The Pillsbury Doughboy/Breakfast Cereal

[Old Man Hatchet]

The Pillsbury Doughboy, or Poppin' Fresh, has much to giggle about. Over the decades he has turned scores of decent American boys into depraved sodomites. He has made batch after batch of homosexuals for his master, Satan, and his secret ingredient is parental apathy.



No one can refute that the Doughboy is gay. His dainty little scarf, the effeminate way he swivels his hips, his girly voice--all of this makes him the most conspicuously gay icon in the history of advertising. He makes Little Debbie look like the Marlboro Man. In the seventies, advertising geniuses gave him a wife, Poppie. The idea was so laughable that Poppie was dropped quicker than a Negro's trousers when he has a white woman alone.



It's obvious the makers of Pillsbury products have a homosexual agenda even without taking their mascot into account. Their packaging is disturbingly phallic. They are as obsessed with tallywackers as Georgia O'Keeffe was with cooters.



Friends, I don't know what the name "Poppin' Fresh" means. It is probably gay slang, and it more than likely has something to do with the anus. I do know that at the end of Pillsbury Doughboy commercials, the little homer is typically poked with a giant finger, another phallic symbol.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?do...arch&plindex=6

Brothers and Sisters of Christ, keep this insiduous product far from your homes. Don't let the Doughboy's next victim be your child.

[Deaner]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-7497869480821326929&q=pillsbury+doughboy&total=400&start=0&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=6

There's absolutely no doubt he's a fat little queer; that "Funfetti" in the commercial was rainbow colored.

[Brother V]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

So very true brother.

Looking through all the Pillsbury products, I don't see any that are unleavened.

Matthew 16:6 Then Jesus said unto them, Take heed and beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and of the Sadducees.

And of poppin' fresh!

YIC
V

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

Well observed, Brothers. Also note the sly use of product placement to reinforce their homosexual agenda:



How many children have hankered for weiners--particularly those belonging to boys named Nathan--after seeing this advertisement? I urge all True Christians™ to boycott stores where Pillsbury products and Nathan's Beef Franks are sold.

[lord warrior]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

How bout there " hot,fresh cinnamon buns", if that ain't a refferance for for sodomy than what is?

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

How bout there " hot,fresh cinnamon buns", if that ain't a refferance for for sodomy than what is?

My wife calls me "hot buns." Are you suggesting she wants to sodomize me?

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

These lurid boxer shorts make me sick. Notice the proximity of the Doughboy to the groin area and how he positions his backside towards it. You can be certain that something is poppin' up under that perverted little homer's apron.

[Mr. Jingles]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

These lurid boxer shorts make me sick. Notice the proximity of the Doughboy to the groin area and how he positions his backside towards it. You can be certain that something is poppin' up under that perverted little homer's apron.

Those are what I call 'Barney Frank ' shorts. If you think Pillsbury's
homer campaign is bad, Oscar Meyer may be worse. Have you EVER hear anything gayer than 'Oh, I Wish I Were An Oxcar Meyer Weiner?' I overheard my nephew singing that Satanic jingle once; it's amazing he survived the savage beating he received from me.

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

Have you EVER hear anything gayer than 'Oh, I Wish I Were An Oxcar Meyer Weiner?'

That is indeed gay. There is much that is homoerotic in the advertising world. I still believe Poppin' Fresh wins for being the most gay, but Snuggle Bear gives him a run for his money. You be the judge:



http://www.evtv1.com/player.aspx?itemnum=8137


http://www.evtv1.com/player.aspx?itemnum=8093

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

That is such a vile disgusting image that it leaves me speechless, Brother Hatchet. The home made cinnamon buns my mother made growing up never had suggestive icing dripping like that during my youth.

Vance Packard ("The Hidden Persuaders") had stern warnings over a half-century ago that no one paid any attention to. Now we see the results as our nation slowly declines into depravity. The present "MySpace" generation is no longer interested in killing mooselimbs and defending our country to the threat of terror. Thanks to Pillsbury their "MySpace" is now centered in their anal cavities with their "fun buns" recreation.

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

That is such a vile disgusting image that it leaves me speechless, Brother Hatchet. The home made cinnamon buns my mother made growing up never had suggestive icing dripping like that during my youth.

Vance Packard ("The Hidden Persuaders") had stern warnings over a half-century ago that no one paid any attention to. Now we see the results as our nation slowly declines into depravity. The present "MySpace" generation is no longer interested in killing mooselimbs and defending our country to the threat of terror. Thanks to Pillsbury their "MySpace" is now centered in their anal cavities with their "fun buns" recreation.

I share your indignation, Brother Bryan. Now, whom do you consider to be more gay: the Rice Krispies or Keebler Elves?

__________

I'm in the midst of listing all of the advertising mascots I find offensive, and I'm not sure which deserves the slightly higher ranking. Either way, they are going right before Charlie the Tuna and just after the Vlasic Stork.

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

I share your indignation, Brother Bryan. Now, whom do you consider to be more gay: the Rice Krispies or Keebler Elves?

....
I'm in the midst of listing all of the advertising mascots I find offensive, and I'm not sure which deserves the slightly higher ranking. Either way, they are going right before Charlie the Tuna and just after the Vlasic Stork.

You present a bit of a conundrum, Brother Hatchet. I have a hard time assessing the level of fagotry between the Rice Krispies and Keebler Elves. One thing for certain, they both have contributed to debasing the public taste. We now have a reality TV show based on the perverse exploits of a family of dwarfs. They are all homers, I dare say.

I have always felt that Charlie Tuna presented a false Kantian dichotomy between "good taste" and "tasting good", leading to an instant oral gratification fixation in our culture. This has recently expressed itself in the bathroom toe-tapping headlines in Minnesota. People seem to be visiting that bathroom stall as if it were some sort of religious shrine.

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

You present a bit of a conundrum, Brother Hatchet. I have a hard time assessing the level of fagotry between the Rice Krispies and Keebler Elves.

Indeed. They are like the Olsen twins: equally reprehensible and wholly indistinguishable.

I have always felt that Charlie Tuna presented a false Kantian dichotomy between "good taste" and "tasting good", leading to an instant oral gratification fixation in our culture.

Speaking of indistinguishable, I scribbled some notes next to my entry of Charlie the Tuna on my list, and they read, word for word, as you wrote above. We are both clearly inspired by the Holy Spirit, my fellow Brother-in-Christ.

[Marshall]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

Overtly homosexual food makes Jesus puke. This is almost as bad as "Tootsie Rolls" and "Tootsie Pops". Obviously Negroid in nature and definitely phallic. Imagine your kids sucking on these brown things!

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: The Pillsbury Doughboy

....We are both clearly inspired by the Holy Spirit, my fellow Brother-in-Christ.

Yes Brother, the power of the Lord is with us. Jesus sent a wake-up call to the only "normal" member of that family of heathen homer dwarves by bashing him in the head:

http://www.tvgasm.com/newsgasm/news/industry/newsgasm-little-reality-star-n.php

Nine-year-old Jacob Roloff, a full-size boy whose parents and older brother are dwarves, underwent surgery for a dented skull after a 25-foot medieval trebuchet (or catapult) misfired on the family farm over the weekend. Viewers of the TLC series might remember back in April when the family built the 25-foot wooden war weapon for the cameras.

The catapult is used to hurl pumpkins, not dwarves (this is TLC, not Fox, after all).

Jacob was cocking the Pythonesque device when its 2000-pound counterweight slammed into his head and repeatedly smashed into Mike Detjen, a local engineer who was loading the contraption. Mike needed 200 stitches.

Jesus is also warning the unsaved about celebrating the upcoming Haloween.

Glory!