[Naomi Ruth Lamb]

One of my dear friends in Texas has homeschooled all of her 14 children, most of whom have gone on to take college courses online or at prestigious Christian universities where sin is unheard of and chastity is the law of the campus.


However, she was sad when her eldest daughter, Pansy Marie, said she wanted to attend the prom with a boy from the public school. Naturally, the question mortified her. After giving her time to cry and go on about it, I wondered: Would it be appropriate for parents to hold their own Christ-centered prom for their children and the children of other home-schooled precious families?


I see it as a glorious, prayer filled evening ending no later than 9 PM and with full parental chaperones (perhaps 3 per student). No dancing, just praising God and playing innocent, Bible centered games.


My friend's little Pansy isn't speaking to her at the moment - as if that's going to change anything! I am particularly interested in the response of Mrs. Etheldreda. Since your husband isn't home most nights anyway, I assume there would be no issue in using your basement for a prom in Freehold, with pastoral approval of course.


I might even make this a business venture: Naomi's Wholesome Proms. My rates would be reasonable and my God would be glorified at every event. I am always open to spreading out for new things.


So parents - what do you think? Pastors? Now you old fuddy duddies open up your minds for a moment before you pass judgment. You were young like me once.


Your faithful sister in Jesus,
NRL

[Thomas Taylor]

Sister Naomi,


No. They should not have proms. Look at what happened to my eldest son. He now calls himself Latasha, or something, and wears a dress. If any of my other children ask me if they can have a prom they will be locked in the prayer cupboard for a fortnight and birched each day. That is if they ever come back from wherever they disappeared to a while back. I am still sure that that Hezekiah fella had something to do with the disappearances.


Hope that helps.
YIC
TT

[Alvin Moss]

No dancing! Absolutely not! Dancing leads to lewd behavior and touching and inappropriate groping. After that, it's fornication and ruination. Just look around in the pool halls and the bingo parlors and you'll see the sad results of dancing. They're in there every night, smoking cigarettes, playing dominoes and drinking strong whisky.

Just say no to proms!

[Pooped Francis]

I don't seem to have this problem with my children as I have sold them for 40 shekels, I highly recommend this.

[Leviticus 11:2]

Thank you saved ones.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

I see no reason homeschoolers can't have a prom. Just combine it with a wholesome Purity Ball where the young ladies are escorted by and dance only with their fathers.

[I Man Rastafari]

I am willing to attend any senior proms where the young ladies are guaranteed to be of legal age. I do not want to suffer any repercussions from my willingness to provide diversity. If the prom is not close to my new home which is in Georgetown near Washington DC I will require monies for expenses including air travel lodging and meals.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Originally Posted by Mrs. Mary Whitford

I see no reason homeschoolers can't have a prom. Just combine it with a wholesome Purity Ball where the young ladies are escorted by and dance only with their fathers.

I quite agree! Proms are such hormone infested ordeals, I don't know anyone who actually enjoys them. However, Purity Balls are a glorious reminder to young ladies that one day they'll serve a husband with love and adoration, and in the mean time they can practice with their Daddies. It's a kind of pre-marriage, a pre-wedding feast if you will, that serves as a reminder to all girls that their fathers are personally and intimately focused and invested in their virginity. I think they're just lovely!

Some lovely photos of girls watched over by their fathers,
constantly vigilant, deeply invested in their virginal value.




Young lady signs a contract ensuring her father will be the safekeeper of her cooter,
and thus her value,
until he finds an adequate replacement for his duties.

[BrotherLarry]

I am in complete agreement that a prom is a traditional event for most students, and I think the idea that it is redesigned as a purity dance where fathers take their daughters or sons and enjoy quality time under their watchful eyes makes it a beautiful, sacred occasion.


I attended my first prom as a junior in high school. Because I was too shy to ask Mary Louise Marie Sue McCafferty to be my date, my mother called her mother. Mary's mom then passed the invite to her daughter. I wasn't too pleased when Mary showed up at my door wearing a very short, red taffeta dress (it showed all the tattoos on her thighs), and she danced with everyone except me. In her purse she had stowed cherry vodka, from which she sipped throughout the evening. I had promised mother to be home by 10, so I left Mary in the arms of "Tank" Freelandville, the school's football captain. She later gave birth to his child. Unfortunately, Tank didn't take responsibility for the baby and moved to Tulsa where he became a shoe salesman for profit.


My senior prom was a very different situation. Instead of asking a girl out, I took advantage of the rule that allowed boys to come unescorted. This kept me pure and I was able to spend time with some of the other unescorted boys - one of whom came home with me and we played manly games like wrestling and some water sports before hitting the sheets from exhaustion. It was a magical night.

[Megan1993]

Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda

I quite agree! Proms are such hormone infested ordeals, I don't know anyone who actually enjoys them. However, Purity Balls are a glorious reminder to young ladies that one day they'll serve a husband with love and adoration, and in the mean time they can practice with their Daddies. It's a kind of pre-marriage, a pre-wedding feast if you will, that serves as a reminder to all girls that their fathers are personally and intimately focused and invested in their virginity. I think they're just lovely!

Some lovely photos of girls watched over by their fathers,
constantly vigilant, deeply invested in their virginal value.




Young lady signs a contract ensuring her father will be the safekeeper of her cooter,
and thus her value,
until he finds an adequate replacement for his duties.

Those aren't really effective.


I went to highschool that had an in house purity ball. All teens pledged 85 percent ended pregnant when I dropped out.
A teenager who's pledged their virginity is more like oh idk 2x more likely to swipe their vcard or engage in anal.


besides women ain't chattel to be passed from one man to another. Idc if I sound like a feminazi. ( I'm not screw the 3rd wave and those B's ruining my men.)


Besides purity balls have like and undertone of incest to them. Why not just have regular prom with you know 2x chaperones.

[BrotherLarry]

Oh Megan, Megan, Megan!


How could you secularize the relationship between a man and his little snookum-wookums? How can you even think that a casual hug and kiss from daddy would create the moistness that occurs when lovers engage in the marital act (after marriage, of course)? I can recall my own father lovingly caressing my sister when Mother wasn't there to tuck her in. Often Father would have private time with her so she wouldn't feel lonely until Mother returned home.


One of my former coworkers attended a purity ball with his adorable daughter, Affinity. He described the event as a real bonding moment with her, and spoke in gentle, nostalgic tones about their contract signing and the pure, innocent kiss that followed.


If the prom is done right, I'm for it. The purity ball is not exactly a prom unless you rename it the Prom of the Pure. Either way, get your mind out of the gutter. True Christian™ men love their children deeply and will fight for the right to show it.


BrotherLarry

[Megan1993]

Originally Posted by BrotherLarry

Oh Megan, Megan, Megan!

How could you secularize the relationship between a man and his little snookum-wookums? How can you even think that a casual hug and kiss from daddy would create the moistness that occurs when lovers engage in the marital act (after marriage, of course)? I can recall my own father lovingly caressing my sister when Mother wasn't there to tuck her in. Often Father would have private time with her so she wouldn't feel lonely until Mother returned home.

One of my former coworkers attended a purity ball with his adorable daughter, Affinity. He described the event as a real bonding moment with her, and spoke in gentle, nostalgic tones about their contract signing and the pure, innocent kiss that followed.

If the prom is done right, I'm for it. The purity ball is not exactly a prom unless you rename it the Prom of the Pure. Either way, get your mind out of the gutter. True Christian™ men love their children deeply and will fight for the right to show it.

BrotherLarry

Yeah it's just creepy to me the idea that father OWNS his daughters virginity. I'm sorry if I offendedyou. But from my own lived in experience I've seen purity balls happen in my school and abstinence only education. It just simply doesn't work. I mean if you want to throw as many balls you want fine...but teenagers really don't fear god at that age.

They don't think about their actions... they're still developing and the spirit of rebellion is strong. I think if you want to a better Idea is just have a prom.

Essentially teens believe they are invincible..

I mean think about it this way..the more you say no the more tempting and forbidden it becomes. By making a big spectacle of it... your only increasing the appeal. If I learned anything from my parents the best way to prevent bad behavior is to limit the appeal of rebellion.

I'm not saying let a free for all...but to suppress rebellion it best not to make sex taboo.
Otherwise we'll get opposite results.

[Jim C. Lombardo]

Originally Posted by Megan1993

Yeah it's just creepy to me the idea that father OWNS his daughters virginity. I'm sorry if I offendedyou. But from my own lived in experience I've seen purity balls happen in my school and abstinence only education. It just simply doesn't work. I mean if you want to throw as many balls you want fine...but teenagers really don't fear god at that age.

Of course they don't fear God. I remember when I was a dumb unsaved teenager once. I was at that naive supple age where I thought I was too cool for Jesus, and then I made a mess of my life. Most teenagers are like this, without a lick of wisdom in their hormone-riddled bones.

Originally Posted by Megan1993

Essentially teens believe they are invincible..

That and drugs.

Originally Posted by Megan1993

I mean think about it this way..the more you say no the more tempting and forbidden it becomes. By making a big spectacle of it... your only increasing the appeal. If I learned anything from my parents the best way to prevent bad behavior is to limit the appeal of rebellion.

I'm not saying let a free for all...but to suppress rebellion it best not to make sex taboo.
Otherwise we'll get opposite results.

By your own logic, I'm sure you've heard many tell you, "No" you are not getting into heaven, you wanton brat. Does hearing that make you could regret your sullen, slutty ways and wish you could go to Heaven? Of course!

I recommend you open your Bible and turn to Revelation to see the big spectacle that is the Apocalypse and what happens to those who spit on Jesus!

[Megan1993]

Originally Posted by Jim C. Lombardo

Of course they don't fear God. I remember when I was a dumb unsaved teenager once. I was at that naive supple age where I thought I was too cool for Jesus, and then I made a mess of my life. Most teenagers are like this, without a lick of wisdom in their hormone-riddled bones.




That and drugs.






By your own logic, I'm sure you've heard many tell you, "No" you are not getting into heaven, you wanton brat. Does hearing that make you could regret your sullen, slutty ways and wish you could go to Heaven? Of course!

I recommend you open your Bible and turn to Revelation to see the big spectacle that is the Apocalypse and what happens to those who spit on Jesus!

I'm not spitting on Jesus..Idk where in the bible it says one must have purity balls. Besides according to my branch of Christianity as long as I confess my sins make penance and go through my last rites when i'm guaranteed heaven.


Besides how can anyone here know and prove that they're right? When all you have is a book written by many authors in a span of 100s of years with different cultures and societal expectations. It's not like god written the book himself and dropped it someone's head one day. It was written passed through many authors then rewritten again for the many branches of Christianity to suit their needs at the time.


For all I know all us could be all wrong...and we could be worshipping some flying spaghetti monster in the sky. I guess when you feel like you're right it reeks of some arrogance because how do you an earthly man claim to know God's intent when god is above you and thus has a final say?


At least I'm not arrogant enough to claim with out a doubt that anyone is going to hell..because I'm not god. I don't know what his thought processes are. I'd like to believe him a loving and merciful father of his own creation who weeps for his lost wayward children. Because if we are the image of him surely god can feel sadness and have mercy.


It's okay to believe in things but when it comes to knowing what god is going to do is pure arrogance when you're only mere speck in his creation.

[Basilissa]

Originally Posted by Megan1993

I'm not spitting on Jesus..Idk where in the bible it says one must have purity balls.

It doesn't. It does, however, specify that a daughter is her father's property. A girl cannot decide with whom to have sex; it's the father who gets money for his daughter's virginity, either through marriage, or through a different type of arrangement:

Exodus 21:7-10
7 And if a man sell his daughter to be a maidservant, she shall not go out as the menservants do.
8 If she please not her master, who hath betrothed her to himself, then shall he let her be redeemed: to sell her unto a strange nation he shall have no power, seeing he hath dealt deceitfully with her.
9 And if he have betrothed her unto his son, he shall deal with her after the manner of daughters.
10 If he take him another wife; her food, her raiment, and her duty of marriage, shall he not diminish.

I think this passage is quite clear. A daughter is the property of her father, who can decide to sell her as a sex slave. This is the importance of female purity. If the girl has sex without her father's consent, she's damaged goods and cannot be sold into marriage nor slavery.

Besides according to my branch of Christianity as long as I confess my sins make penance and go through my last rites when i'm guaranteed heaven.

This is actually correct (except the last rites part, that's not in the Bible). A person can live a life of the worst unimaginable sin, and if they repent on their deathbed they are Saved (just like one of the sinners who were nailed together with Jesus). Emperor Constantine took a full advantage of this loophole, living a happy life of pillaging, raping, murdering, and generally carpe diem, but he converted at the moment of his death, and lo and behold - he's a Catholic saint now.

It does make you think, who else might have converted on their death bed. Lenin? Stalin? Hitler? Mussolini? Franco? Pinochet? Emperor Nero? Attila the Hun? If any of them converted at the last minute, they are destined to rest on Abraham's bosom (Luke 16:22) for eternity!

Besides how can anyone here know and prove that they're right? When all you have is a book written by many authors in a span of 100s of years with different cultures and societal expectations. It's not like god written the book himself and dropped it someone's head one day. It was written passed through many authors then rewritten again for the many branches of Christianity to suit their needs at the time.

Well, this is a slippery slope. As a Christian (of any faith, even Catholic) you are expected to believe that the Holy Bible is the Word of God. The Bible is the foundation of Christianity.

If you take away God's influence from the Bible, there is no reason to be a Christian, as basically 100% of the Bible could, hypothetically, be a lie. There is no way to independently confirm any of it - especially since there is weak to none confirmation of pivotal Biblical events (such as life and death of Jesus) from non-Christian sources.

So you need to make a decision. Do you want to continue being Christian? Accepting the entire Holy Bible as the Word of God is an intrinsic part of that package deal. Or do you want to abandon your faith in favor of logic and science and whatnot?

For all I know all us could be all wrong...and we could be worshipping some flying spaghetti monster in the sky. I guess when you feel like you're right it reeks of some arrogance because how do you an earthly man claim to know God's intent when god is above you and thus has a final say?

Well, that's basically the underlying principle of faith, which by definition is a belief held without supporting evidence.

At least I'm not arrogant enough to claim with out a doubt that anyone is going to hell..because I'm not god. I don't know what his thought processes are.

Well. We are Christians, which means we believe that the Holy Bible is the Word of God, which means we can make informed deductions based on the contents of the Bible.

I'd like to believe him a loving and merciful father of his own creation who weeps for his lost wayward children.

A weeping "god" would imply a god that is powerless. Who cannot help his "lost wayward children" in any way.

Because if we are the image of him surely god can feel sadness and have mercy.

Wait a minute: I thought you said that the Bible was a collection of texts written and rewritten over generations?! You cannot first undermine the validity of the Bible as an authority and then cite it as an authority (Genesis 1:27) when it suits you! Pick a side, dear - you cannot eat your cake and have it, too!

[Jim C. Lombardo]

Originally Posted by Megan1993

II'd like to believe him a loving and merciful father of his own creation who weeps for his lost wayward children. Because if we are the image of him surely god can feel sadness and have mercy.

God is not a cry-baby sissy. Never has He weeped like some despondent housewife in the Bible, nor has He any reason to. Our Lord is perfect and always in control of His emotions. My father never cried either.

I know you like to imagine God as some alt-hipster, touchy-feely New Age Dad type, but that's not the God of old in the Bible, hunny!

[Dolores de Barriga]

Originally Posted by Megan1993

Besides how can anyone here know and prove that they're right? When all you have is a book written by many authors in a span of 100s of years with different cultures and societal expectations. It's not like god written the book himself and dropped it someone's head one day. It was written passed through many authors then rewritten again for the many branches of Christianity to suit their needs at the time.

Hello Miss Megan. I agree with you. Large chunks of the Old Testament have been copied from older Mesopotamian sources. The creation story is clearly based on Enuma Elish. The Flood story is a revamped version of Gilgamesh. Story of Moses is modeled after the biography of Sargon the Great - the basket in the river and all. The Old Testament laws were modeled after the Ur-Nammu and later Hammurabi law codes - which was possibly copied from Urukagina's, but that text didn't survive.


Moving on to the New Testament, the whole die-for-your-sins idea is clearly a reheated Osiris story, and John's gospel is so Gnostic it's truly surprising that it was not thrown to the Apocrypha pile when the canon of the Bible was being decided.


I wish humanity invented writing earlier than it did. Then, maybe we could trace the religion lineage all the way to the oldest temple on earth, and understand the evolution of religions better.

For all I know all us could be all wrong...and we could be worshipping some flying spaghetti monster in the sky. I guess when you feel like you're right it reeks of some arrogance because how do you an earthly man claim to know God's intent when god is above you and thus has a final say?

Exactly. Maybe this lovely community is correct, but maybe they are wrong and the Baha'i are correct. Or maybe the Suhrawardiyya Sufi Muslims are the ones who got it right, and everyone else is wrong. Or maybe only some random shamanistic Siberian tribe is right. Or maybe all religions are wrong and have been invented to bring comfort for in times of suffering, and to keep masses in control of the elites?

I'd like to believe him a loving and merciful father of his own creation who weeps for his lost wayward children. Because if we are the image of him surely god can feel sadness and have mercy.

This is a very interesting vision. A god weeping when people kill each other in his name. Tell me, does he not interfere in all of these mass murders because he can't, or because he doesn't want to - he prefers weeping over action?

It's okay to believe in things but when it comes to knowing what god is going to do is pure arrogance when you're only mere speck in his creation.

True. We are just lab rats in God's laboratory. He doesn't care about individual rats, He's just observing an experiment.

...Of course, then I remember Hell and I'm afraid I'm going there for my heretic thoughts.

[MitzaLizalor]

I got as far as your first hyphen. Why would any Christian be interested in reading about the very savages against whom Jesus struggled to preserve the line so that He could be born? Sargon was a wanton idolator. What does God call such people? Harlots. How does God describe their cultures and societies? Whoredom.

HOSEA 4 .KJV . whole chapter
1 Hear the word of the LORD, ye children of Israel: for the LORD hath a controversy with the inhabitants of the land, because there is no truth, nor mercy, nor knowledge of God in the land..
12 My people ask counsel at their stocks, and their staff declareth unto them: for the spirit of whoredoms hath caused them to err, and they have gone a whoring from under their God.
14b They sacrifice with harlots: therefore the people that doth not understand shall fall.

How do we know Sargon even existed at all?

[Dolores de Barriga]

Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor

I got as far as your first hyphen. Why would any Christian be interested in reading about the very savages against whom Jesus struggled to preserve the line so that He could be born? Sargon was a wanton idolator. What does God call such people? Harlots. How does God describe their cultures and societies? Whoredom.

Indeed Miss Mitza. The Bible depicts great civilizations of Mesopotamia in a very negative way, underscoring all of the differences - probably because ancient Israelites were inclined to focus on the similarities deriving from common ethnic/cultural/linguistic descent. I humbly accept your critique; I should not have questioned the originality of the Bible on a Christian forum. I suppose the opposite is possible, too, that the older Sumerian/Babylonian sources have plagiarized the Bible before the Bible was written down. And this latter explanation definitely fits better within Christian paradigm.

[GaleWhoring the Boring (On Moderation)]

Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor

I got as far as your first hyphen. Why would any Christian be interested in reading about the very savages against whom Jesus struggled to preserve the line so that He could be born? Sargon was a wanton idolator. What does God call such people? Harlots. How does God describe their cultures and societies? Whoredom.

HOSEA 4 .KJV . whole chapter
1 Hear the word of the LORD, ye children of Israel: for the LORD hath a controversy with the inhabitants of the land, because there is no truth, nor mercy, nor knowledge of God in the land..
12 My people ask counsel at their stocks, and their staff declareth unto them: for the spirit of whoredoms hath caused them to err, and they have gone a whoring from under their God.
14b They sacrifice with harlots: therefore the people that doth not understand shall fall.

How do we know Sargon even existed at all?

I thought Sargon was a character from Lord of the Rings? Does this mean Tolkien plagiarized from the Bible too? I suppose there are some similarities.

[Megan1993]

Originally Posted by Dolores de Barriga

Hello Miss Megan. I agree with you. Large chunks of the Old Testament have been copied from older Mesopotamian sources. The creation story is clearly based on Enuma Elish. The Flood story is a revamped version of Gilgamesh. Story of Moses is modeled after the biography of Sargon the Great - the basket in the river and all. The Old Testament laws were modeled after the Ur-Nammu and later Hammurabi law codes - which was possibly copied from Urukagina's, but that text didn't survive.


Moving on to the New Testament, the whole die-for-your-sins idea is clearly a reheated Osiris story, and John's gospel is so Gnostic it's truly surprising that it was not thrown to the Apocrypha pile when the canon of the Bible was being decided.


I wish humanity invented writing earlier than it did. Then, maybe we could trace the religion lineage all the way to the oldest temple on earth, and understand the evolution of religions better.

Exactly. Maybe this lovely community is correct, but maybe they are wrong and the Baha'i are correct. Or maybe the Suhrawardiyya Sufi Muslims are the ones who got it right, and everyone else is wrong. Or maybe only some random shamanistic Siberian tribe is right. Or maybe all religions are wrong and have been invented to bring comfort for in times of suffering, and to keep masses in control of the elites?

This is a very interesting vision. A god weeping when people kill each other in his name. Tell me, does he not interfere in all of these mass murders because he can't, or because he doesn't want to - he prefers weeping over action?

True. We are just lab rats in God's laboratory. He doesn't care about individual rats, He's just observing an experiment.

...Of course, then I remember Hell and I'm afraid I'm going there for my heretic thoughts.

Because if God has endowed us with free will wouldn't him intervening undermine the freewill he intended us to have?