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Reload this Page Came here to apologize.
The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

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Omar al Gibberish Omar al Gibberish is offline
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Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Arrow Came here to apologize. - 05-26-2013, 01:07 PM

I came here to apologize.
Many of you will not remember me or my acts on this Godly forum some years ago.
I did deeds so unspeakable, so humiliating and inhumane that even to present day I do not believe God can forgive me.
God is by all means absolute and all present, but even for Him I have hard time to imagine forgiving burning the bible.
I was brainwashed, beaten false religion in my head.
Now I just came here to apologize and hoping that at least you can forgive blind camel banging idiot from past times.

Best regards,
Jack
(I have naturally changed my name from Omar)
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Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 05-26-2013, 01:44 PM

There is no record of you making a Love Offering© in the financial records of LBC. Are you positive you made proper amends, can you locate your receipt? Perhaps your joo accountant has it.
Now, get back in Church. It is Gods Special Day™.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 05-26-2013, 03:42 PM

The question is, have you apologized to, and begged forgiveness from Jesus Christ?

Have you accepted your guilt? Do you feel sufficiently horrified for the person you are outside of Christ? Have you given yourself to Him for all eternity? Have you prayed for Salvation©?

If not, you can do so right now if you'd like! You can say any words that come to your heart, or you can join me now. I'd be honored to pray with a sincerely repentant sinner.
Dear LORD,

I acknowledge that you, Jesus, are the Son of God. I believe that you were born of the Virgin Mary in a miraculous way (impregnating her with the Holy Spirit, which is You, without her knowledge or consent, or even the benefit of physical sperm, but by the very will of God, who is, amazingly, also You). I believe you died on the cross for my sins. I believe you were resurrected, floated up into the air, through the atmosphere, and straight to Heaven. I know that your divine nature means you were impervious to the physical effects of the lack of oxygen in space, that your divine body saved you from any danger of your blood boiling, your eyeballs exploding, or your lungs turning into red slush.

I admit that I was born a sinner by your design, and there is nothing I could have done to prevent it. I know I have led a life of sinning by not obeying your every command. It tears me up inside. My guilt is overwhelming.

Please forgive me.

Please change my heart so I can be a willing slave and do whatever you want me to do.

Please change my heart to want to read the Holy Bible and agree with all of it.

Be my Savior.

By my LORD and Master.

I beg you, save me from the very Hell you created for me in the beginning of time in case I didn't fear and obey you.

In Jesus' Name I pray.



Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 05-28-2013, 09:38 AM

Omar/Jack, I would love to believe you, but how do we know you're not a terrorist trying to gain our trust and infiltrate our church?

We may need to devise some sort of test.

Hmmm, let me think on this...


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Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 05-28-2013, 07:13 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine View Post
Omar/Jack, I would love to believe you, but how do we know you're not a terrorist trying to gain our trust and infiltrate our church?

We may need to devise some sort of test.

Hmmm, let me think on this...

Here's twelve that Omar can start with:

1. Did you read The Introduction Forum rules? Y_ N_

2. Did you provide the proper introduction according to those rules? Y_N_

3. Do you own more camels than wives? Y_ N_

4. Do you love your camels more than your wives? Y_ N_

5. If you chose Y on the last question, how many times a day? __

6. Do you typically leave your tent with dynamite strapped to your waist? Y_ N_

7. If you chose Y on the last question, how many sticks do you typically carry? __

8. Have you stoned one or more of your daughters/wives to death in the last year? Y_ N_

9. If you chose Y on the last question, how many of each? D__ W__

10. What do you call a muslim who owns a camel and a goat?
A. Bisexual
B. None of the above

11. What do you call a muslim who owns 6 goats.
A: A pimp
B: None of the above

12. When is the only time you should wink at a muslim?
A: When aiming
B: None of the above


2 Samuel 11:13 And when David had called him, he did eat and drink before him; and he made him drunk: and at even he went out to lie on his bed with the servants of his lord, but went not down to his house.
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Omar al Gibberish Omar al Gibberish is offline
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Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Omar al Gibberish is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 07-28-2021, 01:44 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
The question is, have you apologized to, and begged forgiveness from Jesus Christ?

Have you accepted your guilt?

Do you feel sufficiently horrified for the person you are outside of Christ?


Have you given yourself to Him for all eternity? Have you prayed for Salvation©?

It has been more than a decade, and I am beating myself everyday over how I behaved here.

Sometimes I wake up at night sweating and gasping for air.


What do you think is need for the Lord to forgive me for my sins committed here in 2010?
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Bible Re: Came here to apologize. - 07-28-2021, 02:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Omar al Gibberish View Post
It has been more than a decade, and I am beating myself everyday over how I behaved here.

Sometimes I wake up at night sweating and gasping for air.


What do you think is need for the Lord to forgive me for my sins committed here in 2010?
Dear Miss Gibberish: Your bouts of night sweats and the feeling of suffocation are due to the Spirit of Almighty , reminding you that there is a very high price to be paid for your terrible sins.

Matthew 10:28 "And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear which is able to destroy both soul and body in ."

You see, Dear, you cannot hide your filthy sins from the . He, and Father, know all. There is nowhere you can run to, to hide from Them.

Jeremiah 17:9 "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?"

The only way to escape the wrath of is to accept as your , repent from your sins, and open the and study along with the servants of the , here at .

Failure to do so will land you in -- for all of eternity -- which you deserve, so very surely, for being such a wretched sinner.

I do hope that you will show a willingness to learn about the Will of for your life, Dear -- here, at .




(Mrs.) Isabella White

Hebrews 10:19 "Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the of "
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Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 07-28-2021, 06:50 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Omar al Gibberish View Post
Cover your face and speak when allowed.
Is this your third intro now? One point worth considering is that posters here can generally write and don't need speech-to-text software. Hence there is no speaking involved.

Concerning your other point, have you considered God's standard? Heretics never vary mildly from The Truth, they are always diametrically opposed. Very easy to identify, in that case.

Genesis 38:14-16 She put her widow's garments off from her, and covered her with a vail, and wrapped herself, and sat in an open place ... When Judah saw her, he thought her to be an harlot because she had covered her face. And he turned unto her by the way, and said, Go to, I pray thee, let me come in unto thee ... And she said, What wilt thou give me, that thou mayest come in unto me?

She was complying with God's requirements (which do not involve anyone wearing bags over their heads) but Judah was edging out of a deal sideways or at least trying to. Although there is no divine command for the correct way to be a prostitute, there were conventions and Judah had fallen prey to the camel's nose. I hope that your Bible study is going well. Here's a good place to start:

Genesis 1:1
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Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 07-28-2021, 07:24 PM

Sincere apologies are appear in the tithe. We have yet to see yours.


Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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Eagle Re: Came here to apologize. - 07-29-2021, 12:19 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Omar al Gibberish View Post
It has been more than a decade, and I am beating myself everyday over how I behaved here.

Sometimes I wake up at night sweating and gasping for air.


What do you think is need for the Lord to forgive me for my sins committed here in 2010?
I spoke to Miss Cookie and she supplied me with any and all records of what gifts you gave to Jesus and LBC. Nada. Zilch, Zippo
I was rolling on the floor when Miss Cookie said 'Who is this clown that thinks he can joo Jesus?" I told her you were a bomb vest wearing towel head. Then we went to lunch.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 07-29-2021, 08:29 PM

Omar, would it be too much to ask you to complete the questionnaire posted by our friend Sammy just a few posts above. That would help us determine your mental state. To save your finger the effort of scrolling, I'll re-post it here for you.

Quote:
Here's twelve that Omar can start with:

1. Did you read The Introduction Forum rules? Y_ N_

2. Did you provide the proper introduction according to those rules? Y_N_

3. Do you own more camels than wives? Y_ N_

4. Do you love your camels more than your wives? Y_ N_

5. If you chose Y on the last question, how many times a day? __

6. Do you typically leave your tent with dynamite strapped to your waist? Y_ N_

7. If you chose Y on the last question, how many sticks do you typically carry? __

8. Have you stoned one or more of your daughters/wives to death in the last year? Y_ N_

9. If you chose Y on the last question, how many of each? D__ W__

10. What do you call a muslim who owns a camel and a goat?
A. Bisexual
B. None of the above

11. What do you call a muslim who owns 6 goats.
A: A pimp
B: None of the above

12. When is the only time you should wink at a muslim?
A: When aiming
B: None of the above


If I have seen further, it is by standing on the heads of others.
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Scared Re: Came here to apologize. - 07-29-2021, 10:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole View Post
Omar, would it be too much to ask you to complete the questionnaire posted by our friend Sammy just a few posts above. That would help us determine your mental state. To save your finger the effort of scrolling, I'll re-post it here for you.
Oh, Dear. One wonders if Miss Gibberish has left the building, dear Brother Dr. Toole. It appears that she comes around only every ten years or so, and then she disappears -- into the wild, blue yonder, wherever her foolish heart takes her. However, she can take heart in knowing that the servants of the , here at , will be here, to assist her, when she returns in 2033.

And, as always, we will be ready to be of service to her, to explain how she must abandon her ish sins, and how the will save her for all of eternity in Heaven, if she accepts the gift of blessed, shed .

Romans 6:23 "For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of is eternal life through our ."

Of course, everybody knows that if Miss Gibberish refuses this very generous offer of salvation, then eternal torment is her only option.

II Thessalonians 1:9 "Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the , and from the glory of power;"

Revelation 14:11 "And the smoke of their torment ascendeth up for ever and ever: and they have no rest day nor night, who worship the beast and his image, and whosoever receiveth the mark of his name."





(Mrs.) Isabella White

Hebrews 10:19 "Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the of "
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Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 07-30-2021, 02:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole View Post
Omar, would it be too much to ask you to complete the questionnaire posted by our friend Sammy just a few posts above. That would help us determine your mental state..
I'll look out for that in 2032 or 3 ish
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Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 07-30-2021, 06:29 PM

Did you blaspheme against the Holy Spirit? If so don't bother.
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Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 08-08-2021, 03:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Omar al Gibberish View Post
What do you think is need for the Lord to forgive me for my sins committed here in 2010?
How about you try to post more often than once per seven years?


Otherwise -
Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor View Post
I'll look out for that in 2032 or 3 ish
Oh, I'm sure the Rapture will happen before this heathen comes back to write another enigmatic post!
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Default Re: Came here to apologize. - 08-11-2021, 06:04 AM

Yes. I'm looking forward to it.
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