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Default Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-04-2008, 08:48 AM

All my life, I have been a Christian. I was born and raised in a Christian home with a Christian family, and I have dedicated my life to God and His creations.

Though one thing has concerned me: furries. I am, of course, not talking about the heathen Satanic sodomite heretics that see themselves as the reincarnation of some evil homosexual dragon hell-bent on having sex with every male on Earth and in Hell. I am talking about those people who love animals (purely in a platonic way!) and dress up in suits that make them resemble anthropomorphic animals.

At first I saw furries as sickening, but as I met and spoke with one, I gradually realized, that not all of them are God-hating bastards. Just most of them.

Is this an affront to God? Is pretending to be an animal a sin? If it is, how do I repent? How can I be saved?
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-04-2008, 08:55 AM

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Originally Posted by PlasmaFox View Post
I am, of course, not talking about the heathen Satanic sodomite heretics that see themselves as the reincarnation of some evil homosexual dragon hell-bent on having sex with every male on Earth and in Hell. I am talking about those people who love animals (purely in a platonic way!) and dress up in suits that make them resemble anthropomorphic animals.

How can I be saved?
They are one and the same thing friend. Don't try fooling yourself.

Furries can NEVER enter the Kingdom of Heaven. They must have been Furry-free long before they pass over.
You must Repent of your Furry lifestyle and let Jesus enter you. Give everything over to Jesus, especially your heart.
A Loving Donation to your Favorite Baptist Church works wonders too.
Where else could you get a money-back guarantee of Salvation?



Sister Talitha

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HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-04-2008, 08:59 AM

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Originally Posted by Talitha View Post
They are one and the same thing friend. Don't try fooling yourself.
So all furries are homosexuals?
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-04-2008, 09:02 AM

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Originally Posted by PlasmaFox View Post
So all furries are homosexuals?
.................and then some!
If you do a Search of our Godly Boards you'll find out The Truth about Furries and the like.
You need to find Jesus and fast.



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HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-04-2008, 09:12 AM

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Originally Posted by Talitha View Post
.................and then some!
If you do a Search of our Godly Boards you'll find out The Truth about Furries and the like.
You need to find Jesus and fast.
I've already found Jesus. I've had him for all my life. I am no furry, I have not even thought about becoming one. As a matter of fact, my very forum name signifies their burning to death, as "Plasma" is very hot, and a "fox" is a commonly used form for the animal-lovers.
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-04-2008, 09:18 AM

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Originally Posted by PlasmaFox View Post
I've already found Jesus. I've had him for all my life. I am no furry, I have not even thought about becoming one. As a matter of fact, my very forum name signifies their burning to death, as "Plasma" is very hot, and a "fox" is a commonly used form for the animal-lovers.
In your first Post you asked how you can be Saved.

If you've been with Jesus all your life then I don't see to much of a problem.
Tell me, what Church do you attend?
Do they only use the one True King James Bible?
Do you tithe regularly?
How many children do you have?



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HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-04-2008, 09:22 AM

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Originally Posted by Talitha View Post
In your first Post you asked how you can be Saved.

If you've been with Jesus all your life then I don't see to much of a problem.
Tell me, what Church do you attend?
Do they only use the one True King James Bible?
Do you tithe regularly?
How many children do you have?
Well, either I must have worded that wrong, or you took it wrong. I meant, how can I be saved from my past association with these foul beings?

As for your questions...

The North Canton Church of Christ.
Yes, and I own -two- copies of the King James Bible.
Yes.
I don't have any... there are no True Christian girls around here... just heretic 'emo' and 'goth' devil-worshippers.
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-04-2008, 09:28 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PlasmaFox View Post
Well, either I must have worded that wrong, or you took it wrong. I meant, how can I be saved from my past association with these foul beings?

As for your questions...

The North Canton Church of Christ.
Yes, and I own -two- copies of the King James Bible.
Yes.
I don't have any... there are no True Christian girls around here... just heretic 'emo' and 'goth' devil-worshippers.
Ah yes!! Ted Blackwood, your Minister.
I think we'll have to have words. If he's allowing all these freaks to walk your streets then he's not doing his job properly.

Tell me, why haven't you been to him to help you? Why come to us?



Sister Talitha

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HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-04-2008, 09:34 AM

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Originally Posted by Talitha View Post
Ah yes!! Ted Blackwood, your Minister.
I think we'll have to have words. If he's allowing all these freaks to walk your streets then he's not doing his job properly.

Tell me, why haven't you been to him to help you? Why come to us?
I have reason to believe he actually -supports- them. There -are- groups that call themselves "Christian Furries" (more like "Homosexuals in Denial" to me). I knew that Landover Baptist Church is the only church that I can trust for the final word when it comes to these matters.
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-04-2008, 12:52 PM

Then hear this, you little pervert: God hates freaks who dress up in wierd clothes. so stop it already! Can't you just be normal?! Jesus temporarily suffered and died for our sins! show a little respect, you damned degenerate!

Quote:
I will punish ... all such as are clothed with strange apparel. -- Zephaniah 1:8


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-04-2008, 04:02 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PlasmaticFox View Post
All my life, I have been a Christian...

Though one thing has concerned me: furries...

At first I saw furries as sickening, but as I met and spoke with one, I gradually realized, that not all of them are God-hating bastards. Just most of them.

Is this an affront to God? Is pretending to be an animal a sin? If it is, how do I repent? How can I be saved?
As Sister Talitha has pointed out, your first post gives you away. You, sir, ARE a furry.

Let's look at this logically, ignoring the Bible entirely. (I know how you False Christians like to ignore the Bible, so we'll try this on your level.)

God created humans as the pinnacle of Creation, right? You want to dress up as a comic-book version of a food item or other lower being, such as a chicken or cat or Plasmatic Fox. Maybe you want to fornicate with other freaks in your fursuit, or maybe you just want to entertain and molest small children at parties.

Well listen up, Wendy!

Right off the top of my head, I can mention a "culture" that does exactly what you suggest. The Native Americans, commonly known as "American Injuns", dress up as various animals, claiming that they have animal "spirit guides". We True Christians™ know that they are being misled by demons, but they ignore our warnings.

How's that working out for them?

Judging by their situation -- crammed into tiny plots of worthless land where nothing can grow, subsisting on alcohol and insulin injections (because they're all fat drunks with diabetes), collecting welfare and generally educating themselves to the level of the average retarded -- I'd say GOD HATES INJUNS.

Why?

BECAUSE THEY ARE FURRIES.

Now, do you wish to follow their path? Do you wish to be a fat, diabetic, poverty-stricken drunk loser? Or would you rather be a True Christian™, blessed by God, and headed for Heaven?

The choice is yours, friend.


Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-05-2008, 05:55 AM

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Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
God created humans as the pinnacle of Creation, right? You want to dress up as a comic-book version of a food item or other lower being, such as a chicken or cat or Plasmatic Fox. Maybe you want to fornicate with other freaks in your fursuit, or maybe you just want to entertain and molest small children at parties.

Well listen up, Wendy!
Rev. Rodimer, are you suggesting that Wendy O. Williams is a furry?


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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-05-2008, 06:53 AM

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Originally Posted by JennyD View Post
Rev. Rodimer, are you suggesting that Wendy O. Williams is a furry?
Wendy O?

Furry?!?

I Doubt it.

I'm guessing she shaved. . . Bald!

Seems obvious, right?




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Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-05-2008, 02:13 PM

Okay, I'll bite.

Who or what is "Wendy O'Williams?" Some drunken papist here to spread venereal disease and throw Molotov cocktails at us?

SECURITY!!!


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-05-2008, 02:25 PM

Ok, wait. You mean to tell me there are REALLY people in the world that like to dress up as animals to have sex? That is *almost* as disturbing as people actually just piffleing animals.

I am a very liberal (VERY) atheist, and even I can tell you that some things are better left behind closed doors. Being a "furry" is one of them.
Also, if you REALLY think you are an x-tian and want to go to heaven, being a furry is probably a HUGE no-no.

What happened in your childhood to make you want to have beastial intercourse as an adult??
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-05-2008, 03:02 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Okay, I'll bite.

Who or what is "Wendy O'Williams?" Some drunken papist here to spread venereal disease and throw Molotov cocktails at us?

SECURITY!!!
She was an extremely ungodly punk rock singer in an awful band known as the Plasmatics. Click here Pastor for the whole tragic story. The Ladies of Landover should probably not follow the link. Wendy O. Williams was, shall we say, a woman of rather loose morals.




Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-05-2008, 03:09 PM

I wers told aboots thsi therad in skool 2 day.

i tink u shuld liten up on dese furs!

we r poepel 2!
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-05-2008, 03:12 PM

Who left the door open? The flies are coming in....


Jesus is watching you masturbate.

Nunquam concumbo dutch puellus intra clunis.

numquam futuis, puer Batavica ad te asinus praesepe
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-05-2008, 03:15 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. Fur Von Furzi View Post
I wers told aboots thsi therad in skool 2 day.

i tink u shuld liten up on dese furs!

we r poepel 2!
Oh NOES!

LOLCATZ is postin on Landover!





No, you can not has cheezburger.


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Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-05-2008, 06:00 PM

AHHHHHH

now that I have your attention...

You are wrong. You should not judge others, or groups of others. Try judging yourself, if anyone. Believe it or not, but YOU ARE NOT CLEAN. If you think you are. If you judge others, you are no christian. Mend your own ways before you tell others to. The message to me was quite clear:Furries are NOT wrong. And if I did get the wrong message, you are not to judge. That is the message I tell. That is all.


and this is to sum up this post:


<a href="http://s269.photobucket.com/albums/jj43/Weabuu/?action=view&current=YouWillFail.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i269.photobucket.com/albums/jj43/Weabuu/YouWillFail.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>



Im outta here.
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