Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > Easter is About Jesus - Period!
Reload this Page Silly Catholics (aka my parents)
Easter is About Jesus - Period! A seasonal forum where we celebrate the true meaning of Easter. No bunnies allowed!

 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
BrotherLarry's Avatar
BrotherLarry BrotherLarry is offline
Revelationary Equine Gnathologist for Christ
True Christian™

Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian™ Ready for the Rapture Porn Resistant Persecuted One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Ex-Masturbator Friend of Jesus Gnathologist Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Stamp of Approval Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork TC Bravery True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Touched by Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Ex-Mary Worshipper Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Super Soaker Baptism Award Pastor Ezekiel Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud Team Fortress Denier

 
Posts: 2,176
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Godless New York City
BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Jesus Silly Catholics (aka my parents) - 04-20-2019, 11:37 PM

Because the LORD my GOD tells me to, I honor my father and my mother. (Exodus 20:12) But sometimes, like today, I am so ashamed of them because of their blatant ignorance of the Holy Bible and their adherence to superstition - brought on by their ridiculous commitment to the Roman Catholic Church.


This all weighed heavily on me today when Mother called to see if I could take time to go with them to the Easter Vigil service with them tonight - which begins at 11 PM. I reminded her that I am called to a ministry and Friday and Saturday nights are the best nights to lay hands on the gay community at their watering holes. I cannot imagine how performing calisthenics in the papist church could be more important than bringing more men into the fold come the Glory.


She told me that she would ask Mary to intercede for me. I was a little snappy with her when I said "There are plenty of Mary's where I'll be tonight, thank you." Thankfully Dad's favorite TV show (Family Feud) was on so he didn't try to convince me, although he is not quite as papist as mother is.


Won't you pray with me that the evil catholic demons leave them before they pass on? Mother has a clean bill of health and even though Father wasn't expected to live this long he just keeps on going, while his businesses and my inheritance remain waiting until the day I can latch onto them and make them successful and useful. And now Mother is trying to sell Mary Kay products. She looks worse than Faye Dunaway playing Joan Crawford in Mommie Dearest but that doesn't dissuade her. <sigh>


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
(#2)
Old
Dana723's Avatar
Dana723 Dana723 is offline
Forum member
Forum Member

Protected by JESUS Cleanest Kitchen True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Pro-Life Kirk Cameron Fan Club Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus

 
Posts: 642
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: Here
Dana723 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureDana723 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureDana723 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureDana723 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureDana723 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureDana723 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureDana723 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureDana723 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureDana723 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureDana723 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureDana723 has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Silly Catholics (aka my parents) - 04-21-2019, 01:37 AM

How terrible! Surely they must understand that your ministry, sent to you by God Almighty, is more important than some Catlick tradition!


Psalm 62:5-7 KJV
My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him. He only is my rock and my salvation: he is my defence;
I shall not be moved. In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God.
(#3)
Old
Isabella White's Avatar
Isabella White Isabella White is online now
True Christian™
True Christian™

Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture True Christian™ Christian Love Anti-abortion Ready for the Rapture True Christian Lady Cleanest Kitchen Trumpette True Christian Granny Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire

 
Posts: 1,411
Join Date: Mar 2019
Location: Ungodly Buffalo, NY, MAGA USA
Isabella White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Isabella White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Isabella White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Isabella White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Isabella White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Isabella White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Isabella White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Isabella White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Isabella White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Isabella White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Isabella White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Silly Catholics (aka my parents) - 04-21-2019, 01:55 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BrotherLarry View Post
Because the LORD my GOD tells me to, I honor my father and my mother. (Exodus 20:12) But sometimes, like today, I am so ashamed of them because of their blatant ignorance of the Holy Bible and their adherence to superstition - brought on by their ridiculous commitment to the Roman Catholic Church.

This all weighed heavily on me today when Mother called to see if I could take time to go with them to the Easter Vigil service with them tonight - which begins at 11 PM. I reminded her that I am called to a ministry and Friday and Saturday nights are the best nights to lay hands on the gay community at their watering holes. I cannot imagine how performing calisthenics in the papist church could be more important than bringing more men into the fold come the Glory.

She told me that she would ask Mary to intercede for me. I was a little snappy with her when I said "There are plenty of Mary's where I'll be tonight, thank you." Thankfully Dad's favorite TV show (Family Feud) was on so he didn't try to convince me, although he is not quite as papist as mother is.

Won't you pray with me that the evil catholic demons leave them before they pass on? Mother has a clean bill of health and even though Father wasn't expected to live this long he just keeps on going, while his businesses and my inheritance remain waiting until the day I can latch onto them and make them successful and useful. And now Mother is trying to sell Mary Kay products. She looks worse than Faye Dunaway playing Joan Crawford in Mommie Dearest but that doesn't dissuade her. <sigh>
Oh, dear, dear Great-Grandbaby Brother Larry: I can only imagine your upset at having your mother trying to snatch away your Saturday evening plans witnessing to the lost young men in your community. I join with you in praying that those damnable Cathyolick demons will leave your parents. And haven't we had more than enough of that ring-kissing nonsense this week, what with that Notre Dame and the setting it on fire? If there is a bit of silver lining to your predicament, it is that you can, at least, take comfort in knowing that your mother's Mary Kay pink Cadillac will one day be yours. A blessed evening to you, Dear. Sincerely, Granny Isabella


 

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2018 all rights reserved