The serpent spoke again, “The apple, Tubalcain, the apple… partake thou of its sweetness, livest not in ignorance but deliverest thou thyself unto knowledge.”

Tubalcain told how he found he had grasped the apple and to his horror, his own left hand was conveying it to his mouth. He knew from his innermost soul that this knowledge would be his undoing. His bowels twitched violently but his left hand moved inexorably towards his mouth.

The demon slithered further down the trunk and was now no more than 6 feet from Tubalcain’s tortured body. Tubalcain readily admitted that he was terrified and felt his very soul try to eject itself from his body. He made a final effort with his right hand and, guided by Jesus, he grasped both the Bible and the cross. At the very moment the demon lunged to possess his soul, Tubalcain cried out: “In the Name of Jesus Christ I command thee! Be still!”

Tubalcain remembered nothing afterwards but was found on the outskirts of the settlement the following morning. He was leeched and fed gruel and herbs as prayers were said for his recovery. One Pastor remarked that the breath of the demon had affected him greatly, but, by faith alone, not fatally – 3 gallons of diarrhea and 2 quarts of vomit were carried away that day.

Once fully purged, Tubalcain recovered and gave the account that is now on view in Landover Christian Library.

It is worth adding that over the coming months, various parties were sent with Bible and Cross into the Groves of Golgotha, but neither the place nor any sign of demons were found.

Until today.

Today, whilst trying to find my nigrahounds, Master and Driver, I came across proof of the story and the truth of Tubalcain's account: set into the tree, in a manner that could only be done by the Power of The Holy Spirit, is the serpent demon! Proof of demons and proof that God lives and is as real as the angels:


Name:  Demon.jpg
Views: 91
Size:  244.3 KB

Checkmate atheists!





“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2021, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2018 all rights reserved