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Default Godless Catholics Try To Curse New York Yankees - 04-16-2008, 04:19 AM

It turns out that some illegal wetback day-laborer working on the new Yankee stadium decided to curse the Yankees by burying a Red Sox jersey. Apparently, the curse was going to be completed by Pope Benedryl in his "pastoral" visit to New York this week. I'm happy to report that the plain has failed.

Now, mind you, I'm not saying that the Yankees aren't already accursed. They do some good work--heck, they're the only people in New York making more money than the Jews, and that takes some skill. However, the Yanks will not be free from God's True Curse™ until they repent for the shameful way that they have failed to defend future-Hall of Fame pitcher and ardent Republican financial supporter Roger Clemens against the scurrilous charge that he used steroids and human growth hormone to get an edge.

I know what's going on there, too--the Eastern liberal elite are just trying to tear down Clemens because he struck out too many black and Hispanic batters. They can't admit that any white man is in any way the superior of the duskier races, so they assume that it had to be steroids when, in fact, his rapid bulking up resulted from good, old fashioned prayer and hard work. That's why Major League Baseball trumped up these drug charges and then tortured Andy Pettit into making a false confession on pain of being moved to DH. It's like the inquisition unleashed against that other great humanitarian pitcher, John Rocker, whose only crime was calling a spade a spade.

So, sorry Pope Benneton, but your evil scheme was foiled (as are all schemes pitting New York against jersey), but the Yankees still have some serious prayer ahead of them if they want God to cause them to win another World Series.



Pour out thy fury upon the heathen that know thee not, and upon the families that call not on thy name.... Jeremiah 10:25
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