[MitzaLizalor]

Re: My uncle gave me a pearl necklace!

Oh Father help me, I have had it with burning these keyboards. Three or four more and it may just cut into my monthly tithing. This is getting ridiculous!

Thank you for the tip, Felicity. And thank you Catherine for further proof that all men should be giving the women in their life as many pearl necklaces that he can produce, depending on his standing as a man.

Glory be to Him!

This (and similar) products are available to suit a range of keyboards and are very popular in the Landover rehabilitation homes where they prove effective against demons. (illustration shows efficacy during poltergeist activity)

[H.Evansta-Betsy]

May I help?

Seeing as I am, being a terrifying mix of Roma, Presbyterianisterite, Belgianerista and English non-homamahexualist-hating CofE and four stringed musicalist, I am guaranteed VIP entry backstage into Satan's backrow lineup, perhaps I could help all you God fearing ladies?


Rather than you take such shame and sin from the men in your lives, send your errant spouses, uncles and other menfolk to me - allow me to assist the men in unloading their heavy burdens upon my person and I shall therefore take my punishment knowing that I have at least protected some good and godly souls from my neverending torture at a ten thousand year long jamming session with other sinners, such as Elvis and his gluttony, John Lennon and his hippy ways, Waylon Jennings and everything, Phil Lynott, all those sinners I shall be forced to play bass for as my eternal punishment.

Of course, if you were to suggest that, along with the mighty beads adorning my personage, your men were to free you by placing gold, the threads for braids, the fine clothes and jewels, cash and all other worldly, heathen goods into my hands, perhaps this would free you all even more for your trip upwards at Rapturetide, a bit like losing some ballast for a balloon trip........

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: May I help?

# # various # #

Please stop taking drugs & post an introduction HERE

after that there may be 1 or 2 who are interested in the ukelele (or not)

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: May I help?

I shall therefore take my punishment knowing that I have at least protected some good and godly souls from my neverending torture at a ten thousand year long jamming session with other sinners, such as Elvis and his gluttony, John Lennon and his hippy ways, Waylon Jennings and everything, Phil Lynott, all those sinners I shall be forced to play bass for as my eternal punishment.

Could you please show me where the Bible says Hell is some wild orgy of fun?

My Bible says it is God's vast Lake of Fire, and that after Judgment, you and all other sinners will be cast into it and burned alive. You will be unable to die and unable to escape, so you will be burning for all eternity.

Hell is not accurately depicted in Little Nicky.

[Grampa]

Re: My uncle gave me a pearl necklace!

I sometimes give my granddaughter a peal necklace, she loves them, I only give it to her for a while then give it back for her to wear another time when she ahs been a good Christian girl.