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Default Hi from Hong Kong - 12-06-2009, 05:33 AM

Greetings to all my fellow Christians!

Allow me to briefly introduce myself. My friends call me "Free Market Fred," an appropriate name given my business in the China trade. Although the American public is hardly aware of us, it's people like me who bring you those low everyday prices at Wal-Mart. Thanks to Chinese slave labor, you can enjoy those DVD players for less than $30. Of course, most consumers would cry if they knew that I buy them for $5, but don't forget how hard I work for my profits! Plus I have to suffer the horrors of living here in Hong Kong, a crowded city populated almost entirely by heathen Chinks. Thank The Lord for my chauffeur-driven limousine, or else I'd have to mingle with them on the buses and subway, exposing myself to Asian diseases that would turn my skin yellow and I'd wind up looking like the sickly locals.

Of course, to do my job, I sometimes have to leave the comforts of my penthouse apartment, and even make trips across the border into China itself, a barbaric country that we should have nuked long ago. On the other hand, China is kind of useful to America, and not just for the cheap labor. For example, it's great that all the factory effluent gets dumped into their rivers rather than ours, and that the toxic smoke is inhaled by them, rather than us. I just worry that some of that stuff drifts into Hong Kong where I live - that's why I've installed filters on all the windows. Breathing that Chink air - hey, no wonder you never see birds over there. I'm suspicious of the water too, so I buy imported Perrier by the container-load - I even use it for bathing and doing my laundry.

I'm really glad to discover this forum. I get kind of lonely over here, though I do see some of my fellow Americans on occasion, heading to China to get organ transplants (that gulag has it's upside). Of course, I don't really have much time to socialize - I'm especially busy this time of year exporting all those Christmas toys. We've also had some problem lately with striking workers, if you can believe it - thank the Lord for those child and prison laborers, or I don't know how we'd fill our orders at a reasonable cost.

Anyway, I'm always willing to help my fellow Christians. Let me know if any of you are interested in buying a Chink kid for adoption - I got a friend who knows just where to get them, and you don't have to worry about the kid's parents kicking up a fuss. If any of those slants start getting uppity, I'm sure we can arrange for them to become the next organ donor, if you know what I mean.

Praise Jesus, and keep up the good work spreading the word of The Lord.

Brother Fred
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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-06-2009, 07:52 AM

Welcome! Great to see another member of the international business community on the forum. We need to meet for a tax-deductable 3 martini lunch. I'm the flag importation business myself.



Isn't it great how China's flexible workforce is making it possible for Americans to be more and more patriotic?
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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-06-2009, 09:13 AM

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Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond View Post
Welcome! Great to see another member of the international business community on the forum. We need to meet for a tax-deductable 3 martini lunch. I'm the flag importation business myself.



Isn't it great how China's flexible workforce is making it possible for Americans to be more and more patriotic?
Hi Brother Jeb!

Great to hear from a fellow Christian, especially an importer. I'll be sure to send you a catalog of our products, though in truth I hardly need to since we can get just about anything you want. If you know anyone who needs a heart or liver transplant, just drop me an email.

But about American flags. It's been tricky. Seems that those liberals are making a lot of noise about "Made in China" American flags. Ah, but my company has got a solution to that too. We can also source products made in Saipan. Since Saipan is a US territory with none of the inconvenient labor and immigration laws, we can offer very low-cost Chinese labor AND a "made in USA" label on our American flags. Hats off to lobbyist Jack Abramoff and former House Majority Whip Tom DeLay for the great legislation that permits us to do this! Obviously, only the Republican Party understand the needs of big corporations.

I just fear that Marxist Obama will ruin everything. Just look at the way the stock market crashed even before he got elected. Imagine how bad it's going to crash again soon if he's permitted to serve the full four years. The market is rallying now only thanks to the hope that Osambo will be impeached for being a Kenyan citizen, and Sarah Palin will be appointed our next president by the conservative Supreme Court.

Praise Jesus! Praise credit default swaps!
Brother Fred
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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-06-2009, 11:45 AM

Saipan! That's some brilliant thinking.All the inflexible people jumped off the cliffs during WW2, leaving just those who go with the free market flow. God put those cliffs there for a reason!

But then, democrats are too unpatriotic to buy American flags, so the "made in China" label is not a problem.

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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-06-2009, 02:08 PM

About how much is a chink kid going to cost? I might be interested in adopting a 14-18 year old female. There is nothing I would like more than saving one of those heathens from their false religion and turning them into a servant for the Lord.
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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-07-2009, 12:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Snerdly View Post
About how much is a chink kid going to cost? I might be interested in adopting a 14-18 year old female. There is nothing I would like more than saving one of those heathens from their false religion and turning them into a servant for the Lord.
I'll give you a tip - you'll get even better prices down in Cambodia. Figure about $150 for full ownership, though you can rent her first for a few days - always wise to take a test drive, if you know what I mean. Shell out a few more dollars to get her tested for disease - believe me, it's worth it.

Praise the Lord!
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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-07-2009, 01:55 PM

I see nothing but up-sides for us by welcoming FMF to our Godly™ community.

Rather than paying WalMart's ripoff prices for the DVD players, perhaps Fred can get us a group buy on them. I'm thinking here of maybe 15 bucks a pop. Fred triples his money and we split the FedEx charge. Win-Win.


On another note:

I would hope that those of us thinking of importing young house maids encourage Fred to ship only females and that he report to the DoF anyone inquiring about importing boys.


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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-07-2009, 08:30 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Free Market Fred View Post
I'll give you a tip - you'll get even better prices down in Cambodia. Figure about $150 for full ownership, though you can rent her first for a few days - always wise to take a test drive, if you know what I mean. Shell out a few more dollars to get her tested for disease - believe me, it's worth it.

Praise the Lord!
Brother Fred
Your sick, I hope you know that.


Please, I gave up dollies months ago.
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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-07-2009, 08:38 PM

Praise Jesus for bringing you to this forum brother!


Upon the wicked he shall rain snares, fire and brimstone, and an horrible tempest: this shall be the portion of their cup. (Psalm 11:6)

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DEATH PENALTY FOR FAGS

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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-07-2009, 09:27 PM

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Originally Posted by lrbailey View Post
Your sick, I hope you know that.
I'm guessing you meant "you're" sick.

Obviously not the product of Christian-based home schooling.

May your Unsaved Trash status be long and painful as you spend your time playing with your dollies, pervert.


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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-07-2009, 11:43 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Free Market Fred View Post
I'll give you a tip - you'll get even better prices down in Cambodia. Figure about $150 for full ownership, though you can rent her first for a few days - always wise to take a test drive, if you know what I mean. Shell out a few more dollars to get her tested for disease - believe me, it's worth it.

Praise the Lord!
Brother Fred
That sounds quite resonable. At that price, I would consider getting a couple or three of them. Although I would suspect that the total cost would be considerably higher, considering shipping and handling. Even then, I don't think it would be cost prohibitive. And of course, when you are doing the Lord's work, what is money.

I just got to thinking, you are are an importer of goods from the orient. What would it cost if we could get several hundred of these girls, delivered to Freehold? I would bet you that there are many more on this forum just like me that would like nothing more than to give these girls a chance at knowing the Lord. Please give an estimate, based upon a minimum of 200 girls delivered. I think I should also add that they should be certified free of disease. I know this would cost more, but in your own words, it is worth it.

Praise the Lord! Praise Jesus! Glory to God!
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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-07-2009, 11:57 PM

Mr. Snerdly, for Unsaved Trash you post an interesting proposition. I predict a promising future for you here.


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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-08-2009, 12:26 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by lrbailey View Post
Your sick, I hope you know that.
You're right - it's sick to waste money, and $150 is more than you need to pay. But if followed by link to Cambodia and read the article, you'd know that you can get a dark-skinned girl for only $70. Hey, might as well get two for $140.

I do realize that Cambodia is a long way for most of you to travel. It's convenient for me because I live in Hong Kong. It's only a two-hour flight from here, and I can zip down there on weekends in my corporate jet. But if you're in the USA, you might want to check out the Dominican Republic. Prices might be higher than Cambodia, but it's a much shorter commute, so you'll save a bundle on refueling the LearJet.

Praise the Lord!
Brother Fred
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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-08-2009, 12:30 AM

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Originally Posted by HTannor View Post
Mr. Snerdly, for Unsaved Trash you post an interesting proposition. I predict a promising future for you here.
Brother Tannor, I cannot express in mere words what this means to me. It only makes me more devout in the following of the Lord Jesus Christ. I will do my level best to become a respected member of this forum.

Glory to God!
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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 12-08-2009, 07:37 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Snerdly View Post
Please give an estimate, based upon a minimum of 200 girls delivered.
When I was a kid, I'd often pile my plate with more food than I could eat, and my mom would say "your eyes are bigger than your stomach". Substitute for another body part and you'll know what I mean.
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Default Re: Hi from Hong Kong - 10-09-2010, 02:45 AM

Hey there, Brother in Christ. Really enjoy and appreciate your approach to life. Travel Asia occasionally for business myself so might just have to meet up sometime and figure out more ways to convert those heathens to the Right Way. And we can enjoy our cigars together while serving Him! Maybe even on the Lear, eh?!
Mike
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