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Default Iraq: the good news and the bad - 07-13-2007, 02:09 PM

Friends, this week we have seen glorious proof that victory in Iraq is inevitable.
Quote:
The head of US forces in Iraq, General David Petraeus, has told the BBC that fighting the insurgency is a "long term endeavour" which could take decades.

"Northern Ireland, I think, taught you that very well. My counterparts in your [British] forces really understand this kind of operation... It took a long time, decades," he said.
"I don't know whether this will be decades, but the average counter insurgency is somewhere around a nine or a 10 year endeavour."
Praise! Bearing in mind how things have got continually better under the occupation, imagine how wonderful things will look by 2013, let alone by the time we've been there for a few decades. Some liberal naysayers may claim that this war and occupation may be remembered as something less than a total triumph, but this just shows how wrong they are - after all, how could a war lasting decades end with anything less than COMPLETE VICTORY? Praise!
But of course, it's not all good news. While 99% of the population love us and intend to begin voting Republican as soon as we've weeded out the tiny minority of Shia insurgent jihadist Al-Qadea Saddam loyalists, the war against this tiny minority of Sunni extremists like Al-Sadr does have a very high human cost, and that's something we should never forget. So I'd like to propose a moment of silence in memory of Iraq's untold tragedy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Iraqi Red Crescent
[Cowardly ragheads] have limited access to health care. This was having a serious effect especially on women and children: "Pregnant women, infants and children are unable to get the required medical care and illegal abortions have become the norm," the report said.
Abortions...as the norm? Truly, there are some horrific things happening in this world today. As you sit in your God-given comfort, please, take a moment to think of the tragedy unfolding in Iraq - why, for all we know, an abortion could be happening right now. This is truly shocking stuff.

I'd be interested to hear your thoughts. In particular, I'd like to hear Brother Trent explain why, when our forces control 99.99% of the country, we've not managed to stamp this abortion menace out yet.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Iraq: the good news and the bad - 07-13-2007, 03:18 PM

I'm afraid it's a fact, Brother Temperance. Our brave fighting men and women in harm's way have tried everything they could to stop the menace of abortion in Iraq and build "a culture of life," as the President says. But the clever al Qaeda insurgents KNOW that abortion's abomination frustrates us so much that they have begun using it as a weapon almost as much as IEDs, rocket propelled grenades, or giant exploding trucks that take out mosques and marketplaces and spew limbs and body parts hundreds of feet. Just yesterday I almost tripped over half a torso running to my armored humvee.

But we are definitely turning the corner in Iraq, thanks to the fine leadership of General Petraeus. We're making good progress. The surge is working. There is light at the end of the tunnel. Iraq's biggest exports (besides oil) will soon be sunshine, lollipops and rainbows. Frowns are turning upside down. Every time it rains, it rains pennies from heaven. Everything's coming up roses. For every drop of rain that falls, a flower grows.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to remove a bloody chunk of scalp from my balcony.
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Default Re: Iraq: the good news and the bad - 07-13-2007, 03:42 PM

Praise Jesus -- the plan is working! It is refreshing to have the view of someone from the very source reporting. These so-called journalists that we hear spouting off their mouths have no idea what is happening in the midst of things. We knew going in there that it would be a many-years-long affair -- what befuddles me is these democrats who keep whining about how we need to leave! How can you leave after such a short time?


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Default Re: Iraq: the good news and the bad - 07-13-2007, 04:11 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S. View Post
We knew going in there that it would be a many-years-long affair -- what befuddles me is these democrats who keep whining about how we need to leave! How can you leave after such a short time?
Perhaps there's a connection between this and their relentless attacks upon the holy institution of marriage? Are democrats just inherently commitment-phobic?


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Iraq: the good news and the bad - 07-13-2007, 11:31 PM

Anyway, as I was saying before Iran-Queda interrupted me, staying the course in Iraq has meant that the light at the end of the tunnel is a freedom train with a carload of freedom fries and liberty toast for every smiling, well-behaved boy and girl. It almost brings a tear to my eye (I do have tears in my eyes, but that's because of the chlorine gas exposure, not because of any lack of manliness on my part.)

As for the main threats to Iraqi Freedom, abortion is an ever-present threat that requires vigilence and resolve, but the main enemy in Iraq is the same as in America: creeping homosexuality.

Iraq is more vulnerable to homosexuality for two reasons: first of all, the women are all dressed up in bee-keepers suits, and they're mostly unattractive anyway.

Secondly, the Iraqis are vulnerable to homosexual infiltration because of the attractiveness of their males. Iraqi men are by definition tall, dark and ruggedly handsome, their miscles rippling as they work, their eyes smouldering....You can literally smell their sexual energy...Despite their unmistakable air of masculinity they can be soft and gentle when desireable....And don't get me started on Iraqi boys...

Sorry, I have to go, emergency, Iran's fault, top secret, be back in a few minutes.
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Default Re: Iraq: the good news and the bad - 07-14-2007, 02:23 AM

Oh yes,that makes SO much sense - force women to have children they can't feed - anything rather than give them any freedom,why next they'll be wanting voting rights!


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