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The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

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Capatain Capatain is offline
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Default Me again. - 10-11-2006, 02:02 AM

Sorry about the double post. I didn't know what it meant to "close this thread after you submit your message." Cut me some slack. I'm a PC challenged old fart.
I still need help getting into my user CP. Thanks.
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Jesus is Lord Jesus is Lord is offline
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Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 02:42 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capatain View Post
Sorry about the double post. I didn't know what it meant to "close this thread after you submit your message." Cut me some slack. I'm a PC challenged old fart.
I still need help getting into my user CP. Thanks.
Jesus will tell the Pastors when He feels you have earned access to your Control Panel. Post a while and He may just decide to allow you access.
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Fish (On Moderation) Fish is offline
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Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 03:01 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capatain View Post
Sorry about the double post. I didn't know what it meant to "close this thread after you submit your message." Cut me some slack. I'm a PC challenged old fart.
I still need help getting into my user CP. Thanks.
There is nothing exciting in the CP trust me. I don't have access nor do I miss it.
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Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden

 
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Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 03:48 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capatain View Post
Sorry about the double post. I didn't know what it meant to "close this thread after you submit your message." Cut me some slack. I'm a PC challenged old fart.
I still need help getting into my user CP. Thanks.
Unless you have something meaningful to say, please refrain from posting. This thread is virtually meaningless, thanks to your diminished mental capacity.

The title of this section is "The introduction forum", not "spew gibberish and imagine its clever forum". If you'd like to introduce yourself properly, do so now. If nothing of value appears here within the next few hours, this thread will be deleted, "Captain".


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Fish (On Moderation) Fish is offline
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Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 03:52 AM

Feel the love.
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Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden

 
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Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 03:57 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fish View Post
Feel the love.
Listen nancyboy, Jesus is all about love. He loves you so much that He's ready to send you straight to hell for smoking your boyfriend's skinflute RIGHT NOW! Better watch your mouth, homer, or you'll feel the love of Jesus all the way up to your colon.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Fish's Avatar
Fish (On Moderation) Fish is offline
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Posts: 317
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Fish is fearful, unbelieving, a liar, a whoremonger, and abominable. Has a place in the Lake of Fire secured.
Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 04:17 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
He's ready to send you straight to hell for smoking your boyfriend's skinflute RIGHT NOW!
Ok but I don't have a boyfriend.
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Jesus is Lord Jesus is Lord is offline
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Jesus is Lord has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jesus is Lord has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jesus is Lord has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jesus is Lord has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jesus is Lord has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jesus is Lord has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jesus is Lord has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jesus is Lord has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jesus is Lord has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jesus is Lord has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jesus is Lord has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 04:20 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fish View Post
Ok but I don't have a boyfriend.
You can lie to us but not to Jesus. He sees all, He knows what you do in bathroom stalls.

Repent, homer. Turn or Burn!
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Fish's Avatar
Fish (On Moderation) Fish is offline
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Posts: 317
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Fish is fearful, unbelieving, a liar, a whoremonger, and abominable. Has a place in the Lake of Fire secured.
Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 04:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesus is Lord View Post
Repent, homer. Turn or Burn!
Why do you all call me Homer? My name isn't Homer.
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SalvationSeeker SalvationSeeker is offline
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Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 04:24 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fish View Post
Why do you all call me Homer? My name isn't Homer.
Because you are a homersexual, you slow sinner.
Get on your knees and REPENT for your butt-buggering at once!


If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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Fish (On Moderation) Fish is offline
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Fish is fearful, unbelieving, a liar, a whoremonger, and abominable. Has a place in the Lake of Fire secured.
Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 04:38 AM

But I did repent, I'm a Christian.

By the way, I'm not a homosexual but I'm flattered by your offer.
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SalvationSeeker SalvationSeeker is offline
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Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 04:47 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fish View Post
But I did repent, I'm a Christian.

By the way, I'm not a homosexual but I'm flattered by your offer.
So you're saying you aren't a homer but yet here you are, trying to seduce us Godly men of Landover to your awful lifestyle choice..
Enjoy hell, retard.


If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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Bobby-Joe Bobby-Joe is offline
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Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 04:01 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fish View Post
But I did repent, I'm a Christian.

By the way, I'm not a homosexual but I'm flattered by your offer.
Friend,

You may call yourself a Christian, but does Jesus call you a TRUE Christian™? With your interest in homerism I think not. Let Jesus take you in His saving embrace, fill you with His love and drive the homer demon out of you.



Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

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Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Fish (On Moderation) Fish is offline
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Default Re: Me again. - 10-11-2006, 11:17 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
Friend,

You may call yourself a Christian, but does Jesus call you a TRUE Christian™? With your interest in homerism I think not. Let Jesus take you in His saving embrace, fill you with His love and drive the homer demon out of you.
Your opinions have been duly noted friend.
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Capatain Capatain is offline
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Default Re: Me again. - 10-12-2006, 12:59 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesus is Lord View Post
Jesus will tell the Pastors when He feels you have earned access to your Control Panel. Post a while and He may just decide to allow you access.
Jesus talks to the pastors? Huh, fancy that. Tell Jesus I need a hundred bucks by tomorrow. If I don't get it I'll know you're lyingl.
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Capatain Capatain is offline
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Default Re: Me again. - 10-12-2006, 01:07 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Unless you have something meaningful to say, please refrain from posting. This thread is virtually meaningless, thanks to your diminished mental capacity.

The title of this section is "The introduction forum", not "spew gibberish and imagine its clever forum". If you'd like to introduce yourself properly, do so now. If nothing of value appears here within the next few hours, this thread will be deleted, "Captain".
Go right ahead, whippersnapper. I doubt if there's anything I could say that would impress someone so anal retentive as yourself.
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Bobby-Joe Bobby-Joe is offline
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NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
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One Year/1000 posts Long service medal, 2nd class Saved 1 Year Saved 5 Years True Heterosexual™ True Christian Provider™ award 2008 Witch Hunt Award Real American™ Ex-Mary Worshipper The Lord’s Witness Wound Tagging for Jesus Heaven Bound TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Punched the most queers Ex-Masturbator True Christian Justice of the Peace Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Home Schooled Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth Super Soaker Baptism Award Tell her once Silver Tither Gunfest '07 Christian Love Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Las Vegas Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior

 
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Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bobby-Joe will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Me again. - 10-12-2006, 02:07 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capatain View Post
Go right ahead, whippersnapper. I doubt if there's anything I could say that would impress someone so anal retentive as yourself.
How about trying to impress Jesus instead of making homersexual advances at the Godly Pastor Zeke sinner?



Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

Hot Must ReadThreads!


Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Capatain Capatain is offline
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Default Re: Me again. - 10-12-2006, 02:19 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fish View Post
There is nothing exciting in the CP trust me. I don't have access nor do I miss it.
When I registered I used a different name. Now my name and e-mail address is displayed. I didn't want my e-mail name and address displayed.
I'd like them removed, if you would be so kind or should I just bother Jesus to take care of it?
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Enobarbus Enobarbus is offline
Professor of English Landover University
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Enobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Me again. - 10-12-2006, 02:22 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capatain View Post
When I registered I used a different name. Now my name and e-mail address is displayed. I didn't want my e-mail name and address displayed.
I'd like them removed, if you would be so kind or should I just bother Jesus to take care of it?
I will change them for you, but I don't accept that you used a different name when you registered. I suspect that you have put your email where you should have put your name and vice versa.


Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Enobarbus Enobarbus is offline
Professor of English Landover University
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Posts: 3,501
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Ministering to the Liebral Godless of New Zealand
Enobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureEnobarbus has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Me again. - 10-12-2006, 02:28 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capatain View Post
When I registered I used a different name. Now my name and e-mail address is displayed. I didn't want my e-mail name and address displayed.
I'd like them removed, if you would be so kind or should I just bother Jesus to take care of it?
As a matter of fact, you seem to have put you email in both boxes. It had to be in the email box or you wouldn't have been able to register.

Like it or not, and whatever you might have intended to do, you used your email as your login name.

It is now changed to Capatain.


Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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