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  • Catholics get one right: Anti-gay petition

    Imagine my surprise and pleasure at seeing this article, describing the Catholic cult's latest attempt to ban homosexuals:

    The Vatican is hoping to use the average teenager's natural fear of being called gay to increase signatures on their petition opposing a law which will allow adults to be [homosexual].

    Archbishop Vincent Nichols said: "Teachers will tell pupils that any pen that hasn't signed the gay marriage petition is a gay pen. And we all know who uses gay pens, don't we?

    "After that, it's a matter of personal conscience how the teachers proceed . . . This method will only work on male pupils, but the girls will just know their place and do as they're told."

    Any pupil refusing to sign will be ignored by staff, on the grounds that they cannot understand them because they do not speak 'Poovish'.

    The pupils will also be excluded from after-school activities until they hand in their Gay Card.

    Staff at Catholic junior schools will take a more sensitive approach by telling the children that bad people want to kill their mummy and replace her with a big hairy man who hates the Baby Jesus.
    Granted, the Catholic schools teach paganism and idolatry, but at least in this case, they've gotten it right.

    (Even a broken clock is right twice a day . . .)
    Bible boring? Nonsense!
    Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
    You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

  • #2
    Re: Catholics get one right: Anti-gay petition

    Certainly there are no gay pens in my home!

    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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    • #3
      Re: Catholics get one right: Anti-gay petition

      Gay pen - that'd be one like this right?

      Genesis 7:5
      And Noah did according unto all that the LORD commanded him.


      John 8:32
      And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.


      sigpic

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      • #4
        Re: Catholics get one right: Anti-gay petition

        I have it on good authority that half the monks wear pink lacy panties under their robes.
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

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        • #5
          Re: Catholics get one right: Anti-gay petition

          Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
          I have it on good authority that half the monks wear pink lacy panties under their robes.
          Hence the ready supply of gay pens.
          Bible boring? Nonsense!
          Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
          You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Catholics get one right: Anti-gay petition

            I have been informed that the "Daily Mash" is a parody site.

            But that the story is based on an actual petition, so my comments are still valid.

            The Catholic Education Service (CES) has written to every state-funded Catholic secondary school in England and Wales and asked them to urge pupils to sign a petition against gay marriage, it has been reported today in PinkNews.co.uk. The British Humanist Association (BHA) has branded the revelation as ‘absolutely outrageous’, and believes that, if accurate, the CES has likely broken multiple laws in pushing such a petition in pupils.


            Last month, the CES wrote to all Catholic secondary schools and asked them to draw attention to a letter against gay marriage from the Archbishops of Westminster and Southwark which was read out at Sunday Mass on 11 March. The CES also asked schools to ‘draw attention’ to pupils as young as 11, a petition against gay marriage from the Coalition for Marriage.


            Pink News’s article highlights that the CES’s actions likely broke the Equality Act 2010, which prohibits discrimination against pupils based on their sexual orientation. The BHA believe the CES’s actions likely also break sections 406-7 of the Education Act 1996, which forbids ‘the promotion of partisan political views in the teaching of any subject in the school’, and requires balanced treatment of political issues. This law was successfully used in 2007 to stop schools showing Al Gore’s climate change film, An Inconvenient Truth, without also explaining scientific errors in the film.
            At least the law has been used for something positive in the past. But now the opposite edge of the sword will do the cutting.
            Bible boring? Nonsense!
            Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
            You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

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