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Default How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 05:05 AM

As we all know, God tests us all. Take for example, Abraham.

God tested Abraham by ordering him to perform a human sacrifice:

Quote:
Then God said, "Take your son, your only son, Isaac, whom you love, and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains I will tell you about."
Gen 22:2
Abraham, being a Godly man and fully subscribing to the Christian doctrine of Divine Command Theory of Ethics (anything that God orders you to do is moral, even if it would normally be immoral) he follows God's orders. He comes this close to killing his son before God tells him it was just a test:

Quote:
"Do not lay a hand on the boy," he said. "Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son."
Gen 22:12
Reading this passage again made me think... how should I prepare to sacrifice one of my own children? I have 7 kids from three ex-wives and I love them all dearly. But, if God whispered in my brain to kill them all, I would have to do it. Following God's orders is more important than anything else. (This is why those whom are called by God to kill abortionists are so happy in jail... They heard God tell them to kill and they followed orders without question.) So, I have two questions:

1) How can I strengthen myself for this possible test?

2) Are there any countries where this might not be against secular law? If there is not, that is OK...God's orders will be carried out. But if there IS, that would be a relief.

To be clear, I have not heard from God on this YET. I am just worried that I might and I want to be prepared.

I look forward to your input!


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.

Last edited by Gabriel Reproba; 01-08-2011 at 05:48 PM.
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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 05:07 AM

Ignoring the fact that this type of absurdatiy practically proves that the Bible is bronze-age mythology with no divine connection, let me ask you something in return:

If God is omniscient and omnipotent, why did he need to test Abraham? (Or Job? Or ANYONE for that matter?) He should already know what they would do without torturing these people! he would have known it from the instant he considered creating the universe, in fact.

Your own scripture shows that your "God" doesn't even KNOW that Abraham fears God until Abraham is about to murder his own son:
Quote:
"Do not lay a hand on the boy," he said. "Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son."
Gen 22:12
If this is true and God can not see into Abraham's heart, then all God is basing his conclusion on is Abraham's outward actions...something that can be manipulated for deception. Something to ponder while you continue to worship this sadistic monster.


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Thumbs up Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 09:01 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabriel Reproba View Post
To be clear, I have not heard from God on this YET. I am just worried that I might and I want to be prepared.
there no needs to be worrieds, Mr.Reproba. i gonna prays that lord God let you wiggles thru a liddle loophole, an that loophole be your childrens be killeds by provings thier faith to a unsaved persons . if you teech them to says the rite thang like how Mr.Baldwin done, then you not gonna have to kills them yourselfs. i not no what denominashun Mr.Baldwin be i prays he not a catlick , but his hart be in the rite place anyways, yay! .

Quote:
STEPHEN BALDWIN takes his faith so seriously, he'd watch his own daughter die in the name of religion.
The actor reinvented himself as a born-again Christian following the 9/11 terrorist attacks on America, and his wife Kennya and their kids Alaia and Hailey are equally as devoted.
During a candid chat on U.K. reality show Celebrity Big Brother, Baldwin revealed the lengths he would go to to stay true to his belief in God.
He explained, "I'm gonna sound fanatical right now but what my faith requires is if I were sitting here, and my wife and two kids were sitting there, and we were on a public bus and somebody came in with a machine gun and pointed it at my daughter and said to my daughter, 'Say Jesus doesn't exist' - if she turned to me and said, 'What do I do?', I'd say, 'What have I taught you to do?'
"She'd say, 'Jesus absolutely exists', and I'd see her in heaven."
i gots that from this here unsaved site please forgives me
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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 09:12 AM

Brother Gabriel,

Before you sacrifice your kid, perhaps you should consider a sale instead? I know the kid is white, but how old? He or a she? Eye and hair color as well as general appearance and health all determine your asking price.

Send me a photo and other relevant details - I'll run it through my Excel worksheet and give you a price estimate. Thanks to Craigslist and eBay, you should get an offer pretty quick.

Praise Jesus!
Brother Fred


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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 02:53 PM

I appreciate your responses.

Petal: That is an uplifting story about what it means to be a True Christian™. I hope Mr. Baldwin chose the right path to salvation! I would hate to have him encourage a maniac to machine gun his child only to end up meeting her in Hell and not in Heaven.

FMF: You and your amazing spreadsheets! Have you thought about my proposal to comercialize them yet? I could draw up the papers very quickly and I think we could out-do the Video Professor in net profit within 9-12 months! That said, and as I stated in my OP, God has not instructed to kill my child or children yet. Nor has he instructed me to sell them yet. If I do hear from God on this matter and if he goes the capitalist route, i will of course come calling!

Anyone else have any suggestions?


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 03:22 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabriel Reproba View Post
I appreciate your responses.

Petal: That is an uplifting story about what it means to be a True Christian™. I hope Mr. Baldwin chose the right path to salvation! I would hate to have him encourage a maniac to machine gun his child only to end up meeting her in Hell and not in Heaven.

FMF: You and your amazing spreadsheets! Have you thought about my proposal to comercialize them yet? I could draw up the papers very quickly and I think we could out-do the Video Professor in net profit within 9-12 months! That said, and as I stated in my OP, God has not instructed to kill my child or children yet. Nor has he instructed me to sell them yet. If I do hear from God on this matter and if he goes the capitalist route, i will of course come calling!

Anyone else have any suggestions?
You should look for a country that the government grants it's citizens the right to take responsibility for their lives. Somalia a good choice. The reason America is going to hell in handbasket because the nanny state tries to stop us from raising our kids like God wants us to.



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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 06:59 PM

I don't see the problem here. If you properly raised your kids they will go straight to Heaven. So sacrificing them, provided the LORD asks you to, only has great advantages.

And you can start practicing for it by using your gun to kill some animals. I always aim for the head so they don't suffer.


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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 07:20 PM

This practice is common amonst the tribesmen in my homeland. Because they were God less I looked at thier acts as satanic and foolish. But if God commands such actions then who are we to argue?
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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 07:24 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ArmLegLegArmHead View Post
But if God commands such actions then who are we to argue?
Agreed, as soon as God commands it I will start shooting my kids.


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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 07:26 PM

Like so many hypothetical questions, Brother Gabe, this one's fraught with the false urgency of speculation. If you'd just turn to "ol' reliable" -- your KJV1611 Bible -- you'd realize that Father God has already provided the perfect model for child sacrifice, inasmuch as Jesus was His only begotten Son.

What you'll need is the following: A sturdy crucifix, a hill, and an expatriate band of none-too-bright Italians to carry things out. Matters of local ordinance hardly matter.


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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 07:27 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
Agreed, as soon as God commands it I will start shooting my kids.
Amen, Brother

It's VERY logical: if you shoot your kids when God asks you to, then one of two things will happen:
  • God will intervene at exactly the right moment by e.g. jamming your gun or something else
  • God will allow the killing to go through, but reserve an extra special place for you and your family in Heaven
Seems like a win either way...


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Matthew 7:23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.

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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 07:34 PM

A good old burning alive would do the deed, as your children should have the opportunity to realize that they will go to heaven and that they should prepare for their arrival.
It is a slow death, but gives god the chance to intervene and command you to stop.
Doesn't the biblical story show that god just wanted to test the faith and not to kill the child? If you where to blow your children's heads off with a gun there would be no second chances for intervention.
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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 07:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MarkHenry View Post
A good old burning alive would do the deed, as your children should have the opportunity to realize that they will go to heaven and that they should prepare for their arrival.
It is a slow death
Sounds like torture to me. If I have to kill someone, I will do it fast. Unless God provides specific instructions for the sacrifice of course, then I would follow those instructions.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MarkHenry View Post
If you where to blow your children's heads off with a gun there would be no second chances for intervention.
I assure you God can be faster than a speeding bullet.

But I think all this is wishful thinking, if God demands you sacrifice your children I highly doubt he will undo that the very last moment. And why would He, they would go straight to Heaven anyway.


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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 07:45 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MarkHenry View Post
but gives God the ...Biblical story show that God just...
Mind the caps, friend. You would not want to accidentally insult God while saying otherwise sensible things


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Matthew 7:22
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Matthew 7:23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.

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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 07:57 PM

Genesis 22:9
When they came to the place of which God had told him, Abraham built the altar there and laid the wood in order and bound Isaac his son and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood. Then Abraham reached out his hand and took the knife to slaughter his son.



So in fact you have to cut your children up before you burn them. Sorry my mistake. It is written in the bible, and what better role models do you have than the biblical ones. I just wanted to show that the bible offers the answers to your every questions.

Also if you want to kill quickly with a knife you can always stab from the side into the heart, bloodloss enshures that you black out. Also a good method is to stab from behind the ear into the head or cutting the throat so that blood does not flow to the brain. A trained butcher can kill instantly like this.
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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 08:01 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MarkHenry View Post
So in fact you have to cut your children up before you burn them. Sorry my mistake. It is written in the bible, and what better role models do you have than the biblical ones. I just wanted to show that the bible offers the answers to your every questions.
God is creative, I have no doubt he can thing of more than one way to sacrifice kids.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MarkHenry View Post
Also if you want to kill quickly with a knife you can always stab from the side into the heart, bloodloss enshures that you black out. Also a good method is to stab from behind the ear into the head or cutting the throat so that blood does not flow to the brain. A trained butcher can kill instantly like this.
Stabbing up straight in the heart is also very effective.


CANCER is a state of mind! Time to stop ALL healthcare!!!
Follow me on Twitter or burn in Hell for all eternity!

To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 10:50 PM

Thank you all for your insight. I feel better prepared should I receive a green light from Jesus.


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-25-2010, 10:53 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabriel Reproba View Post
Thank you all for your insight. I feel better prepared should I receive a green light from Jesus.
Faith like yours is inspiring Brother Reproba. I am sure you kids are proud to have a loving father like you.



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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-26-2010, 01:47 AM

I just want to add that if you decide to go ahead and shoot the kids, be sure to first take out a good life insurance policy on them. Also, give a little thought as to whom you're going to frame for the murder (any negroes live in your neighborhood?).

Praise Jesus!
Brother Fred


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Default Re: How Should I Prepare to Sacrifice My Child? - 01-26-2010, 06:05 AM

hehe! FMF is always the kidder! Of course I would not frame anyone, since that would involve bearing false witness against someone, but I get your point, Brother Fred. If God calls on me to sacrifice my children (one of them or all of them) I will speak to you first!


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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