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Default Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-10-2007, 09:32 AM
Our loving prayers are extended to Republican Senator David Vitter, who Jesus has washed clean of buggering high-priced DC whores up the bung hole. Amen.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19685977/


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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-10-2007, 10:00 AM
The Lord has seen fit to forgive his past Sins.
Just goes to show the power of Prayer

AMEN Brother Larry


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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-10-2007, 12:34 PM
Praise Jesus. I can only hope and pray that when my time comes, Jesus will be as forgiving with me.

Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-10-2007, 03:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Praise Jesus. I can only hope and pray that when my time comes, Jesus will be as forgiving with me.
Nonsense Zeke, what is there to for Christ to forgive. Don't tell me even you are starting to believe Rachel’s lies about you? A pastor forcing his daughter into an immoral act with a captive bear. How utterly absurd and only something a pagan would come up with.

But it is praiseful the good Senator has been able to escape the tentacles of that harlot and find his way back to Christ.


Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-10-2007, 05:20 PM
GLORY!!

It is gratifying to see so many True Christians™ receive total and unmitigated forgiveness from the Lord. Their abiding faith, their sincere repentance, and their affiliation with the Republican party has absolved them completely, earned the respect and admiration of their fellow Christians, and saved them from an eternity in hell.

Honestly, I don't even know why DEMONcrats bother to go to church or apologize for their mistakes-- no one's listening to their insincere apologies, their lies, their blasphemy, their trickery, or their policies--- least of all God. Go tell it to Satan, losers!!
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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-11-2007, 02:04 AM
Err...shouldn't we be condemning him to hell fire? Ted Haggard didn't get a break and he had his own church and only did it with one hooker!

Tir'd, and despairing, O celestial maid,
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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-11-2007, 02:13 AM
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Err...shouldn't we be condemning him to hell fire? Ted Haggard didn't get a break and he had his own church and only did it with one hooker!
Ted Haggard is a 100% straight homersexual. Enough said. Besides, David Vitter has his wife, Wendy Vitter to contend with. And -- based on Wendy's comment from 2000, when she was asked about Hillary's forgiving response to Bill's extramarital affairs -- Wendy seems a tad less forgiving than Jesus:

"I'm a lot more like Lorena Bobbitt than Hillary. If he does something like that, I'm walking away with one thing, and it's not alimony, trust me."

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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-11-2007, 02:25 AM
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Originally Posted by Larry Lee View Post
Ted Haggard is a 100% straight homersexual. Enough said. Besides, David Vitter has his wife, Wendy Vitter to contend with. And -- based on Wendy's comment from 2000, when she was asked about Hillary's forgiving response to Bill's extramarital affairs -- Wendy seems a tad less forgiving than Jesus:

"I'm a lot more like Lorena Bobbitt than Hillary. If he does something like that, I'm walking away with one thing, and it's not alimony, trust me."
Oh yes, that's right, I forgot about the homo element. Poor Mr. Vitter! Perhaps our good Landover elders can get him a protective metal girdle to protect his unmentionables?

(Wendy, if you're reading this, whatever you do, be sure to upload it to Youtube, show 'em how it's done. )

Tir'd, and despairing, O celestial maid,
I'm caught, I cry'd, without thy heav'nly aid.
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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-11-2007, 03:13 AM
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Originally Posted by Sister Talitha View Post
The Lord has seen fit to forgive his past Sins.
Just goes to show the power of Prayer

AMEN Brother Larry



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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-11-2007, 08:25 PM
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Originally Posted by Larry Lee View Post
David Vitter has his wife, Wendy Vitter to contend with. And -- based on Wendy's comment from 2000, when she was asked about Hillary's forgiving response to Bill's extramarital affairs -- Wendy seems a tad less forgiving than Jesus:

"I'm a lot more like Lorena Bobbitt than Hillary. If he does something like that, I'm walking away with one thing, and it's not alimony, trust me."
SURPRISE! SURPRISE! The Godly Republican Senator's uppity, shrewish wife forced him into having mad, rutting sex with prostitutes. In today's news we learn that Senator David Vitter enjoyed the services of "at work" prostitutes in DC and "at home" prostitutes in New Orleans. The Madame of the house he frequented in New Orleans shared the following knowing words about the hapless Senator's harpy wife:

"As far as the girls coming out after seeing David, all they had was nice things to say. It wasn't all about sex. In fact, he just wanted to have somebody listen to him, you know. And I said his wife must not be listening"

And there you have it. Another strong Christian man brought down by the actions of his wife. I know I speak for all of the True Christians™ here at Landover, when I lay the blame for the Senator's unfortunate downfall squarely at the wife's feet. It's all her fault. Every bit of it.

And to think, Senator Vitter was making such impressive headway in solving what he had identified as this country's most pressing national issue: Man-man weddin's. And he was such an unparalleled spokesman for traditional Christian social values. Now where will we turn for damning judgments on how Americans should have sex; marry; raise their kids; and fish those kids out of the floodwaters of drowned American cities? I ask you.

You may as well read about the Senator's New Orleans whoremongering:

http://www.salon.com/wire/ap/archive...D8QAEOTG0.html

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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-12-2007, 02:11 AM
So his wife didn't understand him?

Oh the poor baby,how tragic for him!

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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-12-2007, 03:39 AM
It's official: the man is a limp-wristed homogirl. He broke his vows because his wife wouldn't listen to his prrooooooblems? What a poor widdle baby, having to pay for prostitutes in DC AND New Orleans so you could pay people to have heart to hearts. Can we condemn him to hell fire now? Pleeeaaaaase?

Tir'd, and despairing, O celestial maid,
I'm caught, I cry'd, without thy heav'nly aid.
Help me, Diana, help a nymph forlorn,
Devoted to the woods, who long has worn
Thy livery, and long thy quiver born. - Ovid
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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-12-2007, 04:47 AM
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It's official: the man is a limp-wristed homogirl. He broke his vows because his wife wouldn't listen to his prrooooooblems? What a poor widdle baby, having to pay for prostitutes in DC AND New Orleans so you could pay people to have heart to hearts. Can we condemn him to hell fire now? Pleeeaaaaase?
Yes, what is wrong with this guy? Why didn't he act like a Christ and beat on his wife until she shut up?


Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-12-2007, 08:58 AM
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Originally Posted by Larry Lee View Post
And to think, Senator Vitter was making such impressive headway in solving what he had identified as this country's most pressing national issue: Man-man weddin's.
You raise a valuable point: this story shows exactly why we must defend the Holy Institution of Matrimony. A man sleeping with harlots across half a continent behind his wife's back is bad enough as it is, but imagine how much more sinful it'd be if his wife was a man! Why, under Demoncrat rule, the wife who nagged Senator Vitter into fornicating would probably be a mustachioed fireman named Edgar. God wanted Adam to cheat on Eve, not on Steve!

O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Jesus forgives Republican whoremongers - 07-13-2007, 02:38 AM
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Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
Yes, what is wrong with this guy? Why didn't he act like a Christ and beat on his wife until she shut up?
I wouldn't be surprised if he let his wife beat him up -- sounds like he was chatterbox, first sign of demon gayness -- and he liked it. Satan has already oiled up his fiery pitchfork in anticipation of their "heart to heart" sessions.

Tir'd, and despairing, O celestial maid,
I'm caught, I cry'd, without thy heav'nly aid.
Help me, Diana, help a nymph forlorn,
Devoted to the woods, who long has worn
Thy livery, and long thy quiver born. - Ovid
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