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  • Capt. Aaron Portway
    One of the Lord's Airborne Rangers
    Salvation from Above
    God's Favorite Pilot™
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2008
    • 6309

    #1

    Jana Cova! Photos of not nude Model PROVES Hardcore Creationism!

    The other day, I was innocently searching the internets for something holy, I forget what, when I came across pictures of this woman:




    Her name is Jana Cova, she is some sort of model and I'm guessing she's not a True Christian™, since I've never seen her here in Freehold. Anyway, this got me to thinking. Obviously she is very beautiful. God did one heck of a job on her, let me tell you! Her parents must be awfully proud of her and they must be AWFULLY good Christians for the Lord to reward them with such an attractive daughter! Here is another picture of her for good measure, doesn't she look sweet?


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    On to my point. Secular scientists are always going ON and ON about evolution this and natural selection that! But COME ON! There is just no ding-danged way that someone who looks like Jana Cova could just accidentally happen! AND take a look at the next two pictures. See any resemblance?


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    Of course not! But Just to play Devil's advocate for a minute, let's just for giggles say that evolution is a real thing (yeah right!). Anyway, if this whole evolution thing actually existed, that still doesn't mean that Jana Cova would have to be related to monkeys, right? I mean LOOK AT HER for gosh sakes!


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    So, take THAT secular scientists! I think it's pretty darned obvious that not only is Jana Cova not related to monkeys, but that ALL people were created by God in His image. He just created some of us more like Him than others I guess. Now, I know this may all seem a little pointless, since it says in the KJV 1611 that God created the earth and everything else.

    Originally posted by Genesis 1:1
    In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
    But if those secular scientists are going to keep trying to spread their lies, we True Christians™ are going to have to keep refudiating them! Glory!


    Edit:
    Turns out Jana Cova is a slutty porn queen!

    See, my JesOS auto-filters the smut. I talked to Phil (that unsaved colored guy) down at Landover Field and he gave me the lowdown on this tramp! But I still stand by my original argument that she's not a monkey, just a whore. A beautiful, beautiful hellbound whore.
    Last edited by Capt. Aaron Portway; 05-13-2011, 09:16 PM. Reason: To protect non-JesOS™ users from the porn!
    sigpic


    Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



    God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



    Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
  • Professor Bessemer
    Professor of Creation Science at Landover University
    Certified Ex-Gay Program Graduate
    Darwin's Worst Nightmare
    True Christian™
    • May 2009
    • 2952

    #2
    Re: Jana Cova! Photos of not nude Model PROVES Hardcore Creationi

    Originally posted by Capt. A. Portway View Post
    The other day, I was innocently searching the internets for something holy, I forget what, when I came across pictures of this woman:




    Her name is Jana Cova, she is some sort of model and I'm guessing she's not a True Christian™, since I've never seen her here in Freehold. Anyway, this got me to thinking. Obviously she is very beautiful. God did one heck of a job on her, let me tell you! Her parents must be awfully proud of her and they must be AWFULLY good Christians for the Lord to reward them with such an attractive daughter! Here is another picture of her for good measure, doesn't she look sweet?


    [ATTACH]16382[/ATTACH]


    On to my point. Secular scientists are always going ON and ON about evolution this and natural selection that! But COME ON! There is just no ding-danged way that someone who looks like Jana Cova could just accidentally happen! AND take a look at the next two pictures. See any resemblance?


    [ATTACH]16383[/ATTACH]


    Of course not! But Just to play Devil's advocate for a minute, let's just for giggles say that evolution is a real thing (yeah right!). Anyway, if this whole evolution thing actually existed, that still doesn't mean that Jana Cova would have to be related to monkeys, right? I mean LOOK AT HER for gosh sakes!


    [ATTACH]16384[/ATTACH]


    So, take THAT secular scientists! I think it's pretty darned obvious that not only is Jana Cova not related to monkeys, but that ALL people were created by God in His image. He just created some of us more like Him than others I guess. Now, I know this may all seem a little pointless, since it says in the KJV 1611 that God created the earth and everything else.



    But if those secular scientists are going to keep trying to spread their lies, we True Christians™ are going to have to keep refudiating them! Glory!


    Edit:
    Turns out Jana Cova is a slutty porn queen!

    See, my JesOS auto-filters the smut. I talked to Phil (that unsaved colored guy) down at Landover Field and he gave me the lowdown on this tramp! But I still stand by my original argument that she's not a monkey, just a whore. A beautiful, beautiful hellbound whore.
    Brother Portway, I hate to disagree with another True Christian™, but I find this Jana Cova trollop anything but attractive. In truth, I find her utterly repugnant! Those enormous cow like eyes, and that thin smear of a mouth make her look like some sort of alien from Mars.

    Of course, the fact that this Jana Cova person demeans herself and the Lord by disrobing for pay only adds to the revulsion I felt when I first laid eyes on this deformed slattern. I very nearly feel pity for Satan himself that one day, he will have to meet that monstrosity face to face!
    Professor of Creation Science and Flood Geology at Landover Baptist University


    sigpic

    Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

    Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21

    Comment

    • Capt. Aaron Portway
      One of the Lord's Airborne Rangers
      Salvation from Above
      God's Favorite Pilot™
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2008
      • 6309

      #3
      Re: Jana Cova! Photos of not nude Model PROVES Hardcore Creationi

      Originally posted by Professor Bessemer View Post
      Brother Portway, I hate to disagree with another True Christian™, but I find this Jana Cova trollop anything but attractive. In truth, I find her utterly repugnant! Those enormous cow like eyes, and that thin smear of a mouth make her look like some sort of alien from Mars.

      Of course, the fact that this Jana Cova person demeans herself and the Lord by disrobing for pay only adds to the revulsion I felt when I first laid eyes on this deformed slattern. I very nearly feel pity for Satan himself that one day, he will have to meet that monstrosity face to face!
      Seriously? You think she's ugly?!? How can you say that? I mean, since I found out she was a porno whore, I definitely don't feel the same way about her, but she is FAR from ugly!

      You really think Jana Cova's ugly? I don't get it, unless it's got something do with the fact that you used to be a homo. Don't get me wrong, I know you're cured and all, but maybe you . . . I don't know. I still think she's pretty, even though I know she's a hellbound slut that shows her cooter for a living.

      Edit:
      Not that I've seen her cooter or anything, I'm not some unsaved pervert. Phil just told me he'd seen her cooter, like LOTS of times. But he's just a poor unsaved coon.
      Last edited by Capt. Aaron Portway; 05-13-2011, 11:26 PM. Reason: To make sure people know I don't look at the porno.
      sigpic


      Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



      God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



      Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!

      Comment

      • Professor Bessemer
        Professor of Creation Science at Landover University
        Certified Ex-Gay Program Graduate
        Darwin's Worst Nightmare
        True Christian™
        • May 2009
        • 2952

        #4
        Re: Jana Cova! Photos of not nude Model PROVES Hardcore Creationi

        Originally posted by Capt. A. Portway View Post
        Seriously? You think she's ugly?!? How can you say that? I mean, since I found out she was a porno whore, I definitely don't feel the same way about her, but she is FAR from ugly!

        You really think Jana Cova's ugly? I don't get it, unless it's got something do with the fact that you used to be a homo. Don't get me wrong, I know you're cured and all, but maybe you . . . I don't know. I still think she's pretty, even though I know she's a hellbound slut that shows her cooter for a living.
        Brother Portway, I will have you know that I am now a 100% heterosexual man! I find it in very bad taste for you to insinuate that my former life as a raging homosexual power bottom size queen would somehow make me a poor judge of female beauty.

        I will admit that on several occasions, when I have accidently seen images of nude pornoraphical models displaying their genitalia for all the world to see, I have become physically ill. But this had nothing to do with the images themselves. It was the fact that one of God's own creations could debase herself so completely that caused me to become nauseated.

        If I were to imagine Jana Cova on her back with legs akimbo right now, I am certain I would feel the urge to vomit. Actually, that would probably occur if I were to imagine any pornographical actress in a similar position. Truth be told, just thinking about imagining the above has caused me to feel uncomfortable. I need to go lie down for a few minutes.
        Professor of Creation Science and Flood Geology at Landover Baptist University


        sigpic

        Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

        Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21

        Comment

        • Rev. M. Rodimer
          Honorary True Christian™
          Forum Member
          • May 2008
          • 13996

          #5
          Re: Jana Cova! Photos of not nude Model PROVES Hardcore Creationi

          Originally posted by Professor Bessemer View Post
          Brother Portway, I will have you know that I am now a 100% heterosexual man! I find it in very bad taste for you to insinuate that my former life as a raging homosexual power bottom size queen would somehow make me a poor judge of female beauty.

          I will admit that on several occasions, when I have accidently seen images of nude pornoraphical models displaying their genitalia for all the world to see, I have become physically ill. But this had nothing to do with the images themselves. It was the fact that one of God's own creations could debase herself so completely that caused me to become nauseated.

          If I were to imagine Jana Cova on her back with legs akimbo right now, I am certain I would feel the urge to vomit. Actually, that would probably occur if I were to imagine any pornographical actress in a similar position. Truth be told, just thinking about imagining the above has caused me to feel uncomfortable. I need to go lie down for a few minutes.
          Professor Gossamer, I know exactly how you feel!

          These harlots with their whoredoms make me want to vomit!
          Bible boring? Nonsense!
          Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
          You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

          Comment

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