Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

[Jesus]

I will never forget that day 2013 years ago when I was born from a virgin.

You know my family had to flee Bethlehem because Herod wanted to murder me. But of course we decided to stop at the temple in Jerusalem so my mom and stepfather could dedicate me.

Feel free to ask me any questions you may have. Since it is my birthday, I will answer you.

[Attila's Wife]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

Beloved

This is more of a prayer than a question, but may I beg you to forgive Brother Wide-Open for whatever it was he did that caused this to happen on this, the Holiest of all days?

Also, if I may be permitted a simple question, what is your favourite pie?

Yours in Thee,
Attila's Wife

[Jesus]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

Blueberry. They match my eyes.

Next.

[worthlessdavid]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

I will never forget that day 2013 years ago when I was born from a virgin.

You know my family had to flee Bethlehem because Herod wanted to murder me. But of course we decided to stop at the temple in Jerusalem so my mom and stepfather could dedicate me.

Feel free to ask me any questions you may have. Since it is my birthday, I will answer you.

I am wondering, did you make hell infinitely painful?

Also i am wondering why I have poor eye sight?.

1 more thing I don't want to forget John 4:1-3 and 1 Thessalonians 5:21 , I don't want to mistakenly praise someone other than God.

[Chester Longshire]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

Blueberry. They match my eyes.

Next.

Dear LORD,

Did Elvis make it in?

I could not imagine heaven without getting live performances of "Jail House Rock."

[Naomi Ruth Lamb]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

A Frenchman, a Mormon, a Swede, A Canadian, a Messican, and Vanna White are in a plane crash. Who survives? We all know that there is nothing in the entire creation that is great and powerful as You. Why did you give Adam Levine acne? World peace is on everyone's mind. With a wink of Your lovely blue eye, You could bring peace. So, what's up with giving us the Kardashians? Wouldn't their elimination be a good first step toward a perfect world? How are Mary and Joseph? Does Your Mother despise Catholics, waking her at all hours of the night with their Hail Marys and Holy Queens? And has burying a statue of St. Joseph ever really caused a house to sell? Does Your Father have a favorite Wizard of Oz character?

[Mrs. Paddy McIrish]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

Dearest Almighty,

If it please You, my King of Kings, the Lion, the Lamb, the Redeemer of all sinners, the truest Love of my heart, Keeper of my soul ... will Mr. McIrish and I finally be blessed with a Soldier of You of our very own unlike those six abominations from his heathen whore of an ex-wife who had the temerity to flout Your curse of infertility and involved secular scientists to conceive said monsters outside of her womb in a most arrogant and blasphemous fashion?

I would love nothing more than to present my dear husband with a REAL baby boy, born to serve YOU!

With Humble Thanks and Ebullient Praise
Mrs. Paddy McIrish

[Jesus]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

I am wondering, did you make hell infinitely painful?

Yes, of course.

Also i am wondering why I have poor eye sight?.

Because of your sins. Your masturbation makes me sick.

1 more thing I don't want to forget John 4:1-3 and 1 Thessalonians 5:21 , I don't want to mistakenly praise someone other than God.

Because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.

You are truly blessed.

[Jesus]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

Did Elvis make it in?

Don't be silly. Elvis had his reward on the earth. However, it did take two of my angels to throw that glutton into hell.

[Jesus]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

If it please You, my King of Kings, the Lion, the Lamb, the Redeemer of all sinners, the truest Love of my heart, Keeper of my soul ... will Mr. McIrish and I finally be blessed with a Soldier of You of our very own.

Yes, no or wait; is my answer. Maybe you should pray harder and I'll think more about it.

[Mark L. Snyde, PhD]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

Dear Jesus, My Magnificent Manly Messiah,

How does gravity work?

[Mrs. Paddy McIrish]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

Yes, no or wait; is my answer. Maybe you should pray harder and I'll think more about it.

Your whim is my command, O Mighty One. I will wear my knees out for You, hungrily waiting to receive Your Spirit as well as Your answer to my prayers.

P.S. I hope You had the most Blessed of Birthdays! Did You get everything You wanted?

[worthlessdavid]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

Yes, of course.



Because of your sins. Your masturbation makes me sick.



Because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.

You are truly blessed.

Well then for your birthday I will stop sinning (you might have to help me with that one)

You seem to know that I already believed. (hopefully if you are god you can at least be glad I was being cautious, because God is a jealous God)

[Bjorn Jensen]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

Just to have it confirmed once and for all: what is your views on homosexuality?

[arthur frayn]

Re: Hi again, gang. It is my birthday. Ask me anything.

What was the deal with YOU & satan & that schmuck Job??